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View Full Version : Shy or likes me as a friend


camcamchamb
Apr 1, 2008, 07:28 PM
Someone told this guy I liked him ( Ive liked him for a long time but he never showed any unmistakeable interest in me before so I never did anything. We are both almost 20 and he's never had a girlfriend or kissed a girl before)

Good things:
-after he found out, one day he touched me on the shoulders at practice. It was weird- he's an instructor and he was showing me where to go. I went where he told me to go but he still touched me very lightly on both shoulders. I got a little freaked out because he's never touched me and Ive never seen him do that to other girls.
-another time at dinner when I sat next to him, I was talking and he patted me on the shoulder. Again, it was weird, esp because he wasn't looking at me as he did it.
-a little later one weekend we got a little tipsy (I was only a bit, Im not sure about him. He def was not drunk. Its hard to tell because he sometimes does this thing where he has 2 drinks and "pretends") he acted like he liked me, flirted. I didn't want to read anything into it but some there said he might I think because he doesn't usually even flirt while drunk? I almost told him that night that I liked him. After the gathering I went to his room and said "lets talk" seriously but then totally chickenedout and just left without saying anything. He went "what happened?" and left me 2 voicemails. The second one said "hey, hope you got back to your room OK ill IM you tomorrow" and he did right away in the morning. I assumed he thought I was mad and that's why, but we aren't close friends at all and he never brought it up. Hes very nice so I think he wants people to like him.

Bad things:
-The day after that night at lunch he waved to me but didn't come sit next to me. He doesn't usually sit with my friends so I guess that could be why, but he knows my friends at least so if he really did like me he could have sat next to me.
-He apparently told his friends he didn't like me. Im thinking because of this he doesn't. (Im not sure though, because he friends are very catty and immature. They meddled when they figured out I liked him. I never told them to do anything cause I hardly know them; apparently they pressured him a little. But this guy tends to tell his friends everything. After all of this I got pretty mad so I stopped hanging out with him and just pretended like they didn't exist. This guy kept asking a mutual friend why I wasn't responding to him and if I was acting weird around other people. Again I think this is him wanting everyone to like him)

I thought maybe I was just an ego boost to him. I am a very pretty girl, not trying to sound arrogant but people tell me. I don't think he has had a lot of attractive girls like him. I think maybe he was just playing with me? I don't know that doesn't seem like him. Or maybe he thought he was interested but changed his mind.

I won't lie, I thought he might be gay. Other people have thought he might be too because he's extremely sensitive and is kind of catty too I guess but I don't see it as much. Im not sure about this because he has some gay tendencies but also some not so gay tendencies. But he has liked past girls apparently.

Scleros
Apr 2, 2008, 07:05 PM
he never showed any unmistakeable interest in me before...

And you haven't shown any unmistakeable interest in him. Stalemate.

Stop analyzing and start doing. Touch him back. If you want to analyze, analyze your own actions toward him from his perspective. What would you think?

JBeaucaire
Apr 3, 2008, 04:42 AM
What year in school are you?

Shake off all the drama. Stop getting your love concepts from your friends and bad TV... and definitely ignore drunken behavior.

If you think something is happening, walk over and ask him. Not your friends, no emails, no texts, no private obssessive "I wonder this...I wonder that"... just ask him.

If you can't just talk to guys you're beginning to take an interest in, how do you expect to actually date them? Whether he's shy or not, people will talk to you when you talk to them.

And when you talk to him, don't be crazy chick. Just talk. Ask questions, tell stories, laugh, grumble, just talk.

If he sticks around through all that, he likes you... enough to consider asking him out. If he doesn't, there you go. No harm, no foul.