Me and my boyfrend, we have been going out for more than a year. And I always suspected that he smokes weed. And recently I found out some stuff in his ashtray and I told him that I know he is smoking weed and I showed him proof. But he said its not his and that its his cousine's and a frend's. So I called them up, and his cousine said its none of my business and his friend said that it was his stuff, not my boyfreind's.
I want to know if he is smoking weed. I want to find out. But how can I tell?

Purchase an at home drug testing kit. If you don't know him well enough to know if he is a druggie, what else do you not know about him? Dump him, just think, you could end up with a disease of some type(if he shares needles for example), or if you become married or pregnant your child could have birth defects. Dump the jerk if he refuses the test and do not let him know before hand that you are going to have him take the test. To me the refusal to take a drug test is the same as it coming back positive.

Mowerman is right, confront him with a test, if he refuses then you know what that means

1.If I dated someone and I could not be comfortable enough to share my do's and do nots, then I would dump them. Why does he feel like he would have to hide anything from you?

2. If I told someone that I did not smoke weed, drink, watch porn, pick my nose, snore, etc and they wanted to snoop and interrogate my family and friends, I would dump them.

3. If you asked me an adult that works and pays taxes to submit to your drug test, I would show you the door and probably get a restraining order against you.

4. What he does is his business, he does not have to tell you anything that he does not want to.. If you can't handle it, then get out. You'll be snooping forever over one thing or another. What type of a relationship or life is that.

Hello:

Bushg is RIGHT ON! This relationship will NEVER, NEVER work.

excon

If he said No that should be that. Isn't trust the foundation of any relationship? I wouldn't go to him with a home drug test cause you will probably be leaving with an empty cup and no boyfriend.

I basically agree with Bushg. The thing is most addicts (to whatever) make excuses, minimize, deny and even claim it is somebody else's. Then by the time you KNOW that you KNOW what you now know (months or years later) they have usually gotten worse with their addiction to the point they can no longer hide it and you have invested your time and your heart to someone that it won't work out with.
I thought I could deal with an addict because the only guy I ever really loved was an alcoholic and heroin addict. I have had two bfs since then and they both hid their addictions and I ended up leaving them over it because it ended up bad.
If you even suspect him of it you are probably better of without him.

dump him, just think, you could end up with a disease of some type(if he shares needles for example), or if you become married or pregnant your child could have birth defects. LOL! That's a bit extreme,
U can't get a disease from smoking pot at least as far as I know.
And I think you would be able to tell if he was using other drugs,
I don't know but I don't think weed isn't sucha big deal,
Its better for you than cigarettes
I would be more angry if he lied to you about it.

Anytime you feel like you can't trust someone, that is a red flag. You could ask him to take a drug test. He might do, probably won't. He might get angry and feel like you don't trust him.

I think it's important to listen to your intuition in relationships. Why did you suspect in the past? If you have had reason to suspect before, then found proof, then found a reason to doubt the story he told you, then it's not sounding good for him... I would say that if you feel like you can't trust what he says, then break things off. Because the trust issue will come up again and again, if not about this, than about something else. The bottom line is it just doesn't work when you can't trust the person.

That's just my 2 cents though! Not trying to sound like I'm telling you what to do or anything. :)

I don't think a drug test is necessary, whatever happened to talking plain and simple and agreeing on some terms?

You asked him if he did and he said no. If you don't trust him enough to accept his answer than you shouldn't be with him. I don't think it's an issue of whether he's doing drugs it's whether you trust him enough to accept his answer. Good luck.

I know that some people are more susceptible to addiction than others so nobody can claim marijuana is not addicting... Pepsi is even addicting yet not all Pepsi drinkers are addicted!

I know that the psychoactive chemicals in marijuana interfere with the balancing process that antidepressants work toward. Depression is a biochemical illness -- an imbalance in chemicals in the brain. Antidepressants help things become better balanced, but they can't if one is smoking marijuana. Which many people who take antidepressants and other psychotropic drugs DO smoke marijuana.

in the know zone - marijuana (http://www.intheknowzone.com/marijuana/brain.htm)

The affects of marijuana the brain's Anandamide, dopamine and other receptors

Marijuana causes some people to be paranoid.
(I have known some of them) LONDON (AP) - New findings on marijuana's damaging effect on the brain show the drug triggers temporary psychotic symptoms in some people, including hallucinations and paranoid delusions, doctors say.

British doctors took brain scans of 15 healthy volunteers given small doses of two of the active ingredients of cannabis, as well as a placebo.

