View Full Version : Afraid Marriage is over
lulu2912
Apr 23, 2008, 10:24 AM
My husband and I have been married for almost 6 years. We have been together a total of 9 years. I am 25 and he is 26. We have a 5 year old son together and I am due to deliver our daughter on June 14th. About 2 years ago I started talking to another man. I intended it to only be a friendship and was not interested in getting involved with anyone. I love my husband and never wanted to hurt him. I should have known I was doing wrong by not telling him about this person. We only talked about 2 months and met just a few times. It never got physical with the exception of one kiss and I told him I did not want that type of relationship with him. My husband eventually found out I had been talking to him and so I told him about the type of relationship we had. Through a lot of heart ache he decided to stay with me. We decided to have another baby and we bought our first house about 6 months ago. A couple of days ago he told me that he has been fighting his feelings since everything happened and that he is too hurt and just doesn't know if he can stay. He thinks that more happened between this person and I and no matter what I tell him he will always think that way. I love my husband very much and I know that I made a huge mistake. I am so confused right now and bringing another child into our family at this point is just heartbreaking for me. I don't want to loose my husband or the life we have together with our children. Does anyone have any advice on what I or we should do?
ashley0716
Apr 23, 2008, 10:36 AM
Marriage counseling... and if you are religious, possibly with a pastor? You destroyed in him the most crucial aspect of a marriage, TRUST. You failed to communicate with him, leading him to believe you were in fact hiding something. You should never talk to men in hopes to have friendships with them, it leads to affairs. I highly suggest marriage counseling, it can help restore faith in each other and allows a neutral third party to see things you can't make each other see. Good Luck!
lulu2912
Apr 23, 2008, 10:38 AM
Yes, I have thought of bringing up Counseling. I know I made a huge mistake, and I regret it deeply. I hope we can work this out.
MrsJoseph06
Apr 23, 2008, 10:46 AM
I agree counseling is the way to go. You have 2 kids to think about! I hope you can work things out.
you_know
Apr 23, 2008, 10:52 AM
You know you could just prove to him how much you love him and let him know that you will never do it again. I would suggest marriage counseling to but you need to show he can trust you
.
talaniman
Apr 23, 2008, 01:04 PM
Your mistake was not being upfront, and honest, his mistake is not trusting. Counseling can help you both.
FeelingBlue
Apr 23, 2008, 10:10 PM
Salvage your marriage if you can. I agree with the person that answered you last. Your husband should be your friend and not any other man. Go to counseling and save your marriage if you can. My hopes are that your husband can trust you again. There is evidently a void in your life that your husband has not been able to fill. Good luck and my prayers are with you.