I've been told that urges could be controlled by some Role Playing, so I though I would create this post for all of us. The holidays are upon us and that's going to prove to be a difficult time for most of us here. A lot of us will be tempted to break NC and take us back to square one. In the interests of maitaining NC, Just type here what you feel about your ex in any form you like (letter, text message, IM, anything you want) it's a good way to get things off your chest and be able to stay on the road to healing. I hope it's something that will be of help

I'm going to start the ball rolling with an e-mail that I have saved in my draft folder to my ex boyfriend. Instead of sending it to him I'm just going to post it here. That way I can say what I need to say without causing any more pain to myself.

Jeremy, On my way home from work today I stopped at Wal Mart. I ran into Jen (remember her and Kelly) she asked me if you and I had ever set a date to get married. I held on to my composure long enough to tell her what happened between us and then make my way to the car to cry. Seeing her caused everything to come flooding back.

I don't know what to do anymore. It's been so many months, but the pain just won't go away. I'm reminded of you almost every day. Whenever I go to places we went together, watch a movie or hear a song that we both liked, or smell your cologne on someone else, it causes an overwhelming heartache that I would never wish on anyone. Even when I'm at the Breakfast Club, if a car pulls in the lot that resembles yours, my heart skips a beat because I hope it might be you.

I know that tonight you'll be holding Misty in your arms the way that you held me, and making her feel the love that you made me feel. The thought of that makes it hard for me to even breathe. I want so much for it to be me. I honestly believed that you would never stop loving me, and I keep asking myself what I could have done to keep from losing your heart. You were the best relationship I had ever had and I I tried so hard to make you happy and be a good girlfriend to you. I guess I'm just not any good at relationships. I keep doing things wrong.

I just want to find something to make the hurt go away. My heart really can't stand any more of the strain. I want to feel good again, and feel happy the way that I did when I was with you. It's not normal for me to continue to feel this way and I'm so emotionally tired because of it. It dosen't help that I'm totally on my own now here at the house. I guess all I can do is pray for God to please help me through. I know that in a way I will always love you.

What a great idea Firefly , I actually don't need to vent anymore myself but I'm glad you got this out of your system and hope it helps you to refrain from sending it. Hopefully other people will come on here and use this thread to do just that.

Thank you so much friend4u, I really hope that it does help others. You're post on "what to expect when you get dumped" was such a big help to me and so many others. I just want to try to do my part. :)

Thank you so much friend4u, i really hope that it does help others. You're post on "what to expect when you get dumped" was such a big help to me and so many others. i just want to try to do my part. :)

My pleasure , and I'm glad my post helped you as well. Hang in there , there are always people to talk to on here either on the forum or by PM.

A letter to my ex?
Dear Dave,
So glad I can celebrate Christmas without you throwing out the tree, decorations, and gifts.

Phillip,
Sometimes when I'm sitting back watching something on TV even after 2 years I expect to see you laid out on the couch but you're not there any more. Those are the times when I realize there is a part of me missing….you. I think about the times even when we were no longer together when you'd say we were meant to be together and you will always love me, and you know I feel the same. I've tried so hard to hate you for giving up on me and turning to another woman but I can't even hate you for that. How can I hate you when it was me that pushed you away. If I had been more open about what I really wanted and why I wasn't ready to live together again, maybe you would have understood and none of this would have ever happened. I know you still love me. I know this because I see it in your eyes. I wonder do you see it in my eyes as well? ………………………………...


I said enough. I would never say any of that to him even if it is how I feel because …. I don't know why, I just wouldn't.

Ok first of all I think this is a wonderful idea firefly. I will probably post sometime later but just reading the letters to the ex's so far has made me start to cry and I don't think I can type anything at the moment. Just about the time I think I'm all tough and strong I cry and prove myself completely wrong.

Dear Andy,

We saw each other at work today, and you smiled big at me. And in that second I knew I still wasn't over you. I still love you as much as I had the day you got down on one knee and professed it to me. I felt your love today and I also felt your wall. I went back to my desk afterwards and I just cried and my chest began to ache really bad. I thought I was being strong, no contact, I tried to get myself to hate you for not being able to handle a relationship right now. But to no avail... I feel like I'm right back where I started. I want to talk to you so bad. There is so much I want to share with you. I miss you. I'm jealous of everyone who graces your presence because I can not. You told me days before you dumped me that you wanted me in your life. How does it feel now? We don't laugh at break. We don't kiss at lunch. We don't go to the movies. No more talks about philosophy, politics, god, or the ring. No more inside jokes. You don't know me anymore. I can't believe your OK with that. It hurts to know that you think you're happier sitting in my aunt's office at lunch making stupid small talk. It hurts me to know you would rather sit at home alone than even be near me. It makes me feel like I did something wrong when all I did was love you the best I can. I know you have issues right now, and that this wasn't my fault. It also scares me to know that if you want me back, you won't bother because you don't know how to ask for what you want anyway.



P.S. I lied.

Dear Ki,

I would like to thank you for everything you have ever done for me. I wish we could have
Grown old together had kids together and been happy together. But I now realize that you and I are on different paths in our lives. I refuse to be dependent on anyone for support when I can support myself. Even though it was fun 90 % of the time I now realize I was not truly happy. I don't need material things to justify who I am or make me proud. I hope you do find true happiness and move on to great things. I will always love u .

Lou

P.S.

Hope all is well with your family.
Tell them I said Hi :>)

Hi Stonewilder, yes, in a way it did help me to get it out. I was so tempted to send that e-mail to my ex, but it helped to just be able to post it somewhere.

I've been having such a bad day today. This time last year my ex decided he wanted to try to work things out with me (we had been broken up a couple of months at that time) We left the night before Thanksgiving to spend the weekend at the beach, which he does every year at this time (He's a Jehovahs Witness so he dosen't celebrate Thanksgiving). We had such a wonderful and romantic time together, and he told me that he wanted to spend his life with me. I know that he will be wanting to take his new girl with him there tonight, and that hurts me so much because he'll be romancing her the way he did me, and I'll be spending my time alone wishing that it was me that he's with.

Hi Stonewilder, yes, in a way it did help me to get it out. I was so tempted to send that e-mail to my ex, but it helped to just be able to post it somewhere.

I've been having such a bad day today. this time last year my ex decided he wanted to try to work things out with me (we had been broken up a couple of months at that time) We left the night before Thanksgiving to spend the weekend at the beach, which he does every year at this time (He's a Jehovahs Witness so he dosen't celebrate Thanksgiving). We had such a wonderful and romantic time together, and he told me that he wanted to spend his life with me. I know that he will be wanting to take his new girl with him there tonight, and that hurts me so much because he'll be romancing her the way he did me, and i'll be spending my time alone wishing that it was me that he's with.




I'm so sorry you have to feel such pain. I know it's hard especially during the holidays. I wish there were something inspirational I could say to ease your pain (and everyone else here) but I guess heartache is just a part of life sometimes. I'm glad you had the idea to post letters to our ex's. It did feel good to tell my ex how I feel even if he never sees it. Somehow we will all get past our heartaches and find love again.

All of the pain that we are feeling is just apart of love. Love and pain go hand in hand. The level of hurt that we are facing shows how compassionate each of us are. It's a great idea to post letters such as this on here. Thanks for creating it. Stay strong.

Just thought this deserved to be bumped

Hey Anna,

I was a little sad because I did not hear from you for the past holiday I was pretty upset. On the other hand you opened my eyes to see that you really are not in love with. I see how cold you are. I see you are looking for something else, something other then me. I see how cold you can be and that's not a attack on you it's just the way you are.

Happy Holidays...

Chris

Dear ex,

It's been a year, and I'm proud to say that I'm totally over you. I'm happy, and currently filled with inspiration, I'm looking forward to my future, and I'm just really happy.

I hope you're happy too!

Kaitou

Dear Sarah

I just wanted to say that I really don't give a damn any more. I'd hoped you'd look at things and work out why people treat you the way they do.
Unfortunately you haven't learned a damn thing and you are still convinced the fault lies with others.
Wrong.
I for one cannot live with someone who thinks lying and stealing are acceptable behaviour.
Your new Fella is truly welcome to you. I wish him well and bear him no malice. But just bear in mind, if your poor Father knew the truth about you, it would break his heart just as surely as it broke mine.
Good Luck for the future.

