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View Full Version : Having a loved one who is a gambling addict


brady1208
Jan 10, 2008, 12:15 AM
I have been with my boyfriend for about a year and a half, he has had a serious gambling problem for almost 13 years. He tries to fight it and goes to gambler's anonymous meetings but it is always just a matter of time before he continues to gamble. He constantly cries to me about the money he's lost and how much he wants to stop. The only time we ever spend together is me sitting at his house while he plays online poker for hours and hours. We never go anywhere, and he will never spend any real money unless its for gambling. There have been several times where he wins thousands and gambles it all away. I find myself getting angry at him for losing what he wins, constantly spending money to play and never spending quality time with me. Currently I have lost my job and my boyfriend said he would support me but now he owes everyone money and still everyday he spends more and more to gamble. We fight all the time because when he keeps spending money to play I will tell him how stupid it is, and how he owes all this money to people and he shouldn't be doing that, he gets furious with me. And tells me that he feels bad enough about his problem and I shouldn't make him feel worse than he already does. I guess my question is how am I supposed to react to him blowing money on this all the time when I know he shouldn't be? How do I not make him feel that Iam against him. And I was wondering if maybe I should tell him Iam not going to come over when he is going to gamble... I just need to know what the right way to deal with this problem is, without making him feel like I hate him?

Choux
Jan 10, 2008, 03:20 PM
Time for you to fall in love with LIFE, girl.
Move on... this guy has nothing positive to offer you. Time to work on making yourself happy. :)

Bluerose
Jan 10, 2008, 06:41 PM
brady1208,

Sorry but it is time for a reality check. He is never going to change without some huge 'life shock', something that wakens him up to what he is doing. There must have been other people in his life before you, people who also tried to help him and get him to change. It's never going to happen. Cut the ties that bind and get your own life stared.

lovelesspa
Jan 11, 2008, 02:00 PM
Try to get your life back together and stop wasting your time waiting for him. Start by looking for another job and start seeing other friends. Your just spinning your wheels with this guy. Your idea about not going over there, the best idea you had! He's not going to change, and there is a whole worthwhile world out there just waiting for your to rejoin it!