View Full Version : Son wants to live with his mom
jbos28
Mar 29, 2008, 05:48 PM
Hi,
My 12 year old son wants to live with his mom. We have 50-50 live in the same town same school, he hasn't given me any reasons just wants to. It is tearing me apart I don't want to let him but what's in his best interest? Thanks
N0help4u
Mar 29, 2008, 06:08 PM
Often kids want to be with one parent over another for various reasons often not for their own best interest. He could feel he is missing out on his friends in moms neighborhood, mom could be letting him get away with more. You need to keep your scheduled custody because the less you see him the more distance there can be with him toward you if you drift apart.
Fr_Chuck
Mar 29, 2008, 06:14 PM
What is the court order for physcial custody ? That is what is suppose to be followed.
Or you split time between, was there a reason the child is living with you ?
justcurious55
Mar 29, 2008, 07:44 PM
Find out why. He's getting older and soon the court will be listening more to what he wants. So unless it's a harmful reason like "well mom lets me drink and smoke" (not saying that it is, just an extreme example) if that's what he wants then let him. If you force him to continue living 50/50 with you and he doesn't want to he'll resent you for it later.
ldyastrid
Mar 31, 2008, 11:02 AM
Or... it could very well be that he feels because he lives in between 2 places that he doesn't have a real "home"... yes - he has 2 homes, but in reality - he has to bounce back and forth between the two - two different homes / bedrooms / expectations / rules (I'm guessing some of the rules are the same, but probably some are different - what's OK at your place might be unacceptable at hers... or vice-versa)
Just giving another perspective - not really having any advice to give - but communicate with him about it - he doesn't want to hurt either of your feelings, so he keeps quiet about HIS feelings - and at 12 years old - all kinds of things are happening with him - as with all kinds around that age.
Please talk - all 3 of you - separately (father/son, mother/son, mother/father, all three of you - work together to make the best deicision for him.
Best of luck!