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View Full Version : She wants emotional space - what do I do?


Derrin
Nov 28, 2007, 02:22 AM
Hi (from London)

I would appreciate any advise or personal experience / guidance.

My girfriend and I have been dating one another for almost 2 years. We lived together, along with my two business partners. Working 24/7 and being in a working environment eventually got to her and she wanted to move out. She said our relationship got cumfortable and she wanted to bring the spark back. She thouhgt moving out would make us make that effort and bring the spark back. This was obviously very difficult to accept cause it meant me moving out as well and me being away from the 'office' and work colleagues. So this brought a little tension but we've dealt with this.

The dilema or opportunity (however you like to look at it) I'm faced with now is she is unhappy in her job and is searching, she wants to find herself. Which I've been very supportive. She wants to go do volunteering work in South America for two months. I've been more than supportive of this.

But she has now said she wants some EMOTIONAL SPACE from me. She needs the time to herself. This did hurt and still is. She mentioned the one thing that frightens her is during this time she will lose me. But she also doesn't want to get my hopes up that we will see eye to eye and start building the relationship.

She said lets meet tomorrow, I said maybe we shouldn't. She said don't be like this, let chat about the relationship. She wants to work on it, so she says but doesn't want the intimate/affectionate side of the relationship.

What do I do. I really love the person who she is becoming and love the person she is. She is a wonderful human being and I really want to be with her.

I feel I need to give her space. But I want her badly.

What do I do while she's figuring this out? Do I agree to meet up and continue discussing the relationship or do I give her the space and not speak to her for a few weeks?

I don't want to lose her in this time! Do I have a chance of getting this girl back Body, Heart, Mind and Spirit, in other words 100% committed to us and herself?

Your help would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks
Derrin
:)

Derrin
Nov 28, 2007, 02:30 AM
Do I ask her if I could start dating other women? Would that add some uncertainty for her and then want me back?

She even said that she will come running back one day. I know she has done this with her ex when she couldn't have him she wanted him back.

How do I get her running back 100% committed?

Derrin
Nov 28, 2007, 04:01 PM
Just to add from this morning, she asked to meet up tonight, which I called her back and said maybe it's best that we take our time and honour her wishes to take the space. She admitted that this is tough and she's been crying all day. Woke up at 5am. She's feeling alone.

I'm meeting her on Saturday (3 days time) to chat about the relationship.