One compound, cannabidiol, or CBD, made people more relaxed. But even small doses of another component, tetrahydrocannabinol, or THC, produced temporary psychotic symptoms in people, including hallucinations and paranoid delusions, doctors said.

Doctors: Pot Triggers Psychotic Symptoms (http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D8ORAMNO0&show_article=1)

Anandamide

In higher doses, marijuana can cause delusions, hallucinations, and impaired memory.

While marijuana use may seem like a soother to your girlfriend, she may need to know about the negative effects:

Addictive effects
Marijuana use affects dopamine, a neurotransmitter involved in the brain's pleasure producing or reward mechanism, which explains its potential for dependency.

Memory impairment
Marijuana use can negatively affect short-term memory, especially memories trying to be recovered during the time when one was using this drug.

Amotivational syndrome
Since testosterone levels are temporarily lowered, users of marijuana don't feel like doing much besides eating and hanging out with the small group of friends with which they are most comfortable.

Disease
Long-term marijuana use can cause irreversible changes in both male and female reproductive organs, such as lowered sperm count in men and altered shape of the uterus in women. Lung cancer, emphysema, and lowered immune system responses, such as decreased white blood cell count, could also result from extended marijuana use.

Mental health
Marijuana appears to increase the risk of developing depression and/or schizophrenia the more that one uses it.

This last negative effect should serve as a red flag, as your girlfriend believes that she is self-medicating, when she may be contributing to her depression. Her depression could manifest itself in the future, since marijuana users typically withdraw from social situations, adding to depression.

Also consider what it is about antidepressants that are so abhorrent to your girlfriend. Why would marijuana, an illegal substance, be preferable to a controlled medication taken under medical advisement to manage her stress and depression? These are issues you, as someone who cares for her, could explore with her. At the least, she may agree to see her medical or primary care provider for a medical exam and evaluation. If she then has a diagnosis of depression and/or anxiety, or is referred to someone who specializes in working with people with these conditions, then chances are she will feel better than when she "prescribes" marijuana for herself.

Perhaps if you share this information with your girlfriend, showing your caring and concern, she may see that there are healthier, legal ways to manage her stress. If you suggest that she visit a mental health care provider, you could offer to go with her, so that she gets the help and/or medication that she needs and deserves.

Go Ask Alice!: Marijuana: Does it produce serotonin? (http://www.goaskalice.columbia.edu/3438.html)

Marijuana's Adverse Effects -- familydoctor.org (http://familydoctor.org/online/famdocen/home/common/addictions/drugs/485.html)

I'm confused by NOhelp's response. Is it the girlfriend or the boyfriend who may or may not smoke pot?

Either way, I think that NOhelp's response is a bit over stated, but it is also the way our society works these days. There is a great tendency to always look at the extreme end of the negative side of issues. NOhelp mentioned that Pepsi can be addictive. I guess mashed potatoes can be addictive to some people, as well. But, if we are talking about chemical addiction, the caffeine in Pepsi is the culprit. If you check Wiki for caffeine Caffeine - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caffeine) you will find a list of cautions that sound as dangerous as the list above for marijuana.

In my adult life, I have never lived around marijuana users. Not a choice, just the way it worked out. I've known several (who were willing to admit it) and they were fully functioning folks. I have lived around many alcohol users and some used it more than they needed to at times. Still, they were/are functional members of society. I don't see much difference between the two in day-to-day jobs.

The job I'm talking about requires a government security clearance. Years ago, an investigator told me that marijuana use was NOT a disqualifier for a clearance. That surprised me. He said that marijuana use was so prevalent in our society, investigators considered anyone claiming never to have used it suspicious. Unfortunately, I'm one of those guys. I plan to change this after retirement. BTW, while PAST use of a controlled substance is not a cause for loss of a clearance, current or continuing use most definitely is.

We get lots of choices in today's world. Some/most choices have down a side. In a free society, one gets to make those choices and live with the consequences. I think this is tougher to do these days because of negative information.

It appears to me that on balance, if someone can post info on a subject, the general tendency is to focus on the negative end or a range of information. This may because we are far more litigious as a society than we have been in the past. I guess that is a different subject.

Back to the original question. Good relationships are built on trust. This doesn't sound like a good relationship.

I plan to change this after retirementHello rod:

Cool - then there's hope for you. Let me know when that is, and we'll fire one up.

excon

Weed affects how a person functions! That IS a fact.

Loss of Memory
Loss of Motivation
Cancer causing (4 times worse than a filtered cigarette)
Affects driving ability
Premature babies and low birth weight
Temporary loss of fertility
Increases heart rate up to 50 percent

If this were such a 'relaxing' and 'okay to use' drug, than why so many negatives? And I wonder why it is illegal? Hmmmm... GROW UP!

