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BabyyGiirl2010
Mar 19, 2008, 11:41 AM
My name is Ashley and I'm 16. I had sex with my boyfriend on the 15th of march and it was unportected, it was also my first time. I am due for my period on the 22nd but I think I may be pregnant. I think about it all the time, and I know its too early for signs. I actually do want to become pregnant, I've wanted this for a very long time. I should find out like next week or so.

Please help in any way you can thanks!
<3 Ashley:)

this8384
Mar 19, 2008, 11:59 AM
You can become pregnant anytime you have unprotected sex, whether it's your first time or not.

I'm sure you've heard this a million times, but you are waaay too young to have a baby right now. You may have a good maternal instinct but right now is not the time. Have a baby when you have a certain future - when you have a job to support the child, when you have a home to raise it in. High school is not the time to try for a baby. You've got plenty of time; enjoy your teenage years!

BabyyGiirl2010
Mar 19, 2008, 12:06 PM
My name is Ashley and im 16. I had sex with my boyfriend on the 15th of march and it was unportected, it was also my first time. I am due for my period on the 22nd but I think I may be pregnant. I think about it all the time, and I know its too early for signs. I actually do want to become pregnant, ive wanted this for a very long time. I should find out like next week or so.

Please help in any way you can thanks!!
<3 Ashley:)
Ummm, well that's not helping me any. I wanted to know things that like might help me detect if I am or not. I know I'm young, but I know I can do this, Ive raised my 2 little cousins since they were born so I know how everything works.
But thanks anyway.

this8384
Mar 19, 2008, 12:08 PM
You can't detect if you're 4 days pregnant; that's impossible. You need to wait and see if you miss your period or not.

BabyyGiirl2010
Mar 19, 2008, 12:11 PM
Well like I know all the symptoms and stuff but like I can't wait to find out. I think I would be upset if the test was negative.

this8384
Mar 19, 2008, 12:14 PM
Does your boyfriend know you want to get pregnant?

BabyyGiirl2010
Mar 19, 2008, 12:28 PM
Yea! He does too! We were just trying to figure out timing and stuf, but when we did it, we weren't thinking about it at the moment lol it just happened. But we both want it a lot!

Synnen
Mar 19, 2008, 12:50 PM
You are out of your flippin' mind.

First off, wait until you miss a period before even testing, and then test with first morning urine.

Second--Do you have a job? A diploma? Enough money for a place that isn't your mommy and daddy's? Day care lined up? A car to take the baby to the hospital when it's so sick you can't even think straight? At least $1000 a month to spend on formula and diapers? Insurance? A MARRIAGE certificate? The last, while not necessary, is a pretty good indicator of stability in your relationship with your boyfriend, which will change IMMEDIATELY after having a child.

Do you realize you'll be giving up going out with your friends? I'm not even talking about partying. I'm talking that by the time you finish school for the day (and you had BETTER plan on finishing school), and then get home from your job, and finish your homework (and takign care of the baby the entire time you're home), you'll be EXHAUSTED. And then, just when you think you can't take anymore--the baby gets colicky, and you can't sleep anyway, because you're up all night with the baby.

You're freaking nuts.

And if you think that I want to use my taxpayer's money to help YOU raise a child you are in no way, shape or form ready to have or support, you're sadly mistaken.

Get on birth control, little girl. You only THINK you're ready for a baby. Unless you graduated early and have a great job, you aren't even CLOSE to ready.

bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE
Mar 19, 2008, 12:55 PM
4 days is too soon to get any kind of symptoms. One of the earliest symptoms that a woman can get is sore breasts and tiredness.

BabyyGiirl2010
Mar 19, 2008, 01:02 PM
Ummm, for the person who wrote the book to me, I got something to say, and if you don't like it then don't respond to anything else I say!!

First off you don't know anything about me because I didn't write all of that down. And Ummm, I am ready, I know what I have to give up and all of that I'm not sum little girl who decided she was going to have sex and get pregnant!! I know what the hell I'm doing!!
And second, my boyfriend is in the military, we have all the money we need and my mom won't let me leave anyway!! She said if I am pregnant she wants me to be there so she can help and be apart of my baby's life!! My boyfriend can get any job he wants. So don't sit there and tell me what I should and shouldn't be doing! I know what the hell I'm doing so don't come at me like that unless you know my info!

Got it?
Thanks!!

bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE
Mar 19, 2008, 01:11 PM
A.t.t.i.t.u.d.e.

Work on it hun.

When you post a 'Hi I'm 16 and think I might be pregnant' people are automatically going to start questioning because... uh... you are 16. Please be prepared to hear the worst of it.

