I didn't have a dad when I was small. My first 4 years I had a rough time with my mom. Afterwards, my dad came back. Ever since then they had been going on and off. And now, its coming close to my birthday. My dad has hit me, and he has verbaly abused me. Everyday. Oh, your fat. Your ugly. Stupid. I am so sick of it. I feel like I'm the only one in the world who has this crappy dad. I know, I'm not the only one. But it sure as hell feels like it when I'm getting yelled at from my dad. Im not fat, or ugly. Or stupid. I have a gpa of 3.5. I've gotten accepted into programs that would PAY for my college. And still, he rants on about me. Someone. Please. Tell me you know what I'm going through.

Someone. Please. Tell me you know what im going through.

I know. Hang in there. There are ways to cope.

I will assume that your mother is not helping you in this situation,so is there a councelor or teacher at your school you can talk to?Your dad has a problem and I doubt he would listen to any one about seekig help for himself.None of this is your fault and I suspect you'll be leaving for college soon.For now you should talk to a trustd adult about your problem!Good Luck I hope I've helped.:cool:

Deprived, it must be painful to feel ridiculed by your father when he's supposed to love you unconditionally. Your father sounds like a person who has difficulty expressing loving, caring thoughts and finds it much easier to give criticism. Talk to your dad, tell him that when he calls you names and talks to you the way he does, it makes you feel really bad. If he doesn't stop abusing you, speak to your school counselor.

Hi, deprived,
I am so sorry to read this. Your Dad is very abusive, and if your Mom is afraid of him, she won't be any help. That's why they are "on and off" as you say.
Others suggested talking with a counselor, which is good advice.
Here is a link:

http://www.childhelpusa.org/report_local.htm

Personally, I would call the Child Abuse organization in your local area. There are phone numbers in your local phone book, or you can look up your state in the above link.
Call a toll-free number and talk with a Professional about it. You do NOT have to put up with Child Abuse from your Father!
He sounds very abusive, and I also wonder if he drinks a lot... maybe not.
Please call a toll-free number, and talk with someone. They can offer you a whole lot of help. I do wish the best of luck.

All those names your father calls you and stuff he says is probably really how he feels about himself maybe that's things his father said to him and he feels like he's saying it back to his father when he says it to you. Whatever the cause its not your fault and since he probably won't seek any counseling I think you should do as these people have said and make some steps to help yourself. I hope you can get out and leave to college soon.

Im sorry to hear that your father has been treating you like this, as you know this is wrong, and I'm very pleased that at least you know that it is not true.

It sounds like your father has got an anger issue that needs sorting out ASAP, you will probley find that he feels very low about himself or has got issue's that don't seem to be going away, our has major problems in his own life... Its very important that you know that non of the stuff he is saying to you is true!! If he kicks off at you try and walk away to not be in the same room as him and just ignor him till he can act like the adult he is meant to be.

And non of this you are to blame for, he has got issue's not you.

Go seek that advice from teachers or people in your school that you can talk with... I would also go as far as telling your mother too book your father into the doctors and tell them what he has been acting like.

Please keep your head up and be strong, because as a minor you must be going over hell with all that's going on.

I don't have much to add to all the superb advice you've received from others, but I did want you to know that I hated my father too (he is now deceased), and for similar reasons to your own. So I understand what you're going through, and you are definitely not alone! Many people have or have had troubles with their parents like this. Please seek outside help and keep us updated on how you're doing.

I don't have much to add to all the superb advice you've received from others, but I did want you to know that I hated my father too (he is now deceased), and for similar reasons to your own. So I understand what you're going through, and you are definitely not alone! Many people have or have had troubles with their parents like this. Please seek outside help and keep us updated on how you're doing.

Sound advice

Hi its good you know these things he says about you are not true just ignore him like other people said that's what I did just used to ignore him until he gave up.

Remember - Its NOT your fault he's the one with the problem not you

hi its good you know these things he says about you are not true just ignore him like other people said thats what i did just used to ignore him until he gave up.

Remember - Its NOT your fault hes the one with the problem not you

Could not agree more than with manutd4eva.. Sadly with familys we are born into them, at least with friends we can pick them. Just go with the ignore options.

I can't go to a counsler. I just can't tell on my dad. I love him so much, even after all he's done. I rememebr one time when my parents where fighting, he threatened to leave. Even after all he's done to me, I said no. I begged him not to leave. I can't take him being mad at me. Me and him got into a fight yesterday, and today I tried talking to him. He ignored me completely. So I just went to my room and cried. :(

I feel sorry for you and hipe it gets better soon but what you can do is try waiting until he is calm like a different day and then explain to him how you feel about it. Not in an angry way but in a understanding type way.

He never listens to me. Ive tried so many times to talk to him. He's seen me sitting there, crying. ALl he does is shake his head at me and tells me to stop crying or he'll give me something to cry about.

