My ex had left me for a new man. I'm so upset, I know the reason is that I've been overly protective with her but that's because she's been acting distant and now I know why. She said she don't want to talk to again, I tried to meet her at work but she just didn't want to see me, she looked furious. I don't know what to do I really want her back... we've broken up before but we always get bak together but I don't know what to do now. She's found another man and she already in a relationship with him. HELP! I'm so devastated I want her back, I really miss her :(

Well I think that you should just give her sometime or maybe just try to be friends good friends because obviously everything hasent been working out. Its okay to be her body guard but u can't be over protected or the real jealous type cause she might love u still but its going to drive her away.

I would check these awesome posts out for starters :)

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/how-break-up-survive-101-use-you-wish-114179.html

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/what-expect-when-you-get-dumped-123862.html

If the other person is seeing someone else already you really only have 1 option :( Goodluck!

Dude, just leave her alone, because its obvious she doesn't want you in her life. Read the links in my signature amd move on.

Sad... but the more you pursue, the more she will pull away. It is human nature.

It was already a red light flashing at your face when she acted distant. Although you should care and understand why she is acting like that, you should not have been overly protective. That is a BIG turn-off.

Now, I am afraid it is too late. She has someone new, and you made yourself so detested by her. Luck is not on your side. If you truly think that you want her back, the only way is to remain distant for the time being. Give her time to stop disliking you. At least by then, you can talk to her without being told to bug off again.

No guarantee that she will give you a second chance (in fact I think its not the second chance since you two have broken up a few times already). Unless she loses interest in the new guy and realises your worth, you have zero chance in winning her back.

Ultimately, the best advice is to move on. Sounds harsh, I know. So just take a break from her and clear your head. You will be more ready to handle things in future.

Yeah I spoke to her friends they said to just leave her alone. Its really hard to leave her I keep thinking about that new man she's with. I don't know him, I haven't seen him but she told me his name. I know its partly my fault that she left me because I drove her away but.. I really want her back, we've been together for 1 year and 7 months. Should I give it time to cool down? Because I tried calling her but she won't pick up my calls. I really love her and want her back. :( :confused:

Thanks for that advise... I will leave her alone but its so hard.. but I need too. I've realized now how much I treated her badly.

You stop calling, stop trying to see her and move on with your life.
If you don't she may soon get a restraining order.
She has moved on, is dating someone else, I is time to understand when things are over and go on.

Read all this information in the previous answers; hour by hour, day by day, you will do fine; just keep looking forwards.

How long should I be distant/not call her for? How should I deal with this? :( she was also my first love.. and I was hers too.

No one can answer that. Your focus needs to be getting yourself "squared away"; not feeling so hurt and dependent on what she is doing, but thinking more about what you are doing in a positive manner to take care of yourself. What kind of work do you do?

I go college. She don't really want nothing to do with me now. I should just leave her alone?

Yes, leave her alone; so what year of college?

Uhm you should go over to the relationship sections and read the first 2 sticky... but dude... seem like you still overprotective... and even if you get her back.. same thing going to happened again..

So how about just give her some space... time will heal anything... and trying to go out and have fun.. meeting new pplz... get dates... get yourself busy...

Don't ever get all alone at home.. b.c that would make you think about her more... do things.. work out... runs... play basketball... whatever keep you busy... dont get into a conner and think... go out and do things... you will feel much more better

Thanks I will do that but I really still want her back... she said we isn't never going to get back together? Do you tink she means it? And she said she wants to be with him but how can she leave me for 1 year and 7 months she must miss me later on? Will she ever miss me or want me back :( :confused:

I'm 17 so I'm in my second year I really want her back:confused: :(

Girls... say a lot of stuff. And mean other things. But when she says "leave me alone" and she also says "we're not getting back together"... she probably means that. But who knows, maybe the new guy's an idiot and she may come back to you. But honestly, if you keep calling her, trying to see her, it's just a bit pathetic, and no one really likes pathetic guys.

Get cleaned up. Shave. Take a shower. And have fun with your friends. Women are attracted to confident guys that can hold on their own. They hate guys that are whiny and wimpy and can't be alone. Keep the wimpy act, and you'll be guaranteeing yourself NO girls in the end.

SO. You want your ex back. She doesn't want you back. It sucks, but you can't do anything about it. Best thing you can do is get your act together. DON'T CALL HER! And just do other things. The reason there are stickies and links on peoples' signatures is because everyone goes through this one time or another, and it always sucks, but the stickies... they help.

Go call up that friend you haven't seen in a while. Go to lunch. Go to a movie. You'll be fine.

Since this is your first, you are about to learn a very painfull lesson in life, There are no guarantees, and its always changing. As you grow you will learn to cope with it.

She said to her friend that she's not getting to excited over him its just a bit of fun. Do you think I should leave it for now? Have no contact with her and see what happens...

Yes, leave it alone, no contact by you, do not involve her friends and do not let her friends get involved; if she isn't big enough to communicate with you, then you don't want her. I say this because she left you; she looked furious and did not want to see you.

I agree with George. Leave her alone. What is very very important is that you surround yourself with things that make you happy. Keep yourself occupied so that you don't focus on thinking about her all the time - that will just make it worse. If you have a hobby then immerse yourself in it. You need to find ways to take your mind off her. First few weeks will be hard but as time goes on you will find yourself moving on. Good luck!