View Full Version : New Beginnings.
Hottrodder246
Mar 21, 2008, 07:01 PM
Just wanted everyone to know that the move to another state has done wonders for me, life is great, my job is awesome and I'm happy. I think about my ex but I don't feel bad about it anymore. I finally feel good about myself and I work out everyday and I do a lot of volunteer work, basically, everything is awesome. Just wanted some advice on a situation I'm in. I met this girl through my cousin and his g/f. We met up at my house a week ago and hung around all day watching movies, me and this girl hit it off immediately, by the end of the night me and her were cuddling and kissing. After that night my cousin told me that she liked me and I liked her too. Over the next couple days, she hasn't replied to any of my texts and she keeps ignoring my phone calls. The one time she did answer me, she had very little to say, maybe 5 words total. I thought to myself what the hell? This morning I sent her a text asking what's up and what are you doing today, I never got a response. What's going on here?
Leonstryfe
Mar 21, 2008, 07:08 PM
Slow down man... I mean... really slow it DOWN lol. Cause she probably felt too intimidated by your first night... if you like this girl... stop contacting her so much... you're going to scare her
TrueFaith
Mar 21, 2008, 07:13 PM
Yeah I couldn't agree more. You let them contact you after something like that. Not the other way round.. slow down man ;)
Don't look for a relationship with the first chick you kiss ease into it :)
And enjoy the feeling that comes with attracting people
nauticalstar420
Mar 21, 2008, 07:18 PM
Hey! I'm so glad to see you are doing better about your ex. It is so good for you to be over that.
As far as the current girl, she may be starting to feel a little smothered by you constantly trying to contact her. I know you like her, but you have to back off a little bit. That may be hard to hear, but it is true. Are you sure she did not want this to be a one night thing? A girl can like a guy, but not want to pursue a relationship with him. You may want to think about that. She might think you are better off as friends.
Take a little time and stop calling, texting, etc. Stop contacting her, cold turkey, for about a week or so, then call her and ask how she's been doing. She might respond better to your calls after not being bombarded with them for a while. If she talks to you after that week (or so), you should be able to tell through the tone of her voice and how she talks to you, whether she wants to have a relationship with you.
Just like with your ex hun, you need to back off a little bit. It sounds like you may be coming on a little strong, which can be bad especially since you do not know her very well. Remember, a first impression is everything, and if you act this way in the beginning, she may be afraid you will be this way during the whole relationship, if she chooses to have one with you.
ISneezeFunny
Mar 21, 2008, 07:19 PM
I'd hate to say it... there's a chance you may have lost her. I know women hate the "3 day rule"... but to be honest, there's a reason it existed at one point.
Savor the moment. Don't jump into it so quick.
Hottrodder246
Mar 22, 2008, 01:26 PM
I'd hate to say it...there's a chance you may have lost her. I know women hate the "3 day rule"...but to be honest, there's a reason it existed at one point.
savor the moment. Don't jump into it so quick.
Well that kind of sucks, I think I did come on a little too strong and I'm horrible at reading girls so I think I blew it with this one. I think my problem is I'm rushing to fall in love again to fill in that empty void.
confused25
Mar 22, 2008, 01:59 PM
i think my problem is im rushing to fall in love again to fill in that empty void.
Bingo! That's exactly your problem. Slow down and stop calling her. If she is interested she will contact you.
ihatewestseneca
Mar 22, 2008, 02:33 PM
Most guys think that they have to please the woman and be really attentive because men are the hunters. It is true that, as men, we have to initiate most things... but what some men don't realize is that after we initiate anything, we have to step back and let the rest fall into place. Don't force anything... you're the catch, not her, let her work for you.
Sadly I do agree that you may have blown this one... leave her alone, and hopefully, if you didn't totally turn her off to you, she'll call you sometime.
Fr_Chuck
Mar 22, 2008, 03:26 PM
Often when we first start getting over one person we jump like a race horse out the gate toward another one.
SLOW DOWN
Hottrodder246
Mar 22, 2008, 07:57 PM
Hahaha the funny thing is I'm laughing about the whole thing, I do like her, but I know I'm a wonderful guy and it will only be her lose.
nauticalstar420
Mar 22, 2008, 08:01 PM
hahaha the funny thing is im laughing about the whole thing, i do like her, but i know im a wonderful guy and it will only be her lose.
It may not be a loss for her if you don't start slowing down. You can be the nicest guy in the world, but if you are pushy and smother her, she won't go for you, even with your good qualities.
People don't usually decide they like someone enough to have a relationship with them overnight. It can take time. Right now, you two are probably no more than an acquaintance; at the acquaintance status, nobody wants to be bothered that much by the other person.
talaniman
Mar 24, 2008, 05:31 PM
I hope your learning from your mistakes.
Hottrodder246
Mar 26, 2008, 11:20 AM
I hope your learning from your mistakes.
Yea one thing I learned is to learn from your mistakes, doesn't make sense to repeat the same errors. And I was thinking the other night, this is just an idea, but should I tell her Im sorry for coming on to strong and kind of explain why I was over anxious to start something so soon?
talaniman
Mar 26, 2008, 04:21 PM
this is just an idea, but should I tell her Im sorry for coming on to strong and kind of explain why I was over anxious to start something so soon?
You can't unring a bell, and sometimes it doesn't pay to try. Look forward, not back.