I did answer your question (above) so take a look if you haven't.

this8384
Mar 19, 2008, 01:27 PM
You need to take a step back. You came on here looking for advice. The bottom line is that no matter what you think, you are not ready. I don't care if you've got more money than Paris Hilton and Donald Trump put together; money doesn't equal happiness or maturity. You and your boyfriend are not ready for a child, and your last post very obviously reflected that.

If you don't want to hear what people have to say, then don't come to an advice board.

jessy0428
Mar 19, 2008, 01:31 PM
There is no other way to tell this early , you really need to wait until a missed period. And let me tell you raising a baby is NOT EASY!! I had my daughter when I was seventeen , I had just turned 17 a month before I got pregnant. Me and my husband(now) had been together for 2 yrs and had our own place , great jobs and money saved. And I had raised my cousin since she was a baby and I thought I was ready but when it is your own it is totally different. There is no one to hand them off to when it is 2 o clock in the morning and the baby has been crying for 3 or 4 hours straight and you don't know what's wrong. I didn't get to finish high school . You need to be financially stable and emotionally ready. It is not something you up into because you THINK you are ready. It is a very hard road and once you have a baby you can't change your mind when it gets to tough. My little girl is 2 now and it is still hard. My and my husband have been together for 4 yrs.And you need to realize that not all boys are going to stay and take care of their responsibilities.I don't get to go out because no matter what they tell you "your friends" don't want to hang out with a baby. So before you go and do something that is going to change your life FOREVER, think about what it really takes and if you are REALLY ready. Also think about the baby it deserves to be able to have a great life and parents that can take care of them.

BabyyGiirl2010
Mar 19, 2008, 02:07 PM
OK, I appreciate the people who are actually giving me advice, not the one's who are telling me all this like what I should and shouldn't be doing.

I alrede know how hard it is, I raised 2 little girls since they were born. I was up all night with them, and very little help from siblings so yes, I know how hard it is. And I am already talking to my mom about getting a tudor whenever I can do school after the baby. The baby sleeps a lot when they are newborn so I will have that time to get work done.

Thanks for the people who actually helped!

BabyyGiirl2010
Mar 19, 2008, 02:08 PM
And by the way, I already know what I'm doing after the baby is born if I am really pregnant, I just needed advice on the pregnancy thing!

bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE
Mar 19, 2008, 02:14 PM
Ask away!

What would you like to know?

BabyyGiirl2010
Mar 19, 2008, 02:24 PM
Ummm, I don't really know right now, I'm still fired up from all these people trying to tell me what I should and shouldn't be doing lol

Like I want to know what's going to go on during the pregnancy and like how bad pains should be if any at all you know?

bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE
Mar 19, 2008, 02:28 PM
Go to Boarders or Barnes and Noble and get this book:

What To Expect When You're Expecting by Arlene Eisenberg, Heidi Murkoff and Sandy Hathaway.

I have heard nothing but good things about this book.

this8384
Mar 19, 2008, 02:30 PM
No one can tell you exactly what's going to happen during pregnancy because everyone is different. I was a month pregnant before I found out because I never once got morning sickness, even though many women do. I also never got stretch marks, even though many women do.

As for the pain: the contractions feel like very strong menstrual cramps, but nothing in the world is going to feel as painful as delivery. I had an epidural which works great, for awhile. It numbs you really well so you don't feel your contractions, but it doesn't do anything for delivery. You feel yourself stretching so much that you cannot fathom how your body will ever be the same. You feel the baby coming down the birth canal. Once that baby starts to come out, you feel E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G.

margarita_momma
Mar 19, 2008, 02:54 PM
This8384 is right about the fact that every woman is different during pregnancy. I had my son at 19. (I can't believe you are even thinking of getting pregnant at your age but whatever) I had Pre-Eclampsia during my pregnancy. It is caused by extremely high blood pressure. I had horrible morning sickness during the first 4 months. The Pre-E started around my 6th month. I had to go on bedrest right before I turned 7 months. My ankles swelled to the size of grape fruits. I gained 30 extra pounds from water retention. I couldn't move without my heart rate going out of control and my blood pressure would go so high I that I kept passing out. I was admitted to the hospital 3 times during that month and almost lost him. I couldn't even get up to go pee without someone there to catch me if I blacked out. My son was born a month early with wet lungs. He stopped breathing after they did my emergency c-section. They had to resucitate him twice. He had to spend 3 1/2 weeks in the NICU. His medical bills totaled over $165,000 that we are still paying on because I didn't have insurance. That's not including the $25,000 of mine for the c-section and the constant doctor's visits because of my condition. We will probably be paying on that for the rest of our lives. He is a healthy happy 3 year old now but you never know what to expect during a pregnancy. Just read the book the above lady suggested. It was my bible while I was pregnant.

