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macksmom
Feb 10, 2008, 08:08 AM
Hey everyone!

So most of you know a little background, but for those that don't. I have a 6year old daughter from a previous relationship. The father has been in and out of her life. A year ago he started seeing her again, but before that he had not seen her in 4 years.

Anyway...

I just went out to lunch with him yesterday to discuss things. To make a long story short, he had agreed to relinquish his parental rights and allow my husband to adopt her.

I have been doing some research on where to start, I have to call my court house Monday to see their specific requirements (some counties require you to be married a year, others do not) But I want to get the ball rolling on this. I have found the forms and costs for things I need to file.

Basically, I was wondering does anyone have personal or professional experience in this area?
Since the bio father is in agreement with everything do you think I could do this all without an attorney?
I know in most cases back child support still has to be paid, but I want to take that out of the arrangement... I read that most judges order for it to be paid, but they can and have agreed to 'forgive' the back amount depending on what happens during the whole court procedure... I mean if we are both in agreement not to hold the bio father accountable for arrearages, do you think that will be enough for the judge to agree as well?

This all took me by surprise... I never thought he would say "yes" to my offer. Or at the least I thought he would initially tell me no then go home and think about it and eventually tell me yes... guess sometimes child support weighs heavily in on the decision.

Well any advice or input would be great... I need pointed in the right direction haha

s_cianci
Feb 10, 2008, 09:41 AM
Technically you could probably do it without a lawyer. But since everyone seems to be in agreement it wouldn't cost you all that much to have a lawyer draft up the paperwork and file it for you in your local Family Court. It would be money well spent and you could be assured that everything would be legal. It would also help in ironing out the kinks regarding owed back child support, etc. as that's going to be your biggest issue. Although you and he may be in agreement, the laws of your state may dictate otherwise and a lawyer would help you navigate your way through all of that.

JudyKayTee
Feb 10, 2008, 11:06 AM
Hey everyone!

So most of you know a little background, but for those that don't. I have a 6year old daughter from a previous relationship. The father has been in and out of her life. A year ago he started seeing her again, but before that he had not seen her in 4 years.

Anywho....

I just went out to lunch with him yesterday to discuss things. To make a long story short, he had agreed to relinquish his parental rights and allow my husband to adopt her.

I have been doing some research on where to start, I have to call my court house Monday to see their specific requirements (some counties require you to be married a year, others do not) But I want to get the ball rolling on this. I have found the forms and costs for things I need to file.

Basically, I was wondering does anyone have personal or professional experience in this area?
Since the bio father is in agreement with everything do you think I could do this all without an attorney?
I know in most cases back child support still has to be paid, but I want to take that out of the arrangement....I read that most judges order for it to be paid, but they can and have agreed to 'forgive' the back amount depending on what happens during the whole court procedure....I mean if we are both in agreement not to hold the bio father accountable for arrearages, do you think that will be enough for the judge to agree as well?

This all took me by surprise...I never thought he would say "yes" to my offer. Or at the least I thought he would initially tell me no then go home and think about it and eventually tell me yes.....guess sometimes child support weighs heavily in on the decision.

Well any advice or input would be great....I need pointed in the right direction haha


No personal experience but managed a Family Law firm for some years - if you don't get an Attorney and save money now you may very well end up having problems and paying the slow, hard, painful way in the future.

With something this serious I'd make certain that all the "i's" are dotted and the "t's" crossed.

(And congratulations - you must be ELATED!)

macksmom
Feb 11, 2008, 05:36 AM
Thanks, yes I am very happy overall. Still kind of thrown by it all... guess I didn't expect him to answer so quickly, or to agree at all. There is still that small part of me that is hurt that he could so easily give up all rights to his child... but it is what I wanted, and it is what is best all around.

I will be calling attorneys today. I agree, I want to make sure everything is done right the first time and not leave any room for me to mess it up. I am going to call down to the courthouse today and see what other info I can get... my main concern is the marriage requirement (my husband and I have only been married about 7 1/2 months).

macksmom
Feb 12, 2008, 08:45 AM
Well I got an appt with an attorney for next Tuesday. I will ask all my questions and such and let everyone one what they said... may be able to help others who haven't been to an attorney yet.

Ugh... I just hope this all goes smoothly.

hereford_10
Jan 31, 2012, 11:31 PM
Hi. Not in your state but just hurry and except his word and get out! Make sure it was in writing? I'm hoping for something simiular in your case but I don't think so. Good luck!

JudyKayTee
Feb 1, 2012, 09:05 AM
This is from 2009 - why don't you open your own thread so other people can see it?

The people notified on this thread that there is recent activity are only the people who have responded before.