I'm all way fighting with my parnet . My mom the one who is really the one I get mad at I'm the oldest of 3kids but my moms having athoer baby. Me and my parnet fight all the time I talk back A lot and I know it but my and my mom are really stobborn. I get blamed for every thing ( lirtoley) now I've begged to hhave a pet for the longest time after my dog died we made a deal if I brought up my grades (wich I did) nowshe say no because she pregnant. So now that she pregante she even more hormannly and get mad sor every small thing and when she yell at my I yell right back now I'm always grounded and always mad now I'm taking it out on my friends I'm afiad il lose my frineds if I don't let out all this anger

Good evening riggid pin...
I want you to know as I begin this response, I am a mother and once you are a mother it's hard, almost impossible, to take off that hat, even when you answer a young one who you do not know. Though I just gave you that disclaimer I know what it's like when you butt heads with your mother. I remember those years well. However, I can only now appreciate what those years also taught me. My mother was wrong and you know what, yours might be wrong to.

However, you need to take a step back, a deep breath, inhale... exhale, and now try to hear me for a second. You still have to respect your mother. I disagreed with mine all the time but I never disrespected her. I never yelled or spoke back in a raised tone. My mother was not having another child you knew it was her way or the back of her hand. I was the only one who spoke my mind, in a respectful way, and my stubbornness didn't allow me to back down. Needless to say, I was always in hot water.

You know what? This stubborn streak taught me some tough lessons as well as good ones. Yours can to. You should keep that side of you, don't lose it. Just learn to use it without disrespecting her. The positive side, you will grounded much less, yelled at fewer times and not lose any friends. When you can learn to harness that stubborn streak you will turn into a wonderful young adult.

Let me give you an example. I am stubborn. I'm also an over achiever and a perfectionist. A few not so good qualities but that's another story. Anyway, the positive of those qualities was that as a stubborn female, over achiever I learned early that I had to use that or I wuld be eaten alive in Corporate America. I needed to be perceived as tough as any man, especially with a male dominant career coupled with management. So I had to be perceived as tough, tougher than I was underneath. So I did, and I continued to move up and on. Those qualities separate of themselves are not as bad, mixed together oh boy..

So you see I took a mix of not so good qualities to may advantage and it paid off. I love where I am now. I have respect from these tough guys and I live in Boston, nothing is easy. I respect them which was key. I learned that lesson from my mother (the mean one) I'm still a woman, I'm still weak under this armour, I'm still as emotional as any female (and I'm not pregnant) I still want to always get my way, and I can assure you that I get mad!

Try to ease up on your mom a bit. It's hard to have 3 children that are older and find out another is on the way. She might be an awful woman but she is a mother, and that job is tough riggid pin. We are not always right, but all of us mom's have one thing in common, we love our babies (and yes, you are still one of those babies) I had my youngest son in an unexpected way, but painfully I also lost him in another unexpected way. So please try to learn to respect her even if you don't understand her right now.

Someday soon you will get a chance to move out and you might be surprised how the world looks through those eyes. All I ask is that you put down the idea that you know it all right now, and that your mother is doing the best she can. She had you and that alone is a gift, she knew she was blessed with. You are her baby and you always will be. Try to ease up on her she needs that from you, her oldest, okay? If you can learn to do that, it will get better.

Chillax.. What can you are your parents possible fight about? I understand they told you that when you kept your grades up that you can get a pet however they didn't know that they would be having a baby. Yes it seems unfare but they don't need to look after a newborn and a dog. Who is going to look after your dog while you are in school? Don't agrue with your parents they will always be right even when they are actually wrong. You teenagers don't have to put up with this you can always get a job, apartment, move in with guy be and have all the pets you want.

Seriously, your parents love you and only want the best for you and sometime you don't see it.

So just chill out... you kids still say chill. I feel old.

Chuckling here in Boston... Chill out? Is that what they say? My son just told me they say quit buggin? I don't know but we must be getting old, really old.

However, he does not say that to me because he knows this simple truth; This family is not a Democracy, we are a Dictatorship and guess who that might be? So though I try to run a tight ship, we have a mutual respect for each other, as does my daughter.

Besides, as parents we know your going to blame us anyway for why you are in therapy as an adult, so we try our best not to fail you in that regard.

Thank but my mom not a awaful women but we have the pernaltiy so it really hard to get along

I am delighted to hear you type that because it means you can see that and appreciate it. It's tough at the age you are and we all understand that. I don't think anybody wants to minimize your frustrations with your mom, but rather show you ways to deal with it. It's tough when you add pregnancy to us, already way too emotional females.

You can get through this, I know you can. Please just try to understand that as parents you guys do not coming with an owners manual. It's tough to raise you, mistake free. She is experiencing your years for the first time. And trust me when I say, she's lost. I know I am but I continue to learn from my children, as they continue to learn from me.

Hang in there riggid pin. When you think you are about snap back at your mother, take a deep breath in and repeat after me... Serentity now.. serenity now. If you do not know what I mean look up that word because you will need for your entire adult life, trust me. That little remark comes from Seinfeld (a God-like symbol, to us old folk)