One more question though... don't you want to go to college, have a career, be able to afford your own house and not depend on your boyfriend and parents for everything? I am just having a hard time believing at 16 you want a child.

jessy0428
Mar 19, 2008, 02:58 PM
Every Pregnancy is different. Labor sucks. I was 6 mons pregnant before I found out I was pregnant because I had no symptoms and then it all hit at once and gained 60 lbs. Don't listen to the eating for two. You will gain a lot more weight then you want to . I had to have a c - section because I was in labor (drug free) for 15 hours and never dilated(sp) . My water broke on its own.Every pregnancy is going to be different and every women will experience different symptoms. Just make sure you go to the doctor and take care of yourself and the baby if you are in fact pregnant.And other then labor you should not have a lot of pain if you do then contact your doctor and if you have a lot of bleeding contact your doctor.

squeaks77
Mar 19, 2008, 03:17 PM
If you don't like the advice some people give go talk to your mommy who will tell you everything is all right and some whiney 16 year old who can't spell is ready for a baby.

Otherwise just tell people thank you, but I don't agree. It's still advice even if you don't like it. I hope to all the Gods you aren't, all we need are more welfare babies!

BabyyGiirl2010
Mar 19, 2008, 03:44 PM
Ummm, yes I do plan to finish high school and then go to college, I'm only going to a 2 year college because that's as long as my major takes, and he is going to have most of the money like while I would be pregnant and such and then when I am able to go to work I would do so. My parents on the other hand, my mom doesn't want me to move out lol she says she is going to keep me here as long as she can and do everything in her power to keep me here lol

She's going to be a lot of help, but I don't plan on depending on anyone for things except for support! And I will look for the book!
Thanks for the help

Synnen
Mar 19, 2008, 03:52 PM
You DO realize that your boyfriend's military insurance won't cover you at ALL if you aren't married, right? And that your parent's insurance has no obligation to cover any of the baby's medical bills?

And oh god... I changed my mind. You know so much. I hope you are blessed with a very aware baby that never needs to sleep.

J_9
Mar 19, 2008, 03:56 PM
I know you don't want to hear what has been said, but you HAVE to. It is necessary that you know that not all babies sleep a lot when they are first born, it's important that you know that even managers at McDonalds need high school diplomas and some even need 2 years of college these days. It's imperative you know that it will cost over a quarter of a million dollars to raise a child from infancy to age 17, and that does not include college OR if there are any problems with the birth or the baby.

Okay now, from a medical perspective, I am a nurse intern in Labor and Delivery at my local hospital. First of all it's IMPOSSIBLE to tell if you are pregnant so soon. It takes roughly 3 - 5 days for the sperm to travel up the vaginal canal through the uterus and up the fallopian tube where it is fertilized. Then it takes another 3 or so days to travel back down the fallopian tube into the uterus where it implants. Now, it's going to take another week or so before there is enough pregnancy hormone called hCG to be manufactured by the zygote (fertilized egg) to be detected by a pregnancy test. So it's WAY too early to test now.

Next, I see teens all the time in Labor and Delivery. Do you know the potential life threatening consequences to you and/or baby if you are pregnant it 16 years of age?

Cephalopelvic disproportion - means babies head is bigger than your pelvis and baby could get stuck in the birth canal... if this is the case, then you risk having a child born with cerebral palsy which is a medical condition that is NOT curable and does not have a long life expectancy... this will cost millions of dollars with doctors and therapists, medications and surgeries.

Now you have PIH - Pregnancy Induced Hypertension. That means pregnancy causes high blood pressure. High blood pressure can cause damage to your kidneys and heart. This is permanent damage. If the blood pressure gets high enough you have seizures, this is called eclampsia and requires an emergency delivery of the baby no matter how far along you are in your pregnancy. If you are 7 months along, baby gets delivered and may or may not live. Baby will spend months in NICU (neo-natal intensive care unit)... this can cost close to a million dollars after a few months. Baby may or may not be mentally retarded due to being born so young.

Hun, you may think you are ready, and I'm not trying to criticize you, I am trying to show you what I see on a weekly basis in the hospital with young ladies such as yourself. Your body is not physically ready to carry a child yet. You are still a child yourself.

BabyyGiirl2010
Mar 19, 2008, 04:10 PM
Well thank you for all your advice, but if I am pregnant there's nothing I ca do after that. But if I'm not then me and my boyfriend already decided to wait until after I graduate so yea that's pretty much it.

