Alrighty. Here we go. I recently stopped taking birth control after taking it for about a year or less, about a month give or take ago, and for the first time I had ovulation discharge like they had described, I hardly ever had the yolky discharge before. My reason for birth control was a painful, and long period, sometimes I got them 2 in one month. Anyway, me and my hubby did the horizontal tango a couple times during then. Now according to my birth control schedule because my other one was unpredictable, my period is 5 days late. I'm getting all sorts of symptoms, nausea at different times once or twice a day, dizziness seldom but it's there, very dull dull pressure headaches, backaches which are due to mild scoliosis, stiff neck, not due to scoliosis because I usually don't get it this bad... usually... I've been pretty tired, and when I get my period, I'm usually depressed but this time it's more so than usual. Also I've been getting cramps, and I usually don't burp, sorry if too much info, but I usually don't and lately, usually with nausea sometimes without, I've been burping like crazy. I've taken 2 tests that have come up negative after 4 weeks and 5 days from my last cycle. Unbiased, what does this sound like?

Either you're pregnant or you've eaten some pretty strange food that is giving you intestinal problems.