Hello again brunette,

Let's take 'em one at time.

Weed affects how a person functions - No argument there. It's a drug.

Loss of Memory – Yes, your short term memory is affected…. What was the question?

Loss of Motivation – Pot doesn't do that. People lose motivation. Drugs fill in the gaps.

Cancer causing (4 times worse than a filtered cigarette) – Just not true. If it was four times worse than cigarettes, cigarettes kill about a half million people a year in this country alone. If pot was 4 times worse, that would mean that 2 million people die from pot here every year. Of course, we know that ain't happening.

The TRUTH is, nobody ever died from smoking pot.

Affects driving ability – no argument there. It IS a drug.

Premature babies and low birth weight - Nahh

Temporary loss of fertility – Nahh again.

Increases heart rate up to 50 percent – Nahh even again.

If this were such a 'relaxing' and 'okay to use' drug, than why so many negatives? - Compared to drink or cigarettes, pot has few negatives. It IS a drug, however. Consequently, it isn't “ok” to use.

And I wonder why it is illegal? Hmmmm... – It's illegal because the dufus's in congress believe the same crap you do.

GROW UP! – I am growed up. Been smoking the herb for 40 years and I ain't dead yet. Look. I don't think kids should smoke pot. But, lying to 'em ain't the answer. Now, I know you believe the stuff you said. But, that's because you've been lied to too.

excon

Hi excon- Although I will not and cannot condone the use of any kind of illegal drug I will say that I don't think smoking pot once in a while is all that bad. If it becomes a daily habit than I would worry because my experience (not me) has been that once you start daily use the effects wear off and that's when a person will most likely start using harder stuff so that they can get that high, that would be my main worry.

Is pot addictive? Yes, and I'm sitting here at 8:00 in the morning drinking my 3rd cup of coffee (I'd die if I didn't get it, really!) I'm also a smoker (trying to quite because I don't want to die of something I could have prevented and both my non-smoking parents died of cancer, no russian roulette for me). There are lots of addictive substances out there that are not illegal. I think that in general pot isn't that bad for you, but like anything else the more you use it the worse it can be.

Just my opinion.

Whatever you say excon, just know when the day your a** gets busted for weed, there will be no mercy for you here.

Prove that is doesn't affect motivation, memory, driving, fertility... prove that no one has died from it and no one has gotten cancer. Maybe I will reconsider what I believe then.

... And maybe I have morals...

'Premature babies and low birth weight - Nahh

Temporary loss of fertility – Nahh again.'


It could cause it. No furthur argument.

Hello again, Alt & beautiful:

Beautiful stole my message... I was about to say, the most dangerous thing about using pot is the threat of going to jail. She is right on about that.

However, in MY case, I live in Washington and I have a prescription for medical marijuana. So, I don't need no stinkin mercy, thank you very much. She'll be happy to know, however, that because it's medicine, I promise not to enjoy it.

Beautiful, there's enough information out there to fill volumes. You can go to drugfacts.org and it'll tell you what I said. Or you can go to DEA.gov and hear what you want to hear.

I'm not here to convince you, beautiful. I'm just here to tell the truth.

excon

excon-Well I'll give you the benefit of the doubt, especially considering that you've been smoking it for longer than I've been alive (sorry, low blow). I do know that marijuana can be very helpful when dealing with pain from cancer, ms and a number of other illnesses. You have to wonder why they would prescribe something if it was really that terrible.

Beautiful-Once again, not condoning the use of any illegal drugs, but don't judge everyone based on what you read, even the most addictive things have their uses.

*Sigh* I don't even know the truth anymore.

What is right? What is wrong? It is all in a matter of opinion I suppose.

I grew up in a household where weed or any illegal drug for that matter was prohibited and one would see the worse if used.

But then again, isn't that like that in most households?

Excon, I agree and disagree. Your use of marijuana is acceptable due to health conditions. Children aspiring to become something in their lives should not, but are introduced to drugs. Cigarettes, alcohol, shrooms, acid, ectasy, heroin etc... yea we all know the effects. Why we harm our bodies in doing so? I don't know.

Altenweg- I am basing my opinion on my expierences, not what I read. Right back at you!

Weed affects how a person functions! That IS a fact.

Loss of Memory
Loss of Motivation
Cancer causing (4 times worse than a filtered cigarette)
Affects driving ability
Premature babies and low birth weight
Temporary loss of fertility
Increases heart rate up to 50 percent

If this were such a 'relaxing' and 'okay to use' drug, than why so many negatives? And I wonder why it is illegal? Hmmmm... GROW UP!


