AustProd6
Dec 10, 2007, 12:13 AM
Dumping is a Power Play.
They want you to know they have there life and are in charge of it. That sometimes means that by dumping you they want to jolt you into realising what you have lost. Sometimes it's cause you have messed up, sometimes it's because they have messed up. What ever the reason they are going or gone.
Here's what to do.
1. Agree with them, don't ask why, don't beg, don't argue just say OK. Have a great life!
Nothing frustrates them more than non confrontation. Whether they texted you, phoned you or just plain left without telling you. Simply say OK.
2. Then go into absolute NON CONTACT.
You have just gained Control of the situation.
If they call to give you a piece of there mind, simply say "I never gave you permission to call me on this number" and hang up. Before they get much out. Interrupt them if you have to. Remember they have rehearsed what they wanted to say over and over and surprise is the key to them. Stop them dead in there tracks.
It's like a resignation from your job. You want to be heard.
Even if your leaving on good terms, you still want to be heard or at least talked out of it. Out of courtesy.
How frustrated would you be if no one did try to talk you out of it. Or wanted to here what they had to say. They just said OK have a great life.
The No Contact reinforces the your "OK" approach and reaffirms you have the power.
It drives them nuts.
The lion may roar, but the lion with the biggest roar is dominant. In this case your roar is your silence.
Remember: If they do not here from you or accept there contact, they will never know how crap and upset you feel. They never see or here your tears, they never hear your despairation.
The only contact you should except if you want them back is FACE TO FACE. This will take some time as they will need courage. May never happen. Depends how cowardly they are.
Anything less is unexceptable.
In the meantime. Move on. Move forward. Set some goals to get yourself out of debt, loose weight what ever they will notice. Get a new outfit. Remember your outright target must be face to face. So the changes will be seen.
Your ex will try everything to have you dance through some hoops. Ignor them. It frustrates the bejesus out of them.
Finally, if there is absolutely no response from them, they seriously want to end it, but the key is time. Wait and be patient. They always circle back.
Back to resigning. Even when you resign, you always circle back to find out how things are. You always hate it when things are better without you there.
Am I right or am I right, even if they dumped you for someone else. It's Human Nature and you can't fight it.
They want you to know they have there life and are in charge of it. That sometimes means that by dumping you they want to jolt you into realising what you have lost. Sometimes it's cause you have messed up, sometimes it's because they have messed up. What ever the reason they are going or gone.
Here's what to do.
1. Agree with them, don't ask why, don't beg, don't argue just say OK. Have a great life!
Nothing frustrates them more than non confrontation. Whether they texted you, phoned you or just plain left without telling you. Simply say OK.
2. Then go into absolute NON CONTACT.
You have just gained Control of the situation.
If they call to give you a piece of there mind, simply say "I never gave you permission to call me on this number" and hang up. Before they get much out. Interrupt them if you have to. Remember they have rehearsed what they wanted to say over and over and surprise is the key to them. Stop them dead in there tracks.
It's like a resignation from your job. You want to be heard.
Even if your leaving on good terms, you still want to be heard or at least talked out of it. Out of courtesy.
How frustrated would you be if no one did try to talk you out of it. Or wanted to here what they had to say. They just said OK have a great life.
The No Contact reinforces the your "OK" approach and reaffirms you have the power.
It drives them nuts.
The lion may roar, but the lion with the biggest roar is dominant. In this case your roar is your silence.
Remember: If they do not here from you or accept there contact, they will never know how crap and upset you feel. They never see or here your tears, they never hear your despairation.
The only contact you should except if you want them back is FACE TO FACE. This will take some time as they will need courage. May never happen. Depends how cowardly they are.
Anything less is unexceptable.
In the meantime. Move on. Move forward. Set some goals to get yourself out of debt, loose weight what ever they will notice. Get a new outfit. Remember your outright target must be face to face. So the changes will be seen.
Your ex will try everything to have you dance through some hoops. Ignor them. It frustrates the bejesus out of them.
Finally, if there is absolutely no response from them, they seriously want to end it, but the key is time. Wait and be patient. They always circle back.
Back to resigning. Even when you resign, you always circle back to find out how things are. You always hate it when things are better without you there.
Am I right or am I right, even if they dumped you for someone else. It's Human Nature and you can't fight it.