I'm getting off here cause I have to go back to school tomorrow it's the last day before spring break, and I have to get make up work because I've been getting sick a lot
But thanks for all your help!
Bye
<3 Ashley

Alty
Mar 19, 2008, 05:08 PM
Can I just say that if you are pregnant and you have this baby, the odds are you will be on this site next year telling kids, and that's what you are, a kid, just like you to wait.

There's nothing I can say, all the advice has already been given, and the person who gave you the best advice was ignored by you. Just my opinion.

Good luck, if you're pregnant you're going to need it.

jessy0428
Mar 19, 2008, 05:14 PM
I hope your not pregnant. I may only be 20 but I have experience. Get your high school diploma, get a great job and a house and a car , get married and then bring a baby into this world. And fyi not all newborns sleep all the time most of them cry all the time. Make a future for yourself and your future kids to come.And if you want something to take care of get a puppy!!

honestlysweet86
Mar 19, 2008, 10:34 PM
Hey

Look I'm not going to lecture you, but I def. agree that you are way, way too young. I am 21 and I got pregnant in November. It was unplanned but I live with my fiancé and we are getting married next year and so I was all ready to do the right thing. However I had a miscarriage in January (and almost 1 in 5 pregnancies end in miscarriage and they say that number could be way higher like 1/2) and I was NOT emotionally prepared for that. You say you are ready but you have no idea. The emotional effects of a miscarriage are awful. And if I were 16, there is no way I could have dealt with the emotional pain. I still think that I am even very young and I'm 5 years older than you! Trust me nothing in life goes according to plan and you could miscarry or you could not but you are so young and like J9 said, you could have comlications that will scar you for life. But I know you are going to do what you want no matter what any of us say. So for you I say goodluck and I def. think you need to grow up a bit before you do this.

bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE
Mar 20, 2008, 05:49 AM
Every Pregnancy is different. Labor sucks. I was 6 mons pregnant before I found out I was pregnant because I had no symptoms and then it all hit at once and gained 60 lbs. Dont listen to the eating for two. You will gain a lot more weight then you want to . I had to have a c - section because I was in labor (drug free) for 15 hours and never dilated(sp) . My water broke on its own.Every pregnancy is going to be different and every women will experience different symptoms. Just make sure you go to the doctor and take care of yourself and the baby if you are in fact pregnant.And other then labor you should not have a lot of pain if you do then contact your doctor and if you have a lot of bleeding contact your doctor.

You must've known something was up after 6 months of no period right?

jessy0428
Mar 20, 2008, 05:58 AM
You must've known something was up after 6 months of no period right?
No not really. I was on birth control and had a little bleeding every month up until the 5 th and that's when I took the test . It was not normal bleeding. I didn't gain any weight or have any symptoms. I really wish I would have known because I was on birth control and taking diet pills. But she is beautiful and healthy , so I got lucky. But no I really did not know.lol

bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE
Mar 20, 2008, 07:39 AM
Did the bleeding during those 5 months act like a period? Did you bleed regulary for five days with the same flow?

J_9
Mar 20, 2008, 08:07 AM
Apparently this tread is taking on a whole new twist. :rolleyes:

Shall we stay on topic please? We can start a totally different thread regarding the phenomenon about not knowing you are pregnant until late in pregnancy, it happens all the time.

kp2171
Mar 20, 2008, 10:40 AM
Thank God I didn't get what I wanted with all my heart at 16, or even 21.

soon2bemommy2008
Mar 26, 2008, 12:06 PM
I know it's been a while since anyone posted but I am new on here and saw this and thought I could comment... I am 19 and pregnant with my first. Trust me, if I could go back in time I would take it back... the father was abusive and now I will be raising this baby on my own... thank god for my parents :-) but I have had a difficult pregnancy so far... I am on a form of bedrest and I am only 24 weeks along! I will be on this bedrest, or 100% bedrest the rest of my pregnancy. I can't blame you for wanting a baby, they are absolutely amazing and I wish you luck if you are pregnant. I have no room to judge you, since I am so young myself. Good luck :-)

BabyyGiirl2010
Mar 27, 2008, 08:12 AM
Hey everyone... im not pregnant... I got my period lol
Now I'm going to get the book one of the people were talking about on here before I try, which will be after I graduate!

Thanks bye
<3 Ashley

JudyKayTee
Apr 5, 2008, 07:06 AM
[QUOTE=BabyyGiirl2010]Hey everyone... im not pregnant... I got my period lol
Now I'm going to get the book one of the people were talking about on here before I try, which will be after I graduate!



Seems that this thread is over but, anyway, in some States at 16 she cannot consent to having sex and the boyfriend would be out of the Military and in jail while she supports the child.