Sounds like you are basing your opinion on what you read, and I don't necessarily disagree with you, I am saying to keep an open mind. I am not a pot smoker, but I'd be lying if I said I've never tried it. Pot is not something that I want as part of my life, heck I don't want to smoke anymore either (it's not easy to quite). As for my coffee, touch it and be prepared to lose a finger:p

I will say this, both my parents died of cancer, my father less that two weeks after his diagnosis, my mother 10 months after hers. My mothers doctor prescribed marijuana to her for the pain. I took care of my mother for the last 5 months of her life, she lived with me and my husband and my then 2 1/2 year old son, I saw what cancer did to her and the pain she lived with everyday. I made her "smoke" outside (because I didn't want my son around pot no matter what the medicinal value of it was) and I saw it help her through the pain . Until you've walked a mile in someone's shoes, don't be so quick to judge.

Hello again, beautiful:

I think you need to read the things I'm saying here a little more closely. I think you're missing some important distinctions that I make.

Nobody is advocating drug use, least of all me. Nobody is advocating breaking the law, least of all me. And especially, nobody is advocating that children smoke pot, least of all me.

However, telling the truth about a drug isn't advocating its use. In fact, if you want to reduce the use of a drug, the way to do that would BE to tell the truth about it. Certainly lying about it isn't working.

Drug use isn't GOOD. It isn't something people should do. Taking smoke in and out of your body isn't a GOOD thing.

But, lying about drugs to make you stop is TERRIBLE.

excon

Again I will say, I base my opinion on my life expierences.

I have walked along side someone's shoes.

My hands aren't lily white either. Yes, I have expieremented with it, but it was the effect on me and other's as well that formed my opinion.

Believe it or not, I am a coffee and cigarette queen, so someone please preach to me?

Hey Alt, how many cups and butts a day? We might have something in common : )

I'm not perfect but I know what I believe in.

Hello excon,

I don't believe I am lying, if that is what you are saying. Not all of those said symptoms can effect everyone, but a darn good percentage of them do.

Beautiful- I drink at least 6 cups of coffee a day (only in the morning though) with sugar and milk. I have two kids and have to start my day very early to get them to school so coffee is a godsend. As to smoking, I'm cutting down daily, I am now at 1/2 a pack a day and will cut that in half starting next week. I didn't smoke through either of my pregnancies and actually quite for 4 years starting when I found out I was pregnant with my son. I started smoking again the day after I found out my mother was terminal. Quite again when I was pregnant with my daughter, started again when she was 6 months old. I smoke outside because I don't want my children to be exposed to second hand smoke. I am not perfect, I have many flaws, it makes life more interesting:) . I'm sure we do have allot in common, even if we don't always agree I will always try to respect you point of view.

Beautiful,

"Prove that is doesn't affect motivation, memory, driving, fertility...prove that no one has died from it and no one has gotten cancer. Maybe I will reconsider what I believe then."

In all due respect, proving a negative is not a research topic anyone is willing to fund. I could probably do a study that "suggested" that Twinkies did all those things if taken in sufficient quantities, but it would be meaningless. One can show correlation with those effects, but I don't think that is what we've been debating. You can't prove what you are suggesting.

It appears to me you have had a bad experience with someone over pot. I haven't had that experience, but as I said, I haven't really been around it. The pot laws we have, especially considering the lack of law on cigarettes and booze, are arbitrary. There is a pretty good book on the subject... "Reefer Madness: Sex, Drugs and Cheap Labor in the American Black Market" by Eric Schlosser.

(excon, if you haven't see it, I'm pretty sure you would enjoy it.)

When I get around to trying it, I'll probably go to one of the many countries where it is legal. Legality of cannabis - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legality_of_cannabis) I'll probably avoid the countries where one can be executed for it. Did I mention that the laws might be a bit arbitrary?

Oh, on the low birth weight, I certainly wouldn't attempt to refute that, but I suspect that some of those mothers had larger problems than smoking pot. We didn't know better in the '70s and my wife smoked and drank through the pregnancies of all my children. My son weighed 9 pounds 12 ounces, the lightest daughter was 7/15. My recent granddaughter weighed 9 pounds 15 ounces and my daughter was a straight arrow throughout her pregnancy. Given the difficulty of her delivery, we have jokingly said she should have smoked. I really think we are talking about extreme cases where smoking pot is piling on for there to be a serious impact, but we aren't supposed to take chances these days.

Bottom line: Individuals have to make the call after hearing and weighing the evidence.