Huggis1

V,

For weeks I knew I would take you back. It was a no brainer. I didn't even have to stress about it because I knew I would. It didn't matter what you had done. I only knew that no matter what you had put me through it couldn't be worse then living the rest of my life without you. I knew it wasn't possible that your love for me was gone, the bond was just to strong. Lately I've started to resent you. I resent that you took seven years of my life. I resent that you spent all of those years convincing me that this was forever. I resent that with absolutely no warning you walked away leaving me shattered and broken. I resent that when people cut you down and called you a piece of $hit I defended you. I said but you don't understand, he has to have a good reason or he's just confused and doesn't know what he's doing right now, I made excuses for you over and over. I knew you so well and I knew that this wasn't something you would do to me, it wasn't possible. I spent weeks trying to deal with my broken heart and at the same time trying to cope with the constant presents of you in my thoughts. It was torture, it was like my entire mental state was in jepordy. It was acually terrifying not being able to rely on any kind of rational thought. Eventually reality began to settle in a little each day. I began to come to terms with some of the things you have actually done. I know that you left me to start a life with someone that is so f'd up, even her friends laugh at what a fool she's making of you. Now the latest news is you are not very happy in your new found life and I guess that should make me happy. All it really does is make me sick, it makes me sick that you threw away seven happy years for something only four months into it is shakey at best. I do hope you've learn at least a couple things. What goes around, comes back around and that the grass is usually NEVER greener on the other side of the fence.

D.

I was half way through typing out my letter and then I just broke down. I found it so hard to keep it all together, I must still be trying to heal.

Feel quite ashamed with myself now though, thought it would have done me good.

I'll have to give it another go one day soon :(

I was half way through typing out my letter and then I just broke down. I found it so hard to keep it all together, I must still be trying to heal.

Feel quite ashamed with myself now though, thought it would have done me good.

I'll have to give it another go one day soon

Don't feel ashamed because you ARE still trying to heal just like me and so many others of us here. It's just going to take more time, but I promise that you will get there... we all will. And until we do, we're all here to help each other through it. Peace to you my friend. :)

Are you happy da way things are marlyn? Is this how you want it to be? I'm not mad I'm really juss trying 2 get this question answered... is this da way you want things to be marlyn? I remember da exact words I said to you that day be4 u left 2 mexico when we first started going out when I chased after u... I was scared that if something happened to you on your flight lol, that id never get another chance 2 tell you how much I cared about u. it changed our relationship me chasing you around lakeforest... I still remember da way you landed in my arms when I whispered in your ear is this really how you want to go... look I can't go bak in time. I can't rekindle da moments I can't make you love me again da way I somehow still do, I can't stop thinking about you I dream of you and I cry wondering what was. Although I do this everyday... I also think 2 myself maybe this way shell forget me, maybe this way if something does happen it won't be as hard because we cut each oder off... its stupid maybe dramatic,lol its da way I think.im not asking 4 anything... juss trying 2 set things right, when we talk I'm weak, when we don't I'm like da walking dead. Your smiles a factor so is juss knowing your doing OK, I won't have it in 34 days, I won't have it 4 3yrs after that, deyre mite not be an occasion later on when I can try and talk to you. So I'm asking u... is this good for you, is this wats best 4 da 2 of us? If you think it is den you don't have 2 write bak 2 this email... if you want to spend some time maybe create some memories before time runs out... ur da one person I really want to do that with den talk to me, forgive me 4 what I said and yea... I miss u. if you don't write bak ill understand take all da time you need or want, January 4th. Imma visit u 2 give you your things bak if you don't write bak sometime be4 da 4th. If you like things da way dey are gorda... den I really understand kk.

I sent this to her already I don't know what 2 do I'm leaving 4 3yrs 2 go 2 da army.. should I juss leave her alone and kill my feelings or should I try this again?

Dear R,

It's been three months since the break up and I have no idea how you are dealing with the whole situation. I would like to say a few things that have been on my mind for some time now.

Since we broke up I have been struggling to get my life back together and move on. It hasn't been easy and sometimes Im still struggling with it. But I'm beginning to realise that even though you left me I should have left the relationship a long time ago. I stayed and tried to make it work because I thought I could have the old R back. The one that was so giving and considerate and sweet and in love. The R I fell in love with. Now I know that this person is gone for good and is never coming back. I don't know the person you are now. The person you are now made me feel inadequate and insecure. I don't want to feel like this anymore and I don't want to hurt anymore. You left me many times and every time it hurt like hell. I can't trust that you will not hurt me again.

When we met two weeks ago I though I was going to meet the R I once fell in love with. But again you let me down. Even though you realise that you have some issues to deal with nothing has changed. You are still all words and no action. You want everything to work itself out but you are not willing to put any effort towards that direction. That's not good enough.

When I said I would like to give our relationship another try you said that you are still confused about what you want. And this was after 3 hours of you telling me that you changed and that you made a mistake 3 months ago. It was such a big mistake on my part.

Last week I was celebrating my name day. There is this really good friend of mine who has had a crash on me for the last two years. To celebrate my name day she took me out for dinner, called all my friends and arranged for all of us to meet at a club later on. This person is not even my girlfriend. At this point I realised that I deserve all this and so much more from the person that I love. And you are not able to give that to me.

There are days that I do miss you but I guess its because I'm lonely and think of the R I fell in love with. I'm dealing with my issues and hopefully in time I will find someone who will be able to give me what I deserve.

Do you still get the urge to send this to your ex little firefly? I think I would find it hard to resist.

do you still get the urge to send this to your ex little firefly? I think I would find it hard to resist.

Yes Chris, I still do. Especially now. I just found out a little while ago from a mutual friend of mine and my ex bf's, that my ex is talking about marriage to his new girl. I'm having to fight the urge to send the letter, along with an added paragraph or two... I guess right now though all I want to do is have a good cry. :(

Yes Chris, i still do. especially now. I just found out a little while ago from a mutual friend of mine and my ex bf's, that my ex is talking about marriage to his new girl. I'm having to fight the urge to send the letter, along with an added paragraph or two.....I guess right now though all i want to do is have a good cry. :(

Oh right, that sounds a really bad situation to be in, I'm only 21 and I thought my break up was bad, with my 19yr old Student girlfriend. The thought of those situations, which I'm probably going to go through next in life frightens me. I'm just wondering if sending something like this will put that closure on it all, which everyone says we need and that it would be for the best. Or will it push our ex's away for good? That's the question which is stopping me sending it. I won't lie, yeah I do really want my ex back, you do too by the sounds of it hun.

Oh right, that sounds a really bad situation to be in, I'm only 21 and I thought my break up was bad, with my 19yr old Student girlfriend. The thought of those situations, which I'm probably going to go through next in life frightens me. I'm just wondering if sending something like this will put that closure on it all, which everyone says we need and that it would be for the best. Or will it push our ex's away for good? That's the question which is stopping me sending it. I won't lie, yeah I do really want my ex back, you do too by the sounds of it hun.
__________________

Yes, I really do want him back, I'm sorry to say. But honestly, if sending her a letter will make you feel better and put some closure on things for you, then you should send it. I can't say one way or another if it might push your ex away. Just do what you feel you need to do to help you feel better. The only reason I never sent mine is because I knew I wouldn't get a response, and that would only make me feel worse.

Yes, i really do want him back, i'm sorry to say. But honestly, if sending her a letter will make you feel better and put some closure on things for you, then you should send it. I can't say one way or another if it might push your ex away. Just do what you feel you need to do to help you feel better. The only reason i never sent mine is because i knew i wouldn't get a response, and that would only make me feel worse.

Yeah that's the thing, I don't think I will get a response at all. I owed her a bit of money and I gave it her back a few weeks ago, not in person but by online transfer and I sent her a message saying that the transfer had gone through. I didn't get a response though, not even a thanks.

What can you do eh. Think that summed it up. :(

Lets see... since I'm not in the broken heart mode, and I'm happily married, this might not be the original intent of the OP, but I think it's a neat little idea... letters to the ex that don't get sent... kudos on the creativity. My thirty seconds of self indulgence...

Dear jen - I want my music back. Oh, and the last two years of our relationship back too. You can keep the other five. Didn't have to end like that. You shouldve been a better friend. I shouldve demanded more.

Dear breann - I'm sorry it was bad timing for both of us. We could have had a lot more fun together if we both hadn't gotten in our own way. Hope you are having fun with those cowboys in tx. I still smile when I think of you.

Dear nicole - hope he was worth it. Thanks for turning me on to italian women... the one I married is awesome. Next time cover your tracks better.

That was kind of fun.

Hey CM,

Did you know why I left you over and over again? Did you know why you had misery all the time? Because you are a kind of person who never really trust anyone, always have a scheme and count too much on what gains and what loses.

Ohaha, when I found out the part that you lied, you justified that you were afraid to hurt me. I laughed at how stupid you were. I told you "what is the meaning of life when a person can easily BETRAY HIMSELF???". You cried. Too late! I'm gone, eventually you are hurt by yourself again. Never again will you see me in your life.

Im happy like I never was, hehehe hahaha I feel like I have to sing out aloud "Love today" of Mika.

Somebody can compliment you as you have always been a fake, but I know who you are and more importantly you know who you are. You want to treat yourself badly? Go ahead!

