I am looking for the guy that I can spend mylife with, someone that will treat me like a lady, respect me, love me 4 who I am and not take me for granted. Someone that if he does not see me, he just want to call or jump on the next bus that is availabele, someone that I can love and would love me unconditionally, someone that will not play game with me or my mind. The questions is how do I get this type of a person, do they exit and if they do, how do you know if you have found him.

I think you can start by being the person you described, until then you're unlikely to meet your counterpart.

Everything you listed is attainable, but first you have to BE those things. You must take the time to confidently know you are a person deserving of a faithful, mature, low-drama relationship.

Once you know you can offer those things to a mate, you date. I don't believe in "the one", I believe in "types of people" and "levels of maturity"... my response is based on my belief, so let's not debate about that.

The reason you date is to "discover" who this person you're already attracted to really is. You might even feel like your falling in love. Your feelings are usually uncontrollable, so you really must learn to put them in their place. They should not govern you. They motivate you to investigate and learn and attempt to bond with someone, but your intelligence and good judgements are in charge of the actual commitment process.

While dating, everyone is on their best behavior at first. Sure, some of that is real, but I suggest you enjoy that period without believing TOO quickly. It takes time for familiarity and comfort to set in. Why is this important?

Well, it's a sad truth that we save our worst behaviors for the people we are closest to. Isn't that just grand? Well, actually it is. If you hang out with someone long enough, the courting behavior ends and they begin to treat you like they would naturally, and THAT is when you really start to pay attention.

Guys can keep up the "courting" behavior for a very long time, especially if there is no sex involved. So that means you need to be willing to invest a good 12-18 months before you can absolutely believe the man you're dating is who he presents himself to be. You are learning who he is by his actions, how you're treated, how you're honored, how you're beliefs/morals are defended by him... or not.

Ultimately, you decide that you're with "one of the right ones" when your relationship has stood the test of TIME (usually well over a year) and you are both seeking the same things. The feelings of "love" are important, but not critically so. It's far more important that you two have some big things in common OTHER than those uncontrollable feelings.

Good relationships have the same ups and downs as everyone else, what makes them good is that there is so much common ground outside your feelings, you have a solid foundation to stand on during those rocky periods when your feelings aren't all good anymore. That's the glue that binds.

Loving unconditionally, that's a "god thing" and always great to strive for. But unconditional love can also be "stupid love". By that I mean the one you love unconditionally may not be compatible with you at all, but your unconditional love makes you allow this bad match to stay and ruin your heart, your life, and all your prospects for a real good love with someone else. All of this is possible with unconditional love.

So, love with all your heart, even unconditionally, but don't STAY if it's clearly wrong. Moving on doesn't mean you didn't/don't love, it just means your smart enough to know love is not enough for permanence. Love gets the ball rolling, but it's the REAL you and him that establish a REAL substantive basis for a permanent relationship above those feelings.

Or you don't.

There will be a lot of attractions in your life, and men you will fall in love with. Some stronger than others. Let it happen. Then use the sense God gave you to relax, kip your wits about you, take the time for the real him to appear, then PAY ATTENTION. Go with what you discover. You don't need to change men into what you want. They seldom do change anyway. Honestly judge who they really are when they let it out, and move on or more closer base on THAT.

That's how you find Mr. Right. Also, you have to earn the place of Mrs. Right, too. Remember that your actions, not your words or your feelings, are what men (smart men) will ultimately base their choice on, as well. You need to be real. That means knowing who you are, what you like and don't like, what your goals, ambitions, world view, religion, politics are... all of these things come into play with the important guys. Don't lie about those things, don't misrepresent or hide them. They're all part of who YOU are and important to Mr. Right.