View Full Version : Feel like breaking NC after 4 months.Should I?
bustertypsy
Feb 5, 2008, 06:08 AM
Today is exactly 4 months since my ex finished our relationship.I have this incredible urge to contact her over the past 2 days.I keep telling myself that I could be only a phone call away from having her back in my life.We broke up after a row,when she walked out and never made any effort to contact me.After 31/2 years together I still find I am in awe as to why she ended it.
I know she loved me right up to that point,but she is an incredibly stubborn person and I fear even if she wanted me back she would not contact me.I know by contacting her I am letting her know that I am weak and needy.I wouldn't care if it got the desired results.
Please advise me and tell me if I am putting myself in a very vulnerable situation.I just feel that by doing nothing I am ensuring that we will never be together again.Thank you for reading this.I feel desperate right now.
little firefly
Feb 5, 2008, 07:28 AM
You ARE putting yourself in a vulnerable situation. I'm saying this as someone who knows from experience, PLEASE don't break N/C. You will just set yourself up to feel bad again. Believe me I had those urges too... strong ones. I broke N/C a few months ago and I felt that I had emotionally gone back to square one. I was just hindering my healing. Since then I've controlled those urges and I feel so much better! Stubborn or not, if she wants you she knows where to find you. Don't make yourself look to be desperate. It will get better, just keep fighting those feelings and keep N/C!!
samesame
Feb 5, 2008, 11:31 AM
Don't break it. You've come a long way. I've been no contact (on my part) for 7 months now, after a 4 year relationship where I was told she didn't love me anymore. It's hard bud, but don't let overthinking mess you up. Remember, you can't do anything wrong if you do nothing at all. Little firefly is right. "if she wants you she knows where to find you."
After, about 6 months of no contact, my ex called me in Dec. to wish me a merry x-mas, we did the whole "hey how are you doing routine" for 20 minutes. And then that's it. It was hallow and all it succeeded in doing is messing up my head more. Really it lead to nowhere and I was doing better before the call. Just let it go. After 3-1/2 years, she will probably call you eventually anyway to do the same "hey how you doing?" routine. Stay strong, and don't break it.
talaniman
Feb 5, 2008, 05:49 PM
Clean your closet, polish your shoes, anything but breaking NC. The feeling will pass, just like gas.
imation
Feb 6, 2008, 07:33 AM
Never!! Don't do it please don't do it!
If you've never believed any other words, believe these.
It's over, there'll be others, its not the end of the world, if you call her you will feel worse.
Its all there, all you need to know, write it on the back of your hand if you need to, hell I have and trust me, the feeling of realising that somewhere a while back you must have let go and not even remember when... its just fantastic.
Go have fun!
LoveStoned
Mar 18, 2010, 09:36 PM
I feel the same way as you. I haven't spoken to my ex in a year. I completely ignored his calls. And it hurt. No I hurt cause I miss him and don't know if he misses me the same. I changed my number so if he did call I wouldn't even no. Sometimes I feel like since I was the one to innitiate the break up maybe I should be the one trying to find him to fix it