Anyway, I'm not holding the garbage, I hope that you will find your-true-self someday.
Take care and have fun!

It also scares me to know that if you want me back, you won't bother because you don't know how to ask for what you want anyway.

I know this thread is supposed to be about posting letters, etc. to you ex, but this line of mafiaangel180's letter is the thing I think I worry most about. I might be taking it out of context a bit, but I always worry that if I keep up No Contact and always act like I'm fine and dandy when she contacts me, then she'll simply think I don't care about her or have moved on and lost interest in her. I mean, WHAT IF, and I know it's a long shot, but WHAT IF she really starts to resent dumping me, and realizes that what we had was special. Then she decides that she would like to come back. And then lets assume that if that time comes, I haven't moved on and would like to still be with her. I'm afraid she won't know how to ask me if she wants me back, or think that I'm not interested because I put on this attitude of indifference.

Great thread firefly, I have a draft I've been writing, but waaaay to long for her so ill start a new one. Writing definitely helps.

Dear Janelle,

Not a single day has gone by I haven't thought of you. I miss you so bad. You always doubted me, and never trusted me, but I only ever had eyes for you. I have never known anyone who could make me happier then you did, or more sad, or angry. I wasn't perfect, maybe I should have tried to be. But I did try to do what I could. On your birthday when you always dread it because you think it will turn out bad. And we were broke, I busted my butt to get you a cake, had my parents throw you a little birthday party because they loved you too, and asked my dad to bbq and make the ribs you loved so much. I surprised you with that. I may not have had money for all the grand things you wanted to do, and I'm sorry that's what you needed to be happy.
You did what you always worried I would. You lied, cheated and moved in with a new guy so quickly. Makes me doubt how you ever felt about me through out our relationship. And hurts because I tried so hard because I thought we loved each other. You hurt my mom who has been a better mother to you then your own, by locking her on the 2nd story balcony and calling the police on her when I was moving out.
It kills me I feel I'd take you back in a heartbeat. Because you don't deserve it. It drives me crazy that everything I thought I knew about you was a lie. And it kills my hope for the future that you could move on and be so happy while I'm still here remembering the person you use to be.

I hope your happy Janelle from now until forever. I will always love you, or more accuratly who you use to be. I hope that guy can give you what you want. And most of all I hope I forget who you are now, the person I've seen in the end.

Goodbye
Love E

I know this thread is supposed to be about posting letters, etc. to you ex, but this line of mafiaangel180's letter is the thing I think I worry most about. I might be taking it out of context a bit, but I always worry that if I keep up No Contact and always act like I'm fine and dandy when she contacts me, then she'll simply think I don't care about her or have moved on and lost interest in her. I mean, WHAT IF, and I know it's a long shot, but WHAT IF she really starts to resent dumping me, and realizes that what we had was special. Then she decides that she would like to come back. And then lets assume that if that time comes, I haven't moved on and would like to still be with her. I'm afraid she won't know how to ask me if she wants me back, or think that I'm not interested because I put on this attitude of indifference.

I think this is every dumpee that has gone no contact biggest fear. I even posted about it in the beginning. As do a lot of dumpee's. I finally just figured that if he loves me enough to want to get back together, then he would stop at nothing to let me know. And if he didn't even try then it must not have been that big a deal to him anyway.

I know this thread is supposed to be about posting letters, etc. to you ex, but this line of mafiaangel180's letter is the thing I think I worry most about. I might be taking it out of context a bit, but I always worry that if I keep up No Contact and always act like I'm fine and dandy when she contacts me, then she'll simply think I don't care about her or have moved on and lost interest in her. I mean, WHAT IF, and I know it's a long shot, but WHAT IF she really starts to resent dumping me, and realizes that what we had was special. Then she decides that she would like to come back. And then lets assume that if that time comes, I haven't moved on and would like to still be with her. I'm afraid she won't know how to ask me if she wants me back, or think that I'm not interested because I put on this attitude of indifference.

In my opinion it's hard to answer that question because I have never been in that situation. However, if your ex ever does want to get back with you then she will try to contact you. When, and if, that happens I feel that all you can do is remain calm, composed, and kind. Don't brag about how great things are and don't be indifferent. When she asks "How are you doing?" simply respond with "I'm doing well. I've just been real busy at work, school, etc. How about you?" I would keep the focus of the conversation off me and instead on her, and hopefully at some point she brings up our relationship.

Aside from this I'm not sure what else to do. Really you just need to enjoy life. It's pretty fair to assume that if your having fun with life she will eventually find out through mutual friends (if you have any). That's something you can't stop, nor should you try too. Conversely, if you go around feeling sad about the situation and telling everyone how much you miss her she will likely find out too, but I guarantee that won't bring her back, just give her an ego boost.

Just relax, be yourself, and move on. I truly believe that if she wants another shot at the relationship she will let you know somehow, and from there you respond accordingly.

Thanks for the answers guys...

The reason I ask is because my ex dumped me 4 months ago after we dated 4 years. It caught me by surprise and absolutely devastated me, because I was very much in love with her and never thought this would happen. We were even preparing to move to a big city together and were selling some of our stuff.

During our breakup we kept in contact the whole time, so there wasn't really any period of solid NC. She was definitely doing most of the contacting though.

To cut to the chase, 2 months after she dumped me she acted like she wanted to get back together. Of course I did too, but I played it like I was busy and had other things to do, and was kind of short with her (I did find out that she made out with some guy though, so that got me kind of angry). Over Thanksgiving we spent a week together and things were looking up. Then I spent the night with her and looked at her phone texts while she was asleep (I know, shouldn't have). I saw she was talking to another guy the whole time when I asked her repeatedly if there was someone else or if she just wanted to be single and play the field. She lied, got caught. So I got mad and left. After that she pursued me a little more for a few weeks, and eventually I called her up and told her I didn't care what happened over the "break," and that I loved her and wanted only her. As soon as I did that, she told me she needed more time and then contact faded away. I then learned she slept with a completely different guy that she apparently really likes. That was 23 days ago. After I found that out, we didn't talk for 10 days (she doesn't know I know though). So far, that was longest period of NC, which she broke by calling me from an unknown # - so I'm wondering, did I already blow my chance to get back together with her? Was that her "coming back around phase?" There really hadn't been a long period of NC before this all happened. You can browse my questions and read my "girlfriend of 4 years" thread if you want to know the whole story.

You know freakinconfused... that's actually my biggest fear.

My ex and I broke up a month ago... after 3 years. Like you, it was completely out of the blue. We had made plans to move in together after graduation to go to grad school together. It was... entirely out of the blue.

We kept in touch a week after the breakup, then I (like you) went through her phone while I was at her place and found out she's been talking to some guy that I was originally suspicious of. I asked. She denied. I got angry. I left.

... she hasn't contacted me since. Although, I do hear that "that guy" has been seen leaving her place in the morning by a mutual friend. I am shocked as she isn't that type of a girl. She has the reputation of a saint. I was her first everything. But the signs are all there... he's always with her, he's talking to her always, he's seen leaving her place often, she's seen driving his car. All this... a week after we break up.

Granted, I haven't spoken to her in 4 weeks. As of right now, I have... no clue what's going on. I'm just doing my own thing... but she's always on my mind. Always.

Freakinconfused & ISneezeFunny: I think you guys need to ask yourself the following question--do you really want to get back with your ex after you know for a fact that she is fooling around with other men? Sure she had the right to see other guys since you were no longer officially in a relationship, but doesn't the fact that she lied to you make you sick to the stomach? Also, doesn't the fact that she was able to make love to another guy in such a short time, completely disregarding what you two had, infuriate you?

I don't know about you two, but if I found out that my ex-girlfriend slept with some other guy after being apart for just a month or two and on top of that lied to me about it then I'd be telling myself "Good riddance!" She obviously didn't care or respect about me that much so I'm not going to sit there and ask her to come back.

Listen fellas, this may be moving a bit off topic but whatever happened to "Real Men?" The type of guy who would never let anybody walk all over him, including his girlfriend. Now I'm not talking about being a jerk or never being romantic, but I'm talking about the man who is confident and says to the girl who treats him wrong "Listen, you screwed up, I'm not going to beg for your love, and most important I don't need you to make me happy. It's your loss and I'm going to find somebody who will treat me right. Later."

There was a time when I cared so much for a girl that I would ignore all the things she did and ask her to come back, without even requiring an apology or explanation. I would call her and tell her "Hey sweetie, I don't care about everything that's happened, I just want to be with you." As a result she would see that I was weak and repeat the same mistakes. Not anymore, sometimes you just have to be a man and let her know she messed up and now she has to live with it.

Ah, I forgot to mention... that I'm not getting back with my ex. Even if she does come back... for all those reasons you mentioned above. I was simply stating that it sucks.


