God what to say... what would you say to a guy who spends 40 minutes to an hour and half foreplaying his wife of a year now then last all the way to give her an orgasem taking about 30 to 40 other minutes unless she gives up on having an orgasem and asks me to 1st (happens very rarely.. she always goes first and I know she isn't faking because when she can't orgasem she just blurts it out and she always get really high after orgasming) then after that stay about 20 minutes after sex in bed with her holding her... now... what if I told you with all that she wants sex like twice or three times a month... 6 months ago we used to have it every single day sometimes twice a day... now its gone... and she would do none of the things she used to do for me... no BJ or HJ... not even regulare sex.

When I tried to talk to her about it she would get in a bad mood and say I disgust her because I want sex so much so I stopped trying to talk about it after three times of trying... isn't it normal to want to talk about it or for it to mean something in a relationship? I'm not asking for much... I do everything for this woman everything.. I work so hard mean while trying to finish my studies.. and all she is doing is painting all day and nagging me and making me feel bad the rest of it.

All I want is at least twice a week.. and trust me I have done everything... romantic talks.. role playing.. sex toys.. romantic dinners at the beach... spa treatments.. spoiling her.. being always with her even when she is in her worst mood swings I am there right by her side... (she has been getting a lot of mood swings recently.. and when ever I ask her what is wrong or what is bothering her she replies with nothing is wrong.. sometimes she would say I would never understand. Even though I always do listen and be very gentle as I can be).

I am just so tired of it... I start thinking of leaving her or cheating on her even though I realyyyy don't want to.. I love her so much.. but its killing me that I am holding this whole relation ship on my shoulders and I have so many stressors yet she is the one that's nagging and complaining and instead of going home to my loving wife.. to someone I can hold.. some one I can talk to... I get nothing but more heartach and pain.

What should I do.. what is going on? Any ideas? If you have any questions please ask and I will answer about this.

Thank you all so much and blv me it means so so much to me all of your opinions.

Hey don't get disheartened... this phase does come... im a wife to a very nice man.I know he loves me and does everything he can for me but believe me I don't know what happened I just didn't want him to touch me... initially when I got in this kind of mood I did nt want to hurt him so I tried faking it for sometime but then that too got very difficult for me to continue... I would get in bad mood when he would touch me in bed... would resent it like anything... then after about a year I realised what I was doing is not done... I tried getting back to him satisfying him on my own... so I think sometimes this kind of mood swing does meddle with a lot of things in marriage .I would say give her time... do get back.. im sure you will feel relaxed a little if not much...

Many men are in the same boat. This is advice from a woman, mind you. I have heard this so many times and I absolutely feel for you, I really do.

It would help, just a tad, if I knew how old both of you are, she could be menopausal and that would explain her attitude in part toward sex. Sex is a basic part of a healthy relationship and should not be treated lightly be either party and in particular your wife. Little does she know that she is destroying her relationship, life partner, lifestyle, whatever you want to call it.

You have already done many things that I usually suggest, romantic evenings, etc.

Get her to a doctor to be checked out. Menopausal women go through the gammut of emotions and be thankful she hasn't tried to hammer you over the head. I never suggest counselling because I so believe to do that is a real cop out. Anyone can say get counselling and avoids so many issues that can be dealt with within the home between two people on a good communication level. You two obviously aren't but it isn't too late with some really subtle hints from you. Just get gently physical, sit her down, have a heart to heart and tell her exactly what you think is going on. But first of all, she must know how much you really love her, the last straw would be for you to find sex elsewhere, so don't go there please. That would put you on the road to nowhere. Good luck downlookingup.