I would try asking your mum or write a letter and leave it outside his bedroom before you go to school and when you get back say did you see my note and see how it goes from there.

I'll put it in his wallet. Thanks for the advice,all of you. :) I know now where to go to when I'm feeling down, or depressed. Bless you all. <33

Hope it works out for you and remember you can always come back

I'll put it in his wallet. Thanks for the advice,all of you. :) I know now where to go to when im feeling down, or depressed. Bless you all. <33

You are always welcome to come here and get things off your chest the door is open 24/7 and there is nearly always someone around... I hope that things work out OK for you and wish you luck in getting this problem fixed!

I also think that the letter to your dad is a brilliant idear.:cool:

Dear deprived, first of all welcome to the forum and I hope you stay on, as we will be here for you 24/7, just as someone said.
I'm a 55 year old woman who was abused the same way by a mother who could not utter a kind word toward me all her life. She tried to abort me, ridiculed me all my life, chased away my friends, and drove my father away and my step-dad to drinking until he died. So you see, these things have gone on for decades. Luckily now though, there are help groups where victims like you can get help and support from, even if you don't want to 'turn him in' it's still emotionally helpful for you to get support for yourself. Unfortunately, we cannot change others - they have to change themselves - but we can change ourselves by keeping a healthy and positive attitude and not let things others do to us bring us down. As said before, your dad probably was maltreated himself and knows no other way to communicate, but it still hurts. The pain and frustration you are going though will help you get stronger and also help you in your plans in the future on how to treat a family when you have one of your own. Other than that, unless you do turn him in - the only alternative is to leave and make your own life as stable and peaceful as possible. When the time comes and you are older, you'll maybe get the chance to 'tell him off' but don't count on it. Just do the best that you can for your own survival and I wish you a great future - knowing what not to do - will give you a head-start. I don't know what you put in the letter to him, or the outcome - but I hope it did help you a little. At any rate, don't forget - you've got a family here with us any time. Good Luck.

http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/16/16_4_23v.gif (http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb001_ZN)Keep a brighter outlook on life by seeing other's mistakes.

:) Great advice Chery and we all can feel that from your heart!:cool:

:) Great advice Chery and we all can feel that from your heart!:cool:Thanks dear, that's another reason why I love my therapy job (non-paying now) which I do from at home and on the phone. It's a shame that our future assets are not appreciated and nurtured, as they deserve.

http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/36/36_22_18.gif (http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb001_ZN)

I understand completely, I am now 22 and I went through the same thing. My dad was however and alcoholic and the abuse didn't stop until he got chemical poisoning in his blood and nearly died and had to stop drinking. I think my mom still goes through it, but doesn't tell me. Keep your head up and know its his problem not yours.

I am glad to know you are still trying to do something with your life, next you will need counseling when you get married and/or before, sadly being abused like this can and will cause you problems latter ( very likely not always)

Next if and when he hits you report it to your school counselor, they are trained to handle situations like that.

Hello there,
I know what you going through my dad verbaly abused too. My parents are together but the same as yours one day they love each other then the next day there going to kill each other. I know how much it messes with your mind and it makes me hate them most of the time. If you ever need someone to talk to I'm always here you can talk to me. If you have msn messenger, Yahoo messenger or aim you can add me I'm on most always on.

Devan

Hi sweeti, aww I'm so sorry for everything you've been through, it must be very painfull for you, I really hope everything turns out allright for you. Keep your head up and don't let others put you down! You know you're a good,lovely,intelligent person and what your dad says is rubbish so don't listen to it. He sounds like the sort of person who finds it hard to express love or positive thoughts to others and prefers to say negative stuff and criticize. It's him that's in the wrong and not you. You don't deserve to be treated the way you do. If you're still living like this with an abusive father (as I know it was last year when you posted on here), my advice to you, and anyone else who's in a similar situation, is to try to get away from the house as much as possible as being around someone abusive like your dad isn't healthy. Spend time with friends and maybe sleepover at their's or a relative's now and then. You could join clubs/take up a hobby,things you enjoy, or make visits to the library, shopping or go somewhere/do something you like that'll occupy you and help you forgot about your home problems. Ignore your dad's rants (try to focus your mind on other things in your head when he starts on you) and keep away from him. If you can't, do things that'll absorb your mind like reading/listening to music/drawing/writing/watching tv/calling or texting friends or studying etc. as far away in the house as possible from your parents (and if you're in a situation where you wanted to block sounds and voices out, you could wear earplugs/listen to music). Taking up a part-time job if you haven't already could also be something to focus your mind and yourself on. If you have any other relatives you can contact, it might really help talking to them about it or talking to a counselor as although you seem like a strong person, dealing with your emotions with someone else who understands and will try to help can be a slight burden lifted off your shoulders. Its not too healthy if you keep it all bottled inside. If not a relative or counselor, maybe a good friend? I find meditation can be very calming if you're feeling upset or angry. It basically involves closing you eyes and breathing deep breaths in and out, trying to clear things from your head, and just focusing on your breathing. If you just start, you won't suddenly master it. You should try 5mins of it the 1st day, then abit more the 2nd and then more the next so on. You might not notice big changes at first but once you've mastered it and after awhile of doing it everyday, I find you'll feel more calm and peaceful about things.
Remember, you won't have to live like this forever, keep your head focused and carry on doing great in your studying and you'll soon beable to move away from home and start your own new life afresh and free from your dad :) god bless you hunni, lotsa lv xXx <3