Listen, you screwed up, I'm not going to beg for your love, and most important I don't need you to make me happy. It's your loss and I'm going to find somebody who will treat me right. Later.

Yep. That's pretty much my way of thinking right now.

So yes... am I sad? Yes. Am I angry? Yep. Will I ever get back with her? Not likely.

Dear Whore,

One question baby... How can you sleep at night? After two amazing years, two months away from one another was enough to make you forget about me and consider dating other people. You said you were confused, and maybe you are... ill never know... But I find it ridiculous that after a month with some new guy (and God only knows if you did something with him before we broke up) you can tell him all of the things you told me for two years. We built something so strong... and I can't understand why you would want to mess with a good thing. You also told me that long distance was too hard for you and that you needed someone... At first I didn't think much of it, but if you need to be with someone to be happy and feel good about yourself, then you have got a lot of growing up to do. So how can you sleep at night? After telling me that you loved me and then turning around and saying it to someone you've only known for a few weeks. If you can sleep just fine; then you must be the devil. Can you even think of a low point in our relationship? I can't... I thought you were everything I wanted and part of me still does... But if you feel nothing, then you can't possibly be everything I wanted. But look at the bright side... I can walk away knowing that I gave the relationship my very best shot, and I even tried for 2 weeks to get you back... You can walk away knowing what? That you're a quitter, that being a decent human being isn't worth the effort, that you can't commit, that you're a needy little whore? Anyway, keep talking about love and marriage with your new b/f of one month, it'll only make it harder when you realize that people live in the real world, and only a month of dating isn't enough to know anyone, I don't care how much time you spent with them.

Love me,

P.S. Am I invited to the wedding?

Great thread idea firefly!

Oh my God dude. That kicked @$$!

I wrote a letter very similar to that to my ex and thankfully never sent it because it was my free therapy

Dear exes, Thanks for kicking me to the curb, so I could meet the love of my life.
Love, your ex.

Oh my God dude. That kicked @$$!

Thank you, thank you... (insert bragging tone) yes I'm an English major. Damn it feels good to write it where someone will read it, haha.

Dear Jamie,

How you been doing, girl? Hope you're happy. One question though, I don't know why you would put "sad" as your status when I told you in a blog that I didn't want to be friends with you anymore. If any, you should be "glad". I saved us a lot of months because knowing you, I know you would've only taken me for a ride and I still would've been on the sideline, wanting to take a shot at something that wasn't worth it. I liked how you totally ignored me for two whole months. Not even saying "Hi" in the hallways to a guy you once "loved", but have conversations with some guy till 2 in the morning (by the way, how do you like him calling you every 4 letter word he can think of? I find it hilarious). I thought I loved you, I really did. Haha, do you remember our first date? The one where we held hands, cuddled and had our first kiss? Yeah, I still kept the memoirs because I had some hope that we would get back together. It's funny how you showed me more then one way that I was wrong. Anyway, I made you a valentine's day gift as well as a christmas gift in November. I put the movie ticket where we had our first kiss and the first time I looked into your beautiful green eyes in the stuffed animal that I gave you for christmas. You might like it, you might not; I only know that I don't need any of that anymore. I hope you like it though. I've been filling the empty hole you left with music, my guitar, my friends and my philosophies on life. Thanks for kicking me to the curb, I'll never regret telling you that we're not friends anymore. You haven't met someone that treated you as good as I did but that doesn't matter. I just hope the next guy you meet, you won't smash his heart into pieces. Those were a hassle to put back together, you know? Anyway, I have to go to sleep, got school tomorrow.

P.S.
Looking forward for your quick glances to the opposite direction of where I am whenever I see you. I still smile whenever I think about you, except now it's for a different reason. I hope life treats you gently, my lost friend. This is the last goodbye I'll give you. Goodbye Jamie, it's been great. Peace be with you

Dear ___,

Thank you for never being direct with me about what you wanted and felt. Thank you for not having the courage to tell me you did not want to get back together. Thank you for leading me on and dragging me along for a gruel and agonizing two months. But most of all, thank you for helping me realize once again the reason that I broke up with you.

I'm sorry that I exploded in anger at you for essentially not acting like a boyfriend. We were/are over. I just couldn't accept it. I kept clinging onto the hope that you still cared for me and would want me back.

And don't get me wrong. I know you really did care for me at one point. I even know that you didn't know how to show it and that you wished dearly that you could change. You tried. But I guess I wasn't enough. It was unfair of me to ask you to change as a person anyway.

I'm sorry that you weren't enough for me. I'm sorry you had to see me at my weakest moments. You are the ultimate nice guy. It must have been hard for you to tell me it was over in your own little way. I bet you wanted to just yell at me to leave you alone so many of those times.

Today for the first time, I did not feel any resentment or anger. I'm happy for the experience and memories that you gave me. You taught me what I want and don't want in a partner. Like you said, "we tried our best. There's nothing to be sad about."

I know we said we'd be friends and hope we can someday. I hope you'll overlook my drastic measures to forget you (I'd be flattered if I were you!).

I'm just not ready yet to be friends. Give me time to heal. I hope you'll still want to be friends by the time I'm over you.

Your friend,
______

Thank God I didn't send this! too angry


Hi Bobo,

What's wrong? You…that's what.

First of all you dump me and expect me to be your best friend overnight.

Secondly, you kept rubbing Bobette (his new gf) in my face. Quite frankly I told you I was not interested about hearing about her at all but obviously you didn't listen. Did you think it sat well with me when you kept mentioning her? Even same thing with your other friends…not everyone wants to hear about your intimate details with her. Keep it to yourself. Have some respect.

Thirdly, you put up a picture of her and you just to rub it in my face even more. You NEVER put up display pictures even when I asked you in the past... why now? To rub salt in my wounds?

Fourthly, thanks for lying to me towards the end of our relationship by telling me you loved me when you didn't. You obviously were not faithful, went behind my back without being honest. God knows what you did when I was studying my off at uni for my exams.

Fifthly, you hardly put any effort on our relationship and not even when I tried being your friend. I came last most of the time. Only when I was gone did you only want to talk to me or make an effort. Why? Oh I wonder why! Cause I was so good to you. I was there for you day in and day out. Came down for you when you were sick, bought you things to cheer you up, sent your stuff through the mail, talked and listened to you when you were sad/angry, bought you your meal/movie/drinks last time we met and so many other things I was not appreciated for.

Sixthly, all the threatening emails/messages you sent…if you would have stopped for a second and stopped thinking about yourself for once, think about my feelings. I've been through so much these few months…stop being so f****** selfish. Sure, delete me off everything, throw away all the presents I gave you, the letters, the photos and erase all the memories we had. You don't even have to remember me.

And today, when you purposely called me, you appeared “anonymous” so I would pick up. I'm not interested in talking to you. If I was, I would have talked to you online. How can you call yourself a friend when you have hurt me so much? What have you done to that Bobo I first met? Bring him back!

Don't you have what you wanted? Don't you have Bobette? Don't you have her friends? You didn't want me in the first place. How am I going to make a difference in your life? I respected your wishes, why can't you respect mine? I don't even feel we should even be friends. It's just too hard. It was always about you. Find yourself another 'friend' because I'm not going to be that substitute in your life if anything goes wrong with your relationships.

Hope you have your answer. Stop contacting me anymore unless you are truly sorry…but that doesn't guarantee any friendship.

___________

This is my second letter, but I think I am in a different place...


Janelle,

You hated that I spent most my time playing video games, when I wasn't allowed to do much else. Well I rarely touch them now, I'd rather do the things I love to do. Guess you missed out.
You always thought I would leave you, or cheat, and that you couldn't trust me. When I did nothing but show my love for you. You ended up cheating, and when time goes on I hope that doesn't gnaw at you and make you not able to trust anyone else.
You even hated that I had a temper. When we fought we'd yell and scream. It's hard to not get angry at someone projecting what they are doing on me. I never cheated, I never wanted to. Getting accused of it, just showed what you were doing, and worried I would do.

I hope your instant gratification lasts longer. I hope you get over your issues and insecurities you always blamed on me. I hope your happy and you never realize your mistake.

Because I am becoming the man you always wanted, in my own way. I am living a great life now, even if your still on my mind at times. Maybe someday I'll make someone else as happy as you could have been. Maybe not. But either way Janelle, you really missed out.

Ernie

Ps You can beg for honesty all you want, but when you are a liar, you will never believe your getting it.

Dear ____,

I looked at the letter I wrote to you (above in a few posts) two months ago and all I can say is that I was so kind and considerate. Yet, you screwed me over, AGAIN, that following weekend BIGTIME. I played it cool for your sake, but you mistreated me. You didn't even apologize. I guess you're sick and tired of me getting angry all the time because I got so sick and tired of you.