Alt,

Cute bunny! So cuddley and furry... :) I believe my caffine intake can go anywhere from 3-5 cups a day, depending on the day. Cigarettes? Desperetely need to quit. I'm a little over half a pack, again depending on the day. I haven't had children but I know I will quit cigarettes when I become pregnant.

Rodandy,

Suggesting? So all of those 'drug facts' are wrong? They lied to us? Those bastards. Yes, I have had a bad experience with weed so I am going to act out the only way I know how. I'm sure if you had a bad experience on something, you wouldn't be voting for it. Though I make so called 'judgments' on the negatives of weed, I definently wouldn't alter my child's perception by pointing out the unharmful effects on it. Though you might defend it, what would you do if you saw your 11 year old lighting up a joint, in your house? Go on, tell me how wrong I am. Try to weave your way around answering what is right with this question.

Beautiful- That bunny is the youngest of my three bunny babies, named cotton (don't you think that's appropriate?) He is a big sucky baby. I also have two dogs a cockatiel, gold fish and a husband (ha,ha) not to mention my two kids. Yes, the house is full of human and fur babies.

My family and I used to breed rabbits. I can only remember thinking we had a rabbit farm. Can you imagine how big the hutch was? How much cleaning? Feeding? Nurturing? I can recall when my Dad had to put one of them 'down' and hearing that eerie gun shot. Naturally I fell in love with bunnies!

Before the big split, my family was pret-t-y big. We always had pets. 4 guines pigs, 3 dogs, 1 cat, 5 hamsters, 2 birds, 5 goldfish, 4 children (all girls) and my 2 parents. Yupp REALLY BIG! :)

Now back to the topic... :)

In my opinion, a4a5a6a7, and like others had posted, if there is no trust in the relationship then it isn't worth your time.

What part bothers you the most?

*The fact that you 'think' he lied about using the substance

Or

*The fact that he smokes it (or so you claim)

I still think that if she doesn't trust his answer to be the truth then the relationship isn't worth continuing either way. There can be no real relationship if there is no trust.

Very true!

Beautiful- It seems like we're the only ones left to debate this. Since I already know your views and you know mine I guess we have to wait until someone else posts. I would love to talk to you again, I'm sure we'll bump into each other on other posts. Until then fight the good fight and don't drop your coffee cup.:)

LOL! Never have and never will! Ditto!

Beautiful- One more thing, I took the liberty of adding you to my buddy list, hope that's okay. I'm signing off for a few hours. Chow.

Thank you!

Ok, first of all. Smoking weed will not give you a disease. You can't shoot weed up. Its actually a great way to relieve stress. I know someone who smoked weed their whole pregnancy and her baby is healthy as can be. Not that it's a good idea to do it. Him smoking weed and getting off in you will not harm you at all. If your against weed, maybe you should leave him. But whatever happens good luck!

So here is me again. I posted a question on February 14th (is he smoking weed?)
And I thank you all for your answers.
Since I'm going to relate my new question to the last one, I'll copy my last question here:
"me and my boyfrend, we have been going out for more than a year. and i always suspected that he smokes weed. and recently i found out some stuff in his ashtray and i told him that i know he is smoking weed and i showed him proof. but he said its not his and that its his cousine's and a frend's. so i called them up, and his cousine said its none of my business and his frend said that it was his stuff, not my boyfreind's. i want to know if he is smoking weed. i want to find out. but how can i tell?"

My new question is:
I asked my boyfriend what exactly they were smoking that day and he said that they don't smoke weed and that they always smoke hash oil. And in some odd way I think my boyfriend is with them in that. I know you guys would be picking on the trust thing again, but I don't mind. I just want to know is these symptoms relate to some who uses hashoil.

1. when we are out having a coffee, he'll receive a call, he'll mumble
Into the phone and he'll suddenly drop me home and he'll come pick
Me up after 1 hour and when he comes back:
2. his eyes are red shot,
3. he'll be in a better mood,
4. but he'll sweat,
5. he keeps smelling himself
6. he eats a lot
7. he laughs a lot
8. he has short temper and he recently beat me like hell when I threatened to show the end tubes of the cigarrattes I found in his ash tray to his mother. He looked so scary and he beat me everywhere
9. when his eyes are not red, he is pissed off
10. When his eyes are not red, he can't concentrate on anything I say
11. He keeps looking at the phone expecting someone to call
12. He got some bad rashes recently
I don't know there is a lot more... I don't want to think about it

Please help me identify...

Look drugs or no drugs... if the man beat the crap out of you... LEAVE HIM!! There is no other issue here. He BEAT you!! If you only care if he is on drugs (because that makes it better, right?)... he is on something (more than likely)! There is no way to tell exactly what, because most drugs have the same side effects/symptoms.