I didnt have a dad when I was small. My first 4 years I had a rough time with my mom. Afterwards, my dad came back. Ever since then they had been going on and off. And now, its coming close to my birthday. My dad has hit me, and he has verbaly abused me. Everyday. Oh, your fat. Your ugly. Stupid. I am so sick of it. I feel like im the only one in the world who has this crappy dad. I know, im not the only one. But it sure as hell feels like it when im getting yelled at from my dad. Im not fat, or ugly. Or stupid. I have a gpa of 3.5. I've gotten accepted into programs that would PAY for my college. And still, he rants on about me. Someone. Please. Tell me you know what im going through.
Hey, You know what? You remind me of something, I have been through such things long time ago. I had to deal with my mom and I always felt that she did not like me. She was always picking on me and calls me names. I was 16 when I decided to leave the house. Life was hard then but I made it through.
Let me tell you now, I have done good things all my life just to prove she was wrong. I do have a pretty good situation now, and I overheard that she would love to see me again. Time will look over that matter and your dad might be proud of you one day either you let time work for you or you just don't look back and go on to your life.
I haven't talked to my mom since 1976 I feel OK with that. It is really up to you U guess what I have done might not be the best thing to do but I did survive.

Hey hun... I know exactly how you feel because I go through the same thing tooo... it sucks but I have learned that I have to prove my dad wrong and I do at a lot of things but sometimes that just makes things worse... he hits me to and I finally get out of the hell hold hopefully my mom is trying to get custody over me... but umm does your mom know that he talks to you in that way and that he hits you... or does he wait till its you and him and it feels like you get it twice as worse... thats what mine did and finally my mom talked me into showing the school counselor and it got social services in it and everything... from what I've been through is what I understand is that if he leaves a mark on your body for no reason it is abuse and you can take action...

ohhhhhhh girl, I know how u feel, and there is one day that goes by that I wish him dead, I know it's a sin to say that you hate your father but damn it I do. U got to hang in there baby girl, because u know u got your whole life in front of u, do good and don't let it bother u a lot. Find something that makes u happy and trie to stay out of his way, BASTARDS NEVER CHANGE. U don't need him, u sound like a wonderful person. God bless

You're not alone, some fathers are just not grateful of what they have, I'm in the same situation as you, my father beats the crap out of me, and today, for the very first time, I actually defended myself, he punches me and hits me as if he were in a fight with a GUY. I'm a 17 year old girl, and I honestly know where you're coming from. :(

I feel for you! All of you out there being hit and beat, and abused. I have a Master's in Social Work. I have worked with many families, children, and teens. I have two questions. Are you saying your father hit you recently? How old are you? All girls on here that are being hit, regardless of age! Hitting someone is called abuse. When someone hits you, verbally abuses you, or sexually abuses you, CALL THE POLICE! There's no reason to have to live in fear! Even if it is a mother, father, or relative! Mummysgurl is so right!
Love yourselves, protect yourselves! Stand up for yourselves by doing the right thing! Tell/call the police as soon as you can, but remember, your safety always comes first, if doing so at the time puts you in danger, wait until you are sure you are safe to do so, and call the police!
The feelings of hate, harming the person are a natural response to repetitive abuse. Don't ever let anyone break your spirit! or destroy your beauty, or take away your faith, your hope, and your ability to feel compassion!
When you are having negative thoughts and feelings, take a deep, deep breath, and tell yourself that you must focus on the positive... when someone calls you ugly, or fat, or any derogatory name - go to the mirror and tell yourselves out loud that YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. Tell yourselves this: "Self, I love myself the way I am, there's nothing I need to change. I'm beautiful, I'm capable, there's nothing to rearrange."

I can see your pain.I have felt it too.The same thing but I know what to do.He sounds lika a guy that is not happy with himself and pours it on others.I am not an expert but try to go to a family sichologist.No matter how much you try you must do it that is the way my problem not dissapeard but at least fainted a lot and the rest was all jokes.I can't say anything more, hope this helps.