Have a nice life. I hope you regret everything you did and that you lost me forever. I hope you get the courage to admit you were wrong someday, if not to me at least to yourself.

Except by then, I won't care.

Sincerely,
Me

Since everyone's writing a second one... why not?

Dear sneezy's ex:

Why... how are you? How have you been? It's been a while since I've talked to you... but I've been relatively busy. Heard about your new boyfriend... hope that goes well for you. We graduate in 2 months, which means I probably will never see/hear from you ever again... so I wish you the best. Just wanted to let you know, I harbor no ill feelings towards you. I'm not mad at you... or your new boyfriend. Life's life. May we cross each others' paths again down the road. All the best.

Sneezy.

... that is absurdly different than my first one. I tried to make snide comments, but I have none. Only possible thing I can think of is: I heard your boyfriend's a MAJOR cheater... so good luck with that... and yes, the rumor you hear is true... most of your friends are hitting on me. Pretty hard. Sorry.

... yep. No bad feelings towards her. I feel like I got the last laugh out of this. Oh well.

All I can say is WOW! I think this is by far one of the best threads I have read on this site.

What a great idea!

Unfortunately for this thread, I have no exes worth writing a letter to because currentely I am with the first man I ever fell in love with. If we split then I will deffinintely post here! Hopefully not though.

How about for all those of you who are in a relationship and some things about that person makes you tick? There should be a new thread posted here for all things that you don't like about your relationship/lover.' Maybe I'm going to far..

Dear...

I was the best thing you could have ever had and more...

Me

(To me, that is sufficient.)

You go Isneezefunny! Write away! No complaining though. Just things you would like to be worked out/changed.

Wow! I haven't been around for a few weeks, but I'm so surprised and glad to see that this thread is still around. It was a big help to me to do it and I'm so happy that others here have found it useful as well. I was just re-reading the letter to my ex that I posted to start the thread. I'm so glad I decided to post it here instead of sending it! I can't believe I ever felt that way about someone who treated my heart like it was something that could be played with and then thrown in the dustbin... I almost have to laugh at how pathetic I was then. Thank God for time... it really does heal all wounds. Cheers everyone! :)

Wow! I haven't been around for a few weeks, but i'm so surprised and glad to see that this thread is still around. It was a big help to me to do it and i'm so happy that others here have found it useful as well. I was just re-reading the letter to my ex that i posted to start out the thread. I'm so glad i decided to post it here instead of sending it! I can't believe i ever felt that way about someone who treated my heart like it was something that could be played with and then thrown in the dustbin.....I almost have to laugh at how pathetic i was then. Thank God for time...it really does heal all wounds. Cheers everyone! :)

So glad your doing good now Firefly... it's funny how we look back and think how pathetic we sounded at the beginning , until we get off the emotional "Roller Coaster" ride.

Ya even with the rare bum night, I remember things way earlier and I'm like "wow i was pathetic" Reminds me why I don't like roller coasters lol.

Ya even with the rare bum night, I remember things way earlier and im like "wow i was pathetic" Reminds me why I don't like roller coasters lol.

You know I've never like roller coasters either... I think from now on I'll try to stay on the merry go round where I belong ;)

Hey,
How are you?

I had a dream today.. I fell asleep and everything was back to normal. I believed I woke up and you were there with me, your beautiful smile making me feel better. You put your arms around me and hugged me, but then I really woke up, and you weren't there and I was alone. I looked around to see where you were, thinking you had gone to the bathroom but then remembered that you aren't with me anymore. It broke my heart all over again. It keeps breaking my heart everyday.

I did the worse thing possible to make me feel better.. I started re-reading your old emails... the ones where you told me you would love me forever, and that we could get through this. Im sorry I didn't listen. I saw the pain in your words, a pain that I've been echoing for months. I just let all my guilt consume me, because I couldn't bare having hurt you. In many ways, I deserve all this pain, and you deserve the happiness you have now, even if its without me.

I remember after I left, when you told me that you still saw the love in my eyes. You were right. That's always been my worse part in acting, was hiding my eyes. You've always been able to tell when I lie or not from my eyes. You knew me so well.

In all this, in all the years we've known each other, we've gone through a lot of changes. This is the first big change in my life since I met you that you weren't there for me. Because right now, you're not there for me. I understand though. Im not trying to make you feel bad, or guilt trip you back into this. But when I saw you in December, I saw the same love in your eyes when you looked into mine. Maybe I'm just trying to prove it to myself, but I'm just asking you to not the make the same mistake I did by running away from the love I had. Maybe not today or tomorrow... but I refuse to accept that we're done forever.

Remember that summer when you went away for 4 months? I never did tell you how bad I felt. I used to snap at Andy cause he missed Alexa after a week. I missed you so much.

I was so happy when you came down for Star Wars. I had my baby with me for one of my favourite things.
Or when Tim's dad died, you were there for me, and him. And I loved you even more for it.

I know I've written many goodbye emails. They don't compare to the one you sent me in December. I don't think I've ever cried so much in my life. My brother hugged me tightly that night, as if I was just 5 years old... I saw him crying. My dad is really sad for me too. But then you tell me that I'm doing all this for nothing and that I act like it's a game. Its not. Its my life, a life that I'm clinging desperately to hang onto. And that's the problem.

Remember when you and I went to Boston to see my family? We had barely been together a year. We talked about the future lie crazy kids in love, on a single bed in my grandmother's house. That's the room where I broke down in tears when my grandfather was dying. You made it all better 2 years later.. We visited my grandfather's grave on that trip. I was so sad... and you said you thanked him for having met me. I thank him everyday for that. No joke.

This Christmas was empty without you. You were part of my family. You ARE part of my family. And I could feel you so close, all the great memories flooding me all the time. That's why I was so upset when I emailed you. I just hurt so much. As much pain as we've caused to each other, I know they would welcome you and me being together cause it makes me happy.

I know I'm not easy to love and be with. Im brutally honest and I don't think before I talk sometimes. But I never meant to make you feel bad or guilty for having a life outside of me. But I did... and I know that if I had been a better person all around, I wouldn't be sending you this email.

I realise this sounds like Pedram's last plea email when you broke up. But this isn't a plea. Ive begged enough, and you're not coming back. In fact, you're not even speaking to me at all. Its just an expose of my feelings, my thoughts, my memories, etc...

Im very sad that you don't love me enough anymore to be with me... It's funny, I remember you telling me that line about 8-9 years ago around this time. It was right before Valentine's day, and we had been going out for a few days. We didn't do much... we hardly spoke in fact. I was too nervous. You hugged me at school at my lockers in one of the most heartfelt hugs id ever had. I knew I had lost you then. You followed up with a crying phone call saying you didn't love me enough to stay with me, that you were sorry. After only two weeks, I was so sad. On one of you're emails in September (and you were right, it WAS September) you said I didn't love you from the start that we started going out. But I knew from that day when you broke up with me that I did indeed love you. Time went forward.. you found someone... I was sad... all the time. Once again, during the fall I didn't say what I needed to say to have you and it was too late. You had a boyfriend, you were happy. I was alone. I had pushed you away out of sadness... And I'm doing it again.

I guess I'm just hoping that history repeats itself. I just hope I don't have to wait as long as I did last time. But that's all I've got. Everyone is telling me that I've lost you and that you'll never come back. It seems very possible... but I can't accept that. I need to just hold on to that last glimmer of hope that you can love me again one day... its the only thing that's keeping from going.

My mom was crying on the phone today when I called her. She says that she can't stand to see such a tremendous person like me throw it all away because I'm sad. I don't think I'm that great. Especially not now. I don't feel worth anything, if the one person that didn't need to love but who did unconditionnally doesn't love me anymore, or not enough to choose me over anyone else, than what am I worth now?

I wish I had taken you back earlier. I wish I could be holding you right now. I can't believe that you're over me, but you have always been a much stronger person than you think. And you did. And I'm ed.

You keep saying time will heal all wounds. But this is a scar that can't heal, because everyday it opens up when I remember that I ed everything up and that the love of my life, my best friend, my only lover, is OK with just being friends with me from now on.

I know I said this a lot, but ill always wait for you Caroline. You not only have a place in my heart, but you are my heart. I can't just move on and stop loving you. Ive tried countless times. You may not be perfect, but you were and are perfect for me. For years people praised us as the perfect couple. I just hope one day we can prove them right by making all of this right. I have to hope this. Whether you believe it or not.

I remember when you sent me this song one day. Its always been in my heart when I think of you...