Take a look at what you are asking about... and he expects this to be better than smoking pot?? (google it... see for yourself what hash oil is... pretty bad stuff, I would think)

I am not trying to freak on you... it just kills me how any woman or girl can stand beside a man that even bows up or raises a hand towards her, much less hit or "beat" her. Respect... not even close to it. Leave the SOB and let some other person deal with him and his drug problems. PERIOD

I know he has done really bad things to me. But I just don't want to leave him, because I'm afraid I might not love anyone anymore. I don't think I can love again. This is the guy I love. But I'm not sure if I trust him. I hate myself for thinking that he is lying to me. But I'm pretty sure he does lie. But yet, I am still with him

a4: You are speaking of lust, not love.

If you truly "love" this guy... there would be no reason to distrust him. No true love would involve lying or cheating or beating your partner. Sorry, can you tell I am hung up on the fact that he HITS you?
I promise you... you will find another and another and another... AND SO ON! There are to many guys out there that will treat you like the lady you deserve to be treated. I would also suggest that you take the time to be by yourself... you sound scared of that. Find your true inner being before you try to learn someone else's. (I am sure you will find that you deserve better than this).
I am only speaking from experience here. If he IS using drugs, the beatings will get worse as he tires of that drug and goes for a stronger one.

1. when we are out having a coffee, he'll recieve a call, he'll mumble
into the phone and he'll suddenly drop me home and he'll come pick
me up after 1 hour and when he comes back:
2. his eyes are red shot,
3. he'll be in a better mood,
4. but he'll sweat,
5. he keeps smelling himself
6. he eats a lot
7. he laughs a lot
8. he has short temper and he recently beat me like hell when i threatened to show the end tubes of the cigarrattes i found in his ash tray to his mother. he looked so scary n he beat me everywhere
9. when his eyes are not red, he is pissed off
10. when his eyes are not red, he can't concentrate on anything i say
11. he keeps lookin at the phone expectin someone to call
12. he got some bad rashes recentlyHello again, a:

Are these the symptoms of hash oil use?? NO!

People who partake in the herb are not violent. They might tear up a bag of chitos, but not their girlfriend.

excon

Yep... sounds like something that is actually a drug... oops did I say that out loud? Lol

a4a5etc seems to be displaying battered spouse syndrome.

Don't worry, folks. Life is just fine as soon as daddy stops hitting.

You need to get away from this guy and get some help.

You've already found the "smoking gun." It's very convenient to blame it on visitors and friends. That's not to say that his cousin and friend haven't been doing it with him ; they probably have. But if you want some real telltale signs, look for these: mood swings/alternating feelings of fatigue and ecstacy, eating binges and subsequent weight gain, frequent phone calls or visits from strangers (especially at odd hours) and the telltale incense-like smell on his breath or lingering in his home or on his clothes.

raggablue agrees: although, as you already know, marijuana is not addictiveHave to disagree with this. Maybe it all depends on how one defines "addiction." But I've known many people who've totally screwed up their lives after starting with marijuana.

I know that some people are more susceptible to addiction than others so nobody can claim marijuana is not addicting... Pepsi is even addicting yet not all Pepsi drinkers are addicted!Very true, and this comment reflects a true understanding of the nature of addiction.
The affects of marijuana the brain's Anandamide, dopamine and other receptors

Marijuana causes some people to be paranoid.Very true as well.
Addictive effects
Marijuana use affects dopamine, a neurotransmitter involved in the brain's pleasure producing or reward mechanism, which explains its potential for dependency.

Memory impairment
Marijuana use can negatively affect short-term memory, especially memories trying to be recovered during the time when one was using this drug.

Amotivational syndrome
Since testosterone levels are temporarily lowered, users of marijuana don't feel like doing much besides eating and hanging out with the small group of friends with which they are most comfortable.

Disease
Long-term marijuana use can cause irreversible changes in both male and female reproductive organs, such as lowered sperm count in men and altered shape of the uterus in women. Lung cancer, emphysema, and lowered immune system responses, such as decreased white blood cell count, could also result from extended marijuana use.

Mental health
Marijuana appears to increase the risk of developing depression and/or schizophrenia the more that one uses it.All facts. Deny or argue with them as much as you want but these are the facts.

Long-term marijuana use can cause irreversible changes in both male and female reproductive organs, such as lowered sperm count in men and altered shape of the uterus in women. Lung cancer, emphysema......Hello again, cianci:

If marijuana causes lung cancer, you'd think some of those people would have died. As a matter of fact, if marijuana causes lung cancer LOTS of people would be dead as a result.

