brian1231
Apr 24, 2008, 07:41 AM
Hello,
I broke up with my fiancée ~6 weeks ago (3 weeks since last contact) and I was hoping for some advice. I loved/still lover her to death and she always made me feel like I won the lottery with every moment I got to spend with her.
She had been going through a lot of external stress in her life (family problems, career etc... ) but we had been doing better than ever. She would constantly thank me for always being there for her. She was ecstatic about planning our wedding, getting her dress etc... She began to see a counselor last summer because of some depression issues.
In the 2-3 days before the final BU, she had what I would call a slight mental breakdown which required her to miss work and see her psychiatrist on an emergency visit. The night she moved out, she told me how much she loved me, how she needed to get fixed, and how she would come find me once she got better so we could be together again. She kept begging me to always be there for her if she needed me. She gave me a gigantic kiss goodbye and then was off. Her decision came as a complete shock to even her best girlfriends.
* 1 day after BU - Calls/emails me telling me how much I mean to her, and how none of this is related to me. Tells me/our mutual friends that she loves me more than I could ever possibly imagine. Tells me that her therapist wants her to remain on good terms with me, but that she shouldn't be in a relationship for like a year.
*1 week after BU - We speak on phone, I ask her for coffee. She says that she cannot because her feelings for me are still so strong
*2 weeks after BU - We spoke briefly, she tells mutual friends that she loves me, but can't marry me like she is, but also tells them things like "we wouldn't have worked out anyways because (insert trivial, very fixable reason)"
*3 weeks after BU - I sent her flowers with a note wishing her well/asking her to coffee. She calls me thanking me for them and was very happy to get them. When I mentioned the meeting for coffee part, she fairly angrily responds "This is not the time to even think about that, I still have not found a new job yet." I told her that I cared for her, and that I hope that she has a good life if we never speak again.
I haven't spoke with her in the 3 weeks since then. In those weeks, she has been going to bars/out dancing a lot with her friends. She is also now living with her parents who HATE me.
I don't know what to think. She seems to be contradictory as to what she is telling me. Any advice would be appreciated
I broke up with my fiancée ~6 weeks ago (3 weeks since last contact) and I was hoping for some advice. I loved/still lover her to death and she always made me feel like I won the lottery with every moment I got to spend with her.
She had been going through a lot of external stress in her life (family problems, career etc... ) but we had been doing better than ever. She would constantly thank me for always being there for her. She was ecstatic about planning our wedding, getting her dress etc... She began to see a counselor last summer because of some depression issues.
In the 2-3 days before the final BU, she had what I would call a slight mental breakdown which required her to miss work and see her psychiatrist on an emergency visit. The night she moved out, she told me how much she loved me, how she needed to get fixed, and how she would come find me once she got better so we could be together again. She kept begging me to always be there for her if she needed me. She gave me a gigantic kiss goodbye and then was off. Her decision came as a complete shock to even her best girlfriends.
* 1 day after BU - Calls/emails me telling me how much I mean to her, and how none of this is related to me. Tells me/our mutual friends that she loves me more than I could ever possibly imagine. Tells me that her therapist wants her to remain on good terms with me, but that she shouldn't be in a relationship for like a year.
*1 week after BU - We speak on phone, I ask her for coffee. She says that she cannot because her feelings for me are still so strong
*2 weeks after BU - We spoke briefly, she tells mutual friends that she loves me, but can't marry me like she is, but also tells them things like "we wouldn't have worked out anyways because (insert trivial, very fixable reason)"
*3 weeks after BU - I sent her flowers with a note wishing her well/asking her to coffee. She calls me thanking me for them and was very happy to get them. When I mentioned the meeting for coffee part, she fairly angrily responds "This is not the time to even think about that, I still have not found a new job yet." I told her that I cared for her, and that I hope that she has a good life if we never speak again.
I haven't spoke with her in the 3 weeks since then. In those weeks, she has been going to bars/out dancing a lot with her friends. She is also now living with her parents who HATE me.
I don't know what to think. She seems to be contradictory as to what she is telling me. Any advice would be appreciated