'Ooo. You make me live
Whatever this world can give to me
It's you, you're all I see
Ooo, you make me live now honey
Ooo, you make me live
You're the best friend
That I ever had
I've been with you such a long time
You're my sunshine
And I want you to know
That my feelings are true
I really love you
You're my best friend
Ooo, you make me live
I've been wandering round
But I still come back to you
In rain or shine
You've stood by me girl
I'm happy, happy at home
You're my best friend.
You're the first one
When things turn out bad
You know I'll never be lonely
You're my only one
And I love
The things that you do
You're my best friend
Ooo, you make me live.
I'm happy, happy at home
You're my best friend
You're my best friend
Ooo, you make me live
You, you're my best friend. '


There is no better way to express myself on how I feel about you. Ive been asking everyone why you won't come back to me. I wish I had an answer I can live with. But it seems that I ruined it all, and that you'll never love me again. That is the worse feeling in the world, you have no idea. Im responsible for ruining the best thing in my life, and now, you don't want to come back. I understand, but I'll never give up. You'll always be my girlfriend to me. Chris, the one and only person that knew the reel me and loved me for it. But now you don't. That hurts like you can't imagine.

I'll always love, I love you now. I don't know when ill be able to manage, but I know that I'm not getting over you. Ever. Im sorry if that's not what you want to hear, but I haven been over you for 8 years now. You're my one true love. No one else will ever compare, and I really don't want to have to compare. You win. You'll always win.

forgot this one...

dear Miss Bryan,

you were great in bed, but lousy in the head. Two good years thrown away because you needed a "fix" from another man... and then called me to your bed cause he didn't get you off.

I had your crap packed and out on the curb the day I found out. Done. Bye-bye.

my only regret is getting you off that one last time.


=) man... that feels nice.

Hmm,

You broke up with me and said you don't love me anymore. Then you treat me like for over a month giving me false hope and you then find another person to be with within 3 weeks after a 4 year relationship with me. Then recently you ask me how I am, how my midterms go by text and tell me that in the future maybe I can talk to you again? Wow, you make it seem like it is a privilege for me to earn to talk to you especially after you did that to me. Even as we speak, your act of kindness is sounds so immature. You're not some Goddess to still treat me like that...

I actually still question why I come back to this site, maybe I'm not as over the break up as I thought I was. And I have someone new as well, and things are great, I just still think of the ex quite often, and I cannot help it. As I've said in a previous post, I think I miss who I thought she was, as opposed to who she is now because I know she has changed abit.

Dear ex

Im not in pain anymore, but I still have a massive issue with regard to you meeting someone new so soon after we broke up. In fact, I believe the guy was on the scene before we even broke up, and that just plays on my mind so much, you even said you and him were texting each other the month before we broke up. It was a six year relationship and you have disgraced it by your actions. I know I wasn't the best boyfriend in our last year, but I never hurt you, cheated on you, treated you badly, I just didn't do anything special either, and I know where I went wrong. But nothing I did warranted what you have done. I know you are going out with that guy from work now, I found out recently, and that has just opened up the wounds that were beginning to close. Its been over 6 months now, approaching 7, and I feel betrayed by you even though we haven't had contact in months. I think you left me for someone else , and I don't forgive for it, and don't think I ever will.

I came so close to contacting you recently, I feel like I need you to say something to me like "i didnt leave you for somone else" just so that it helps me, but I know its too late for something like that. It just makes me feel down to know that you were working with the bloke whilst we were together, and he was obviously trying it on with you, or at least letting you know he liked you when we were together, because there is not a chance this all came about 3 weeks after we broke up. That's when I found out about him, because you sent me a text that was supposed to go to him, and you lied, and denied it so much. In fact you lied to me about so much stuff the day we broke up, I even asked you if there was anyone else you said no, but there was, or at least you knew something about another guy.

If this had been a straight brake up, without any of the other stuff on top of it I would be passed this by now, but you had to add more to it, you couldn't just let things be straightforward, and now after so long I still think of us together happy. I am happy with someone else now, and she is brilliant, and I don't want you back or anything like that, I just wish we never were together in the first place as it would have saved my going through what I'm going through now. I feel like the whole relationship was a waste of time, and still can't believe you didn't tell me you had a problem sooner. You didn't even want to work on it, you just told me you didn't love me anymore, and that was it. Well now I know why, because of someone else being interested, and you being interested back.

I don't actually feel any emotion writing this now, its purely psychological, my mind re running old memories for whatever reason, I just wish it was over now, as I've had enough. And I get annoyed at the fact that your proberly living your life now, with your new guy not giving me a second thought. So unfair.

Im not all right with you at all, and if I ever see you again it will be too soon, at least that's how I feel now anyway!

I hate to dig up an old thread, but this is a good one and I think some of the newer people don't know about it :)

This isn't really a letter I'd like to send to my ex, but it's a song which I would really like her to hear/read the lyrics of - but that's not the best idea. So instead, I'm writing it out here :)



Sometimes faith feels like doubt,
And sometimes I wonder if we'll ever get out.
Sometimes life hurts, just like now.
But you got to know its all going to come back around.

I wish you well, I wish you well
On this trip to find yourself.
I wish you well, wish I could help
But I can't help you find yourself...


Not so much sad, but describes my respectful and accepting feelings towards her. Was tempted to put it in a place she would see, but I'll refrain :)

A letter to my ex...

Dear E,

How are you? I hope the consulting job is going well, and the traveling is going smoothly. I'm sorry I haven't called recently. I wanted to contact you so badly, but, I wasn't sure if you wanted to hear from me. Honey, I am so sorry that I said what I said. I really do want to spend my life with you and be your wife. The reason I got cold feet is due to the past; the fact that you kept running away. I was nervous that once I moved to Georgia, and if God for bid we ever had a disagreement, argument, or any situation that couples go through, you would leave or emotionally yo-yo again. Baby, I want to be in it the for the long haul, and I need to feel secure with you, and unfortunately, I didn't because of your prior actions. I don't want you to ever have a wall up with me, I want to know what you need, baby. I know I am emotional at times, but so is everyone, and I am willing to try and keep myself in check, especially with my insecurties. Honey, I really want to talk about us, and reconcile. I know that you are hurt, and maybe you feel that you can't trust me now because I left the relationship this time, but, please let me back in, and lets talk. I have taken you back in the past, I ask that you would offer me the same. The love we have for one another has already been established. Let us please get past this hurdle, work on us, together. I love you, E... more than you can imagine.

PS - I am looking forward to going to the concert and spending time with you. I hope you still would like me there.

Love always and forever,
Karen

I really want to send this to him...

Any advise/comments on this would be greatly appreciated..

Hi Everyone, should I send what I wrote (above) or do you think he would blow it off? What do you think? I don't want to sound pushy, or needy, or anything...

I don't want to sound pushy, or needy, or anything...

... not too pushy.

Needy... a bit.

Starlite, I've been following your story on and off... and it seems to me that the overall consensus on this forum has been, "Don't contact him...wait until he contacts you."

However, you're probably more in the right as no one here knows you, your ex, your relationship, or your situation. With that said, by sending that letter, you need to be aware that he may say multiple things:

1. he might say, OK. Let's get back together.
2. or NO. I hate you. Get out of my life forever.

Or the alternate

I found someone else. Sorry.

... You need to be ready for ALL of these, and by ready, I don't mean for you to say, "Yeah, I'm prepared." But really... be absolutely ready. If you're OK with ANY of these three, then fine. Send your letter. If you're not prepped to hear anything but #1... then you may have a tough time dealing with what happens afterwards.

Hi Sneeze,

You are right... I really want to here #1. I will hold off on sending this to him. I will wait and see if he contacts me down the road.

I know I can't go down the road of 'i should have, would have, could have', but I could have, should have, would have giving this a really great chance. My God, I love this man... I know my fears were valid in a way, but hell, my insecurites probably got in my way too... Dammit!! :( :( :(

I also know that many of us, we feel that if we didn't do that ONE thing, or if we changed that ONE behavior, things would have worked out, then we blame ourselves for it.

In all honesty, you realize down the road that... that's really not it. Sure, you have faults, but the thing we don't realize is how many faults that our exes also had. Faults aren't the problem... it's that the faults didn't mesh well.

Another thing we have to realize is that if we got back with our exes, chances are (there are exceptions... ), those problems will come back. Not within a week, not within a month, but sometime down the road. That's why we take this "nc" time to get ourselves into better shape... to become a better person, then go from there.

Keep your head up. We're all rootin for you.

Hi Sneeze,

You are right...I really want to here #1. I will hold off on sending this to him. I will wait and see if he contacts me down the road.

I know I can't go down the road of 'i should have, would have, could have', but I could have, should have, would have giving this a really great chance. My God, i love this man...I know my fears were valid in a way, but hell, my insecurites probably got in my way too....Dammit!!! :( :( :(

You are very wise to hold off sending that. Having been down that road myself I know how hard it can be to maintain no contact, but believe me that's the best thing for you to do. I made a mistake shortly after my breakup by trying to get back in touch with my ex. He told me that he was seeing someone else and that he was in love with her. Needless to say I was devastated! Don't risk putting yourself through that. If he wants contact he knows where to find you. Just focus on yourself, and remember. As bad as you think things are right now, they WILL get better, trust me!! :)

Thank you Sneezy and Firefly,

You are all so great. I know you are right. It hurts, because, there is always a chance that he may never contact me again... I hope and pray that isn't the case...

