My girlfriend and I just broke up. The reason - her meddling ex-boyfriend. The kid was crazy, had never gotten over her (they dated for two weeks and he already loved her) and was coming between the two of us. She would constantly text and talk to him on the phone even with me sitting right next to her. I just think if she really cared about the relationship, she would have tried to stop things. She told me that she was his only friend, which, the reason for that seem to me to be because this ex is an is responsible for splitting us up and almost splitting her and her best friend up as well. She also wasn't willing to compromise, as you have to in all relationships. Things weren't 50-50, 60-40, Or anywhere close like they should be. I was the one putting everything into the relationship it seemed.

Another thing which may have factored in was she was very sheltered as a child and couldn't do normal kid things. She also went to a religious school until her senior year and didn't experience the drama and angst of going through middle and high school like most of us. It seems she's going through it now and hasn't matured even though she is 22.
I told her how upset I was that he kept hanging around. We almost broke up this past weekend, but decided to try to rebuild our relationship. Now, her ex was the reason we almost broke up, and she calls to tell me she's having him over to help move some boxes and other things. I tell her he makes me nervous because it doesn't seem like he understands boundaries and they are through. She replies, "so, you'd rather me not have help?" I was at work or I would have helped her. She then says, "well he's helping me move other things out of my apartment." I told her I just feel nervous about him being with you and it was too soon to throw this in my face and bring the reason why we almost broke up back into the relationship.

She also would tell me how much she couldn't stand this kid, but yet still talk to him and hang out with him. She told him they couldn't be friends any more so I wouldn't have to worry, but he still kept calling her. She also told me one night she felt lonely, so she called him instead of me and I was her boyfriend. What gives?

Now, I really miss her and think we made a mistake, but looking at the future, I don't think I deserved to be treated the way I was and will find someone who won't lead me on as she did.

You were absolutely correct in ending the relationship! Just my opinion but I would run, not walk in the opposite direction from this girl. You were very patient and there are others out there just hoping to find someone who could care for them and be a patient person in their life like you seem to be. Glad you didn't wait any longer!

This isn't about her ex boyfriend, it's about you. She's being honest and you think you are, too, but you're not.

HONESTY is deciding whether you want to date exclusively a girl who has a clear and continuing relationship with an ex. You can actually have a fine relationship with her with him around, you can, but only if YOU aren't an idiot about it.

I'm not calling you an idiot, I'm pointing out that your behavior will have predictable results, so you might as well just be honest NOW about whether you will put up with this or not.

Your choices DON'T include requiring her to kick him out of her life because you want her to. You tried that, and she's already told you "not gonna happen."

You're only choices are:

1. I can have a healthy relationship with her regardless of who else is in her life = stay
2. I can't do it = leave

Be honest, make a choice, own it, don't blame her.

I should have clarified in the question: I didn't mind if they were still friends. I never told her she had to choose. I told her it upset me because it felt like she wanted to be with him more than me. If someone I really cared about was upset with something I was doing, I would try to work a compromise out with them or try to tone down whatever it was I was doing. I also never told her she had to "kick him out of her life." In fact, she was the one that tried to end their friendship because he was frustrating her, showing up at places she was at all the time and exhibiting other stalking behaviors. When she told me she broke it off so I wouldn't have to worry, I told her repeatedly you can still be friends and I want you to be friends. Also, she told me she was lonely one night, so she called him instead of me. I'm her boyfriend. That makes me feel like crap.
He also told her she could do much better than me. What kind of guy is that? You broke up with her, get over it and let her move on. If he truly "loved" her, he should be happy that she was happy.

You know exactly what you want in a relationship, and in this case, you want a girl who's committed to you. In that case, then you did the right thing.

Go for what makes you happy.

Since you are not happy with these circumstanses, you did the right thing by removing yourself from the situation. Good luck!

It would be a stumbling block for me as well - for others it may not have been. I wouldn't have had the strength to run, but in your situation I would say you did well.. Cut your losses while you're still ahead.