Ok I have been having this same problem for about a year now and although I KNOW this relationship is not right and he will never change I just cannot let him go for the life of me.. Somtimes I think that there is something wrong with me I mean why would I want to be unhappy and keep going back to this man over and over and over again.I swear its like he is my drug.

Since the last time I posted a lot has been going on and yes if I had gone no contact all this heartache could have been avoided and I probably would feel better by now but I just can't do it!I go for a little while but always end up seeing him and every time I think OK that's it its over for ever something happens again. He is the first guy who I have dated who has treated me like this and kind of caught me by surprise as I thought relationships were always good, naiive I know but I have always had positive experiences..

So the story is:

Soo complicated but basically we broke up. He said he doesn't love me (still maintains this) which sucks as he said he did than took it back!Anyway I started seeing someone else, so did he. Both relationships did not work out. Every time he sees me dancing/flirting with another guy he completely looses it with jelousy yet he doesn't want to be together. BUT a few weeks ago we ended up sleeping together (which was weird because it was the first time we ever did it and we were together for a year) After that things seemed to change he said he wasn't going to see anyone else and hopes that I won't either.

If someone says that to you would you not think that you are going out? I mean come on, he also said we would do something on valentines day. But anyway he ended up having to work and I was pissed about this because he was being real mean about the whole thing then ended up saying I'm making a drama out of the situation when all I suggested was we meet up another night to celebrate instead. He also said he never told me we were going out? More confusion, than I asked him so are we together or not and he says "its up2 u" omg! Well then we had a fight and he was txting me yesterday (vday) asking me where this party was that I was going to but didn't end up coming.

Please give your thoughts on the whole situation. Please don't tell me to go no contact because that is what I should do but lets face it that hasn't worked and I doubt that it will.. Any other suggestions??

You said...
" I KNOW this relationship is not right and he will never change "
" if i had gone no contact all of this could be avoided and i'd probably feel better by now"
" he said he doesnt love me and still maintains this"

Get away from him now! And stop telling yourself you'll never get over him. You WILL let him go, and you WILL move on. You just need to show some courage and do it.
You said he is your drug, so take some drug rehab and get clean of him!

Please give your thoughts on the whole situation. Please don't tell me to go no contact because that is what I should do but lets face it that hasn't worked and I doubt that it will.. Any other suggestions??

It has never worked, because you have never tried it. So now you want the easy way out? The magic pill? Come on, life is not like that, so make up your mind, if you want to keep suffering doing it your way?? Or go through the process the right way, by taking a few suggestions. If you want to heal, and get your mental health back, do not contact the right way. As you have been told before, many times, by many people.

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/confused-about-me-ex-what-should-do-170398.html

Just for those that don't know the whole story.

Yes but how can I do no contact when he calls/txts me and we go to the same university, have the same friends hang out at the same places and we are both the same nationality living overseas so everyone sort of knows each other within the community and it is just inevitable that I WILL see this person.. Mix that with the fact that I'm still totally in love with him and it makes it a million times harder not to see him. For me to go no contact would mean changing my whole life and I guess that's why its been so hard

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/how-break-up-survive-101-use-you-wish-114179.html

Check this out, and let us know if it helps.

Ok I have decided to try no contact.Argh its just so hard but I have to be strong! Its all my fault I keep winding up in this same emotional place I have to do something about it otherwise I'm going to drive myself crazy.And he doesn't even seem like it even bothers him that much I think he likes the idea of having me there but at the same time still keeping me at a distance if that makes sense. I have to be strong this time I'm going to be very busy in the next week and that's going to help I'm involved in many exciting things and hopefully that will help get my mind off him.. It just makes me so happy when we're together, the day before yesterday we were just in bed together cuddling and stuff getting on so well it makes me think that we could have something so great together !but than I text him yesterday and he never replied, than I saw him in the club and he was wondering why I wasn't talking to him and that I shouldn't get angry when he doesn't reply.. I guess It would be OK but I mean I'm not just some random right?Am I overreacting? I don't know and than some guy was trying to hook up with me and he was ready to go beat him up if I had asked him to. I think maybe I over analyze everything I don't know , all I know at this point is that I have to find a way to move on from this man! It helps to vent here also please if you guys have any thoughts on this let me know!

Thanks!:)

I think he keeps you feeling as if he has feelings and gives you enough to want more, but its obvious you feel stronger than he does, and he knows it. He is using your feelings against you and with all due respect, your letting him. The truth is you don't need him, as he does nothing for your happiness, unless he gets something out of it.