Dear Jerk I mean John

Dear John,

I am writing this letter to express my earnest feelings towards you. How could I have ever lived with you? You take my breath away literally! Whenever you speak to me I would almost pass out. Remember that time you whispered in my ear and I passed out? I would never forget that day because I offered you gum and you refused it broke my heart and stomach. How could you do that to me for 2 long years? How could you be so selfish? Again I forgave you for that because I wanted to love you unconditionally but that was not enough for you. I keep thinking I will never find anyone as special as you are. Remember when you wrote me that email and said that you would break up with me for not “believeing you” and I told you that you had it all wrong. You didn't listen to me because you would have known that you misspelled believing wrong. But again you didn't care. I was hurt when you told all of your friends about our sex life, and I was so disappointed that you left out the real facts. I didn't even realize that we were intimate because I was too busy talking to my friend on the phone. Oh remember that promise ring you gave me. That was the sweetest thing you have done, and I am very grateful that you remembered I was allergic to fake jewelry and had to get a tetanus shot from it tarnishing. You really left a loving impression on me in which I will never forget. You love me so much that on my birthday you sent me flowers that had someone else name on the card. I know it was the florist fault. They sent the wrong flowers, even though you were the one who delivered them. Wow! You are special! I just wanted to write this letter to Thank you For allowing me to see what a real looser you are and thanks for being so caring and doing me a favor of breaking up. I was getting really tired of faking it. Anyway, I must go now and celebrate our break up. By the time you reach this I hope you are in good spirits, and tell your new girlfriend she is lucky to have someone like you. I wish I was her right now so I can slap the tastelessness right out of you.

With much Love

Jerk-free

Hi Jolienoire,

That letter was excellent! YOU GO GIRL! :) :)

I am sorry that he treated you that way, you definatley deserve better!

Lol, It is my way of coping when writing a letter to help you get over someone I find that if you instead of putting them on a pedastal write all of the things wrong it helps with the healing process.. This is just from my personal experience, it is not that you are being mean but if it helps your own sanity, then I would suggest it.

... jolienoire...

... where do you meet people like that?!

Fake jewelry. Wrong name on flowers.

... if you're going to be a bad boyfriend, at least be GOOD at being a bad boyfriend. Holy crap.

...jolienoire...

...where do you meet people like that?!?

fake jewelry. wrong name on flowers.

...if you're going to be a bad boyfriend, at least be GOOD at being a bad boyfriend. holy crap.


Oh No, Not me... not with fake jewelry and flowers... But I did write a break up letter it was just a sample.. but you know this did happen to my friend she became vulnerable from her divorce and started to date lets just say men she would have never given a chance...

Dearest Erin,

I watched P.S. I Love You last night and got inspired, you know me =). You don't have to read any further, I will never know, but this will be the last letter. You were right about the movie, it was amazing. I still hadn't really gotten through the denial of what's happened, but watching that let me just cut loose and let out everything I had been keeping in, you would have laughed at how emotional I was. The beginning where he hits himself in the eye and she stubs her toe had me laughing out loud because it reminded me of how things always went with us, whether that be me having to walk around downtown in the beater cause I spilled gatorade all over my shirt or how the movies we went to or rented were always so terrible. I need to let you go, so I wanted to write you this letter, something people don't do enough of anymore. The Duncan jersey is for you to do whatever you wish, for me it's a part of you that I am still carrying with me, so I am returning this piece of me that you left here. When I told Sarah I felt like I needed to write you she got mad at me, told me how life wasn't a movie, and I couldn't agree more, but it should be. Thank you for helping me get to where I am, helping me finish school, and being there for me to support me and let me know that there are a lot of great things in the future. I had an interview with Eli Lilly today and I got accepted to P.A. school at Midwestern, so please, whenever you feel like things are too heavy for you to carry and that things aren't going to work out, I hope that you know how many opportunities there are for you and how successful you will be if you just don't give up. Thank you for all the laughter we had, I haven't ever laughed as much with anyone as I've laughed with you, you truly were my best friend. I've realized that loving someone means wanting someone to be happy, whether that be having that person in your life, or letting them move on to the things that they want for their future. It was a gift and a privilege to learn and grow in love with you. So here is me really letting you go, forgiving you for how things ended between us and telling you how much you moved me, how you changed me. You made me a man, by loving me Erin. And for that, I am grateful. If you could promise me anything, I hope that whenever you're sad, or unsure, or you lose complete faith, that you'll try to see yourself through my eyes. Thank you for the time we spent together, what I've learned will help me more than you know. I'm a man with no regrets and for this, I do feel lucky. When we see each other in our new lives I'll smile at you with joy and remember how we loved and learned for one another.

May God bless and keep you
Chris

P.S. I Love You

(I feel like sending this to my ex, I feel like this would help me release all of the things I'm keeping inside, and give me the chance to resolve the situation on my own terms)

Hi Chris,

That is absolutley beautiful. I actually got teary while reading it. It sounds like Erin was a special woman, and means a whole lot to you. And I'm sure she knows how lucky she was to have had been in your life. If you feel that sending this letter to her would help you get closure, then I feel that is good thing. You just want to be certain that that is really what your intention is. Please don't misunderstand that statement, I do not mean it in a mean or negative way. You just want to make sure that you are ready to let go, and move on from her. Good Luck!

Dear K. I do love you and part of me always will. I do not know what I did wrong that precicpiatated you leaving me. I wish I knew and at the moment parf of me wishes you would come back. I am still in that crazy place where I think I will never meet another woman as great as you(silly I know but that is what I am feeling). I really wish that you would get hit by a car at the moment and I am wishing great harm to your family. Don't worry these are only thoughts not actions and they will pass.

I have been crying over you everyday since you dumped me. I just wish I knew what I did or didn't do. I look at my phone constantly hoping it will ring. I check my e-mail hoping it is you saying you want to take me back. I miss you so much and I love you and it hurts and I feel silly.

We talked about marriage and kids and all manner of things. K. I love you and deep down inside I just want you to be happy. I don't want anything bad to happen to you. You are an increcible, beautiful, smart, funny and lovely person. I just wish you had chosen to stick by me. I want to call you, but I know you will not answer the phone. I know I just need to recognize that you do not want me in your life. I just wish I knew what I did wrong. All the best, Love, me.

Dear K. I do love you and part of me always will. I do not know what I did wrong that precicpiatated you leaving me. I wish I knew and at the moment parf of me wishes you would come back. I am still in that crazy place where I think I will never meet another woman as great as you(silly I know but that is what I am feeling). I really wish that you would get hit by a car at the moment and I am wishing great harm to your family. Don't worry these are only thoughts not actions and they will pass.

I have been crying over you everyday since you dumped me. I just wish I knew what I did or didn't do. I look at my phone constantly hoping it will ring. I check my e-mail hoping it is you saying you want to take me back. I miss you so much and I love you and it hurts and I feel silly.

We talked about marriage and kids and all manner of things. K. I love you and deep down inside I just want you to be happy. I don't want anything bad to happen to you. You are an increcible, beautiful, smart, funny and lovely person. I just wish you had chosen to stick by me. I want to call you, but I know you will not answer the phone. I know I just need to recognize that you do not want me in your life. I just wish I knew what I did wrong. All the best, Love, me.

Hi f104,

That was really well written. How are you doing? How was your weekend?

Hi Star thanks for the compliment. My weekend was okay. How was yours?

Hi Star thanks for the compliment. My weekend was okay. How was yours?

Hi F104,

It was all right. I was thinking of him/missing him all weekend. Tried keeping busy, but he was in my thoughts all weekend. I know I am going to see him in July, and I want to talk with him, and tell him I didn't mean to break up and I didn't mean what I said about me not being able to ever get married or move there, but the truth is I want to, on all accounts. I really need him to know why I said what I said, and understand it. I want to work things out, I just don't want him to yo-yo any more. I know, because of the way he is, when I bring all this up and say I want to have us back, he will most likely say 'I'll think about it" then weeks/months may go by and he will either say 'No' and then all of a sudden come back months later. I really hope he still feels the love for me, and this has a positive outcome this time... I don't know how to get through to him... Being a man, do you know how I should handle this?

I'm sorry for going off on a tangent... How are you? How was your weekend?

I really hope he still feels the love for me, and this has a positive outcome this time...I don't know how to get through to him...Being a man, do you know how I should handle this?

I think there's nothing you can do to control another person. He's proven his yo-yo behavior over years, so it seems to be a part of his mo. I think the best thing you can do is have a busy life and if he comes around, so much the better. But you can't revolve around him.

