I let my husband go on vacation, because he really needs one. I let him go with his friends and I told him I don't like you going with your friends (you always ask me that you like to go with your friends) but you really need one, as long as you don't hurt me in any ways and keep me happy that's fine. When he was leaving I hugged him and I cried saying I missed you, since we married for 10 years we always being to gather we never are a part.
He's vacation to Cuba was for 7 night, he didn't call me since he went, middle of the week I felt so lonely and missed him also worried what happen so I was on line search for phone number to call him I end up calling the hotel, middle of the night but he wasn't at his room so I left a message in his room saying wife call emergency , after I left the message couple of hours later one of his friends called back and ask me if I'm OK, I said yes I'm OK I was just wonder if you guys were OK, and I asked him where is my hubby he didn't answer my question , so I hanged up the phone. Next day around 4:00 pm my hubby phone me I ignored.
When he came back I didn't talk to him but he's face I could read he really had fun and to keep himself busy he had some special person with him.. because he didn't phone me and didn't show how much he loves me and care about me made me realized this is how much he loves me and cares about me past 10 years and future.
He was my life, friend, love basically everything,
Now my heart is broken into two pieces and I can't put them back together. But we are together because I have two kids with him and I need this family life going on good for my kids. But I can't for give him, every day I'm flashing back with those 7 nights without calling me, I'm burring like a candle every day without sharing my heart with him, I feel like he's not there any more. For me and he doesn't belong to me anymore. Also find a new pack of condom it wasn't there before.

My advice... MAKE SURE he is cheating. Look for clues! Just cause he didn't call doesn't always mean he was cheating. Do you guys use credit cards? Get online and check where he spent money (that's what my mom did when my step dad ran off to do drugs). If you guys have cell phones check his phone book (or if he has a pocket phonebook with numbers of friends look in there), if you see a female name you don't know ask some of your friends and his if they know of this girl, if they don't or his friends act weird chances are that's the girl. My step dad has cheated on my mom twice and that's what she did the second time (he has never had sex with another woman but he has sent them flowers and stuff and said he wasn't married).

Sorry for your pain Diane. I know the culture is different in Cuba. It is a macho culture . Some men do things also when they are away with guy friends they might not have done otherwise. Chances are if he cheated it was with a paid escort, i.e.. Hooker. You don't have as much to worry about with his emotional affair in that case as much as his physical straying. He is dead wrong to cheat, I hope he admits it to you with an apology. I hope he is genuinely sorry and never does it again. Meanwhile, he and you need to be checked for STD's. Oh, and don't let him vacation without you again.

Dianne,

Please for just a moment and listen or reread your initial note. Right now you are being driven by fear and projected activities by your husband. You are writing him off for what he did or did not do.

Start again and this time stay with the guy who is causing you the grief. Sit him down and explain your anger and fears and ask him to explain his behavior while on vacation. Ask if he has done anything that would hurt you and destroy your family. If he is Hispanic and a former resident of Cuba then he knows what a vow is and he made a vow to you. Ask him if he broke that vow of fidelity.

You will feel better if you stop assuming the worst. This is your problem, not his and you should get help if you can't see how your blowing this out of proportion. Geez, give the guy a break, and be happy he enjoyed himself, and relax, he's home with you now isn't he. Don't let fear and insecurity ruin your relationship.

Being clingy, needy and insecure is not good for your marriage. I bet he didn't call because he knew that you would.

To be honest, if I were on vacation in Cuba, the last place I would be sitting in is my hotel room. I would take in as much of the local adventure as possible and enjoy all the music and dancing and historic sites I can. I'd want to go fishing too and hook a marlin. How many times would I ever get that chance again?

You started by telling him to go, although you really did not want him to. So you became a bit of a martyr. But he went with his friends and it sounds like he had a great time. Maybe more of a time than what you wanted him to have. I do not know if he was with another woman or not - you do not know either. Maybe he was, but you need to sit down with him and talk about this. Be honest and hopefully he will be honest.

If he did have a one time fling, and he asks you to forgive, what are you going to do? He did not being this woman home with him. He came home to you. I see this both ways - that you are upset and possibly with some reason and that he a long overdue vacation with his friends and was able to enjoy himself. I wouldn't throw him to the dogs.