But, you can't find one. Not one. That's because marijuana doesn't cause lung cancer at all. It's just more government propaganda that lots of you buy into. Nobody every died from smoking pot. Nobody.

Nope. If your objective is to reduce marijuana use, lying about it won't do the trick. They've been trying that for 75 years..

excon

PS> I don’t mean YOU’RE lying, cianci. You’re a good person who’s simply been mislead.

Hello again:

There's a couple a pot posts going on right now, and I want to clear up some stuff.

Today, the good pot is home grown. It's not like the old days when home grown was what you smoked when you couldn't buy anything else. Nooooo, not at all. Today's homegrown pot is the most potent pot in the world. Chalk one up for American ingenuity and know how. Plus, no longer are we net importers. American dope is enjoyed worldwide. In fact, marijuana is America's biggest cash crop.

Ok, here comes the fact:

This homegrown pot has five to ten and maybe even 20 times the amount of TAR than a cigarette has.

Here comes the spin: Pot has more tar than tobacco does, ergo; it causes more cancer than cigarettes do.

But, that nexus is incorrect. Here's another fact: Tar doesn't cause lung cancer. NICOTINE does. Pot has no nicotine, and doesn't cause lung cancer.

That's not to say that ingesting smoke in and out of your lungs is GOOD. It's just to say that so far, it hasn't been proven to kill you.

Which brings up another subject. Because of the DEA prohibition, there's no study to confirm or deny what we're saying here. You'd think the government would WANT a study or two to back up its claims. You'd also think the government would like to know about the medical benefits of pot. But noooooo. The government isn't interested in facts. Because the last the time the government commissioned a study on pot, the commission recommended it be decriminalized. That happened during Nixon's era.

excon

Does anyone know the history behind the US pot laws?

Legal history of marijuana in the United States - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legal_history_of_marijuana_in_the_United_States)

The laws first started as an attempt to get rid of Mexicans who were taking jobs away from "real Americans" during the depression.

Gee, what's going on today? The US has a large Latino population working in this country and we could be well heading for a recession. Watch for something new to become illegal.

It's not that I want to lie about it. And I don't necessarily doubt that some of the "facts" out there are propaganda. As for lung cancer, I believe it's true that far more get it and die from ordinary cigarettes than from marijuana, simply because far more people smoke tobacco than marijuana and those who do so do in far greater quantities. But continually inhaling any type of smoke into one's lungs on a long-term basis causes irritation that, over time, can cause the lung tissue to mutate into cancer. But I've known far too many people who have smoked marijuana and then subsequently seen their lives go downhill to believe that it's totally "harmless". In particular, when I was in college a lot of my fraternity brothers smoked. I can think of 2 in particular. The first one was two years ahead of me, meaning that he was a junior when I was a freshman. He was a heavy marijuana user by the time I got to know him, was considerably overweight (from the eating binges brought on by the sensation of extreme hunger that occurs as the high starts to wear off), had bulging eyes that were bloodshot much of the time and was very careless about his appearance. He also used cocaine and drank heavily (as most of us frat boys did, lol!) Now all of this might not sound unusual in and of itself. But looking at the composite photographs of the brothers from the previous two years prior to when I joined the fraternity revealed a rather startling truth. Looking at this particular guy's picture from his freshman year (2 years prior to my becoming a member), he was well-groomed, had naturally deep-set eyes, was considerably lighter and very well-dressed. It was actually shocking and, if not for the name below his picture, you'd never believe it was the same person. His sophomore year picture the following year showed some deterioration ; still recognizable compared to the previous year but a little more unkempt and somewhat heavier. But the following year, the one in which I first appeared as a freshman, he looks like a totally different person. If you could see the two pictures side-by-side, separated by only two years, save for the name below you'd never believe it was the same person. The following year, he isn't even in the composite photo, having flunked out of school and forced to go home in disgrace and face his parents, owing us (the fraternity) $600 for room and board and taking up a job at a car wash for minimum wage (he had started as an engineering major.) On top of that, those who knew him during his high school years confirm that he was an honor student throughout high school and his freshman year in college. Now I'm not suggesting that marijuana use was the sole factor in this person's not-for-the-better transformation but it's pretty hard to deny that it at least played a part. The other example that comes to mind is a fellow who was 1 year ahead of me. Like the first guy, he was a marijuana user, very overweight (even more so than the first guy), used cocaine and drank very heavily. For him, my revelation came not from looking at past composite photographs but when I stumbled across one of his high school yearbook pictures and I was SHOCKED. He was a good 60 lbs. lighter and had a far healthier complexion and the caption under his picture stated that he was likewise an honor student. Granted, in this case there was a few more years gap than the first example but the changes that were evident would not have happened naturally over just a few years' span. The following year (my sophomore, his junior) he came back to start the fall semester only to find out that he had been dropped for poor grades, just like the other guy I spoke of. He lingered on, staying at the house for a semester, too ashamed to go home and tell his parents that he'd flunked out of school, but of course he eventually had to live up to that reality. Again, I'm not suggesting that marijuana is the sole culprit but you're never going to convince me that it didn't play a role and probably a major one at that. Even my own example should serve as a warning. When I went away to college I didn't use marijuana but I did drink alcohol, more than I should have and certainly far more than I ever did in my pre-college years. I gained weight as a result and said and did a lot of foolish things when I was under the influence. I managed to stay in school and graduate but my grades weren't as high as they had been in high school, at least not until my senior year. THe guys that I spoke of likewise no doubt started with alcohol, then progressed to marijuana and finally to cocaine. So based on what I've witnessed and not just heard or read, I can't honestly say that marijuana is "harmless" and that the government is just trying to scare me.

