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View Full Version : Confused about my 4yr olds sexuality


CSW6314
Feb 13, 2008, 09:12 AM
The 4yr old in question is actually my niece, recently she has been telling everyone that she has a girlfriend. She even gets on the phone and pretends she is talking to this imaginary girlfriend.
I told her to stop saying it because she is way to young to have a boy or girlfriend. But now she is actually being physical. According to her daycare teacher an her older brother she told some little girl in her daycare that she wanted to have sex an got on top of her an kissed her on the lips!! Her mother immediately came an spanked her an told her girls don't kiss girls.
To my knowledge my niece an that little girl kissed a few more time before the little girls mother removed her from the day care. My niece told me she misses her.
What should I do? Is it possibly that my little princess is gay ay such a young age? Could she be copying one of her out lesbian aunts that is always around? Thanks for any replies

tickle
Feb 13, 2008, 09:54 AM
She has lesbian aunts? I guess that is the source of your problem, then; auntie has been telling her tales I guess and you will have to put a stop to it. I am not saying I disagree with a person's lifestyle but auntie should now that little girls are impressionable. Not entirely fair to do this.

CSW6314
Feb 13, 2008, 11:43 AM
No her aunt would never tell her anything to make her behave like that. She does bring her girlfriend around but to my knowlegde they don't do anything in front of her. I guess ill have to have a talk an ask her to be extra careful around my little niece.

michealb
Feb 13, 2008, 12:16 PM
4 year olds don't have a sexual preference. At 4, they do what they see, sometimes they get it right sometimes they get it wrong. She was copying something she saw or heard. She could have seen it anywhere from TV to her aunt.

Love-Life
Feb 13, 2008, 01:22 PM
It might be an early sign of your niece being a lesbian. She is still so young that it might be hard to tell. She is only four, she doesn't know anything about what being a lesbian is, or what sex actually is. I wouldn't worry too much about it, she's too young to realize what she's doing. But Im sorry to say... if she gets older and actually is attracted to other girls there's nothing you can do. There's nothing wrong with being gay.

ScottGem
Feb 13, 2008, 01:30 PM
At 4 she has no idea of sexuality. Yes she is acting out something she read or saw or heard someplace. Spanking her (especially saying that girls don't kiss girls) was the totally wrong thing to do.

What should be done is to have someone try and find out what prompted the behavior. Find out where she learned it. And to do so in a non threatening way.

Kids do try to emulate things they see, this is natural. The trick is to teach them what's appropriate and when.

CSW6314
Feb 14, 2008, 06:00 AM
Thanks everyone for your responses. My niece is still claiming she has a girlfriend but all the physical things have stopped (as far as I know) she is not hugging or kissing any little girls.
I also told her mother not to tell her that two girls kissing is bad because if she does grow up ti be a lesbian I don't want her hiding it from me.
I told my niece to pretend she's talking to her best friend when she talking on her little fake cell phone so she's been saying girlfriend less. Thanks again for your responses

tickle
Feb 14, 2008, 06:04 AM
You show good sense, CSW6314.