I think these guys had something more going on than the drug issues. Let's face it. College is as much about what goes on out of class as in class. Don't know anything about their home life, but what you are saying is that they did fine in a structured home environment, but when left up to their own devices, they ran a muck. The particular way they did it in the environment of your fraternity was through drugs which actually says something about that frat. Would they be any better off if they had gone to a different environment where booze was the drop out route of choice? I think not.

Back to pot. It wasn't the pot. It was their life choices. I bet excon can say a thing or two about that.

BTW, I never heard nicotine was the culprit in lung cancer. I thought it was the tar. Wow, so taking the "cigarettes as a nicotine delivery device" idea a bit further, cigarettes might be seen as a lung cancer delivery device. Tobacco companies modulating nicotine content to hook smokers takes on a whole new meaning.

excon, am I right in assuming the nicotine has to be added? That it isn't in tobacco per se? I smoke cigars and I don't get a nicotine high from them... nothing remotely like the buzz I used to get from that first cigarette of the day. With cigars, it is tactile oral pleasure... which probably says something about me.

So are you saying that the things that I noticed from him are the kind of symptoms of someone who is in to drugs?

me and my boyfrend, we have been going out for more than a year. and i always suspected that he smokes weed. and recently i found out some stuff in his ashtray and i told him that i know he is smoking weed and i showed him proof. but he said its not his and that its his cousine's and a frend's. so i called them up, and his cousine said its none of my business and his frend said that it was his stuff, not my boyfreind's.
i want to know if he is smoking weed. i want to find out. but how can i tell?
Research the appearance, etc. of weed on the internet, then you can test it to see if it is weed or not. Just so you know, it is more harmful to smoke bakky than weed.

If your boyfriend is smoking weed his house will smell of it his eyes will be red and bloodshot and if you ask him if he's high he will tell you xx

My man dose it I hate it won't touch it :P yuck basically weed has a really obvious smell give him a kiss when ever you get home or after he's been alone and I mean a proper full on kiss smoch stuff you'll taste it it's hard to discrib but if you've picked it out of and ash try then you'll no the smell it sort of tastes the same the smoke sits heavy in the room to. Don't be to hard on him I no it's bad but the worse thing to do is blame and yell and such just be lax about it till he relaxs and trusts you with it then you can work on stopping it just be happy that's it's not a really hard drug :)

You already KNOW your boyfriend is using drugs and using you. He is lying to you and you are in DENIAL about the relationship ending.

Best advise, seek help from a professional counselor, not some faceless people off the Internet. Otherwise you WILL get burned in this, you still might.

Best of luck.

You already KNOW your boyfriend is using drugs and using you. He is lieing to you and you are in DENIAL about the relationship ending.

Best advise, seek help from a professional counselor, not some faceless people off the Internet. Otherwise you WILL get burned in this, you still might.

Best of luck.

These faceless people are here to help, either that is your purpose as well, or you are here looking for advice too, try and be less judgemental, it won't get you very far here.

me and my boyfrend, we have been going out for more than a year. and i always suspected that he smokes weed. and recently i found out some stuff in his ashtray and i told him that i know he is smoking weed and i showed him proof. but he said its not his and that its his cousine's and a frend's. so i called them up, and his cousine said its none of my business and his frend said that it was his stuff, not my boyfreind's.
i want to know if he is smoking weed. i want to find out. but how can i tell?
He'll seem more drousy and laid back than usual and he will also be more grumpy !

If the friends he hangs out with smoke weed then of course he is smoking weed. If he didn't he would not be hanging out with them.