However, I know it's easier said than done. Believe me, I know.

Hi freeatlast,

You are right, and that is the thing. I don't want to control him, I want him to come back because he really wants to. I just love this man so much, and I really wish he would look inside of himself and see why I said what I said. I don't mean to lay blame on him, but that was the reasoning behind my actions. I want to work on things, together...

Hi freeatlast,

You are right, and that is the thing. I don't want to control him, I want him to come back because he really wants to. I just love this man so much, and I really wish he would look inside of himself and see why I said what I said. I don't mean to lay blame on him, but that was the reasoning behind my actions. I want to work on things, together...

Hi Starlite,

I think one thing you need to do is stop beating yourself up about what you did or didn't say. The way that guy reacted to you is not love. It is quite understandable that you would react with cold feet after all of his yo-yo behavior. If he had reacted in a loving way, he would have discussed with you your fearful feelings and would have eased your concerns, explaining why this time was different and why you could count and rely on him. If I really love a woman I don't give her ultimatums and snap at her and make her feel ashamed about her feelings. Honestly, I don't think he is treating you well and it is very manipulative.

You shouldn't be second-guessing what you did. True love doesn't get derailed that easily. And he even told you that he couldn't guarantee you that he would want to stay with you even if you got married. What you did was reasonable- you need assurances, especially considering the past. He should be ashamed of himself for the way he has been treating you.

Thank you Free. I really appreciate your feedback. You know, you are right. I know I love him, but, you are right, this is his M.O. and he should be more of a man and step up to the plate if he really loves me. (I don't mean that to sound needy). It really, really hurts that I am always the one who has to make things right...

Thank you Free. I really appreciate your feedback. You know, you are right. I know I love him, but, you are right, this is his M.O., and he should be more of a man and step up to the plate if he really loves me. (I don't mean that to sound needy). It really, really hurts that I am always the one who has to make things right...

I think this is an interesting situation and completely polar opposite from the situation that I was in. In my situation, the girl was convinced that I wanted other women and didn't find her attractive. Maybe I somehow contributed to it inadvertently, I don't know, but she was intensely sensitive about everything, and no matter how many assurances or acts of love, flowers, notes, or whatever, nothing was enough of an assurance. I realized that it was useless to beat myself up over what I should or shouldn't have done, things would have been the same with this particular person. It's her problem, not mine.

In your case, the guy is definitely not stepping up as a man and giving you the assurances you need to give him a commitment. And he's got you so confused and distraught, that you are blaming yourself and second-guessing everything you've done. You need to come to the general realization that this is the way he is and there's nothing that you could or couldn't have done that would change this situation.

Frankly, it doesn't seem that he has much respect for you or your feelings.

I think this is an interesting situation and completely polar opposite from the situation that I was in. In my situation, the girl was convinced that I wanted other women and didn't find her attractive. Maybe I somehow contributed to it inadvertently, I don't know, but she was intensely sensitive about everything, and no matter how many assurances or acts of love, flowers, notes, or whatever, nothing was enough of an assurance. I realized that it was useless to beat myself up over what I should or shouldn't have done, things would have been the same with this particular person. It's her problem, not mine.

In your case, the guy is definitely not stepping up as a man and giving you the assurances you need to give him a commitment. And he's got you so confused and distraught, that you are blaming yourself and second-guessing everything you've done. You need to come to the general realization that this is the way he is and there's nothing that you could or couldn't have done that would change this situation.

Frankly, it doesn't seem that he has much respect for you or your feelings.

Thank you Free. You made another valid point when you brought up your relationship. I am a very sensitive women, and insecure. I have been working on this for years to overcome this, and I have gotten better (granted still not a 100%). My ex does recognize that I am like this, but agreed that I have gotten better. But, when he acts the way he does, and yo-yos and keeps me at arms length, even now with the current situation and my breaking up, my insecurities surface more... I ask myself, is it me that he acts this way, etc? I also got nervous this time around, because of his past yo-yoing that I started to ask him 'you won't ever cheat on me will you'? I hope to God I didn't screw this up... I hope I didn't push him away, also to the point that caused him to call me a 'project' (a month ago when we broke up). I hope that he still would want me back and marry me, etc.. I hope I didn't ruin it...

I ask myself, is it me that he acts this way, etc? I also got nervous this time around, because of his past yo-yoing that I started to ask him 'you won't ever cheat on me will you'? I hope to God I didn't screw this up...I hope I didn't push him away, also to the point that caused him to call me a 'project' (a month ago when we broke up). I hope that he still would want me back and marry me, etc..I hope I didn't ruin it...

No, No, No, NO. Listen to me and repeat back to yourself. No man alive who is intent on marrying a woman acts the way this guy is acting.

No, No, No, NO. Listen to me and repeat back to yourself. No man alive who is intent on marrying a woman acts the way this guy is acting.

Thanks Free... I hope he will wake up, and see that I do really love him, I hope he loves me back (on the same level)

hello everyone... just thought I would let you know how I am doing. Well I did write out that letter and send it in the mail. The response was an e-mail telling me how she had fallen in love with the guy she was with, which saying that after one month of the last time she told me how much she loved me just shows that I was with someone who certainly doesn't know what love is, or she was a liar, I'm guessing both. What is really hard for me now are the constant people coming up to me when I go out telling me about her drama and her past, a past which includes a lot of things that I never even knew about, so it's like getting punched in the face all over again when I hear that stuff =). One funny thing I found out is that the last day she told me she loved me, she called before she was going up to her boyfriend's families cabin, so the amount of manipulation from this person was just incredible. It's so hard to step into reality and allow yourself to accept that the person you thought you loved, really isn't anything like that person. But I'm trying! And I am trying to understand that I deserve something great and someone who would give just as much to me as I gave to her. I've been doing some good things, I'm looking at jobs for Eli Lilly in California, Florida, and Illinois, now is my time to get out and see the world, learn about everything I can, make myself a great guy, and let go and let god! Going to try to quit smoking, really need to! Anyway, I still miss that girl everyday, even though she lives with some guy, eeek, but this place has been a godsend. I appreciate everyone who is able to open up their heart and soul, letting themselves be vulnerable and helping all of us grow. Thanks to everyone and I hope that as I heal, that I will be able to help those who will be on their way to the help desk =).

I think that this was a good idea firefly

Jesse,
I sit here and wonder how or why I fell for you like I did. You said that you loved me. Would always be by my side. You were the one that was planning our future together and when I went along with it, you said I was moving too fast. I am so glad that it is over. I no longer call or answer your calls for a reason but you just don't get the hint. Your no longer keeping my heart or mind hostage. I'm done with you. As I think more and more of all your games, I realize how lucky I was to actually lose you. I no longer have to be on my toes with what or how I say what I do. I have a true shot at happiness that you didn't care enough to provide me with. You will no longer be the first thought in my head when I awake or the last thought when I go to bed. I deserve better than you and now I actually realize it. So no, I will no longer come to your rescue when you need someone to talk to or need help of any type. I changed jobs for a reason, to get away from you and that's the way it will stay. Have a nice life!

Great letter confused1145

Dear C,

Looking back, I could never have imagined finding someone as amazing as you. I love your smile, and your beautiful blue eyes. I could stare into your eyes for hours, feeling your deep love for me refecting back. You will always be in my heart, you were my first in many things and I wouldn't take it back for a second. You taught me so much about myself and I am deeply grateful for that. You were my night and shinning armor and I truly thought that we were going to be together forever. But I don't think it was in Gods plan for us. God wants us to work on ourselves now and to move on and find the people that are right for us. I wish you luck my love, I will never stop loving you.

N

Dear ****,

I thought I knew what it was like to miss you, but I had no idea.

It's been one month since you ended us. Some days it feels like a lifetime since I was with you, but most days I can still picture your face smiling before me, your voice in my ear – I loved your voice, it was so comforting to me - and I can still imagine your arms around me when I lay in bed each night.

I'm so sorry for off-loading all my issues on you. I've never been one for talking to my friends – I've always been the one giving the advice and help - but you **** you were truly my best friend for those 7 months we knew each other, and I think it's so sad that I'll never get to talk to you or see you ever again. I know I never really talked about my issues and all even when I wrote you that letter months ago letting you a little bit into my mind – but I thought someday you would be the one person to truly know me and support me.

I never had a real relationship before I met you – you know that. I have always been the single one in my group of friends, and I've always had lots of male friends. There's obviously something about me, which most men don't like - but whatever that is, thank you for overlooking it enough to be with me for seven months. After a year on match.com, I lost count of the number of dates I went on and never heard from the guys again. I always was curious why they would say they had a great night – but then never contact me. I'm obviously missing something that other people are seeing. Maybe you eventually saw whatever it is too.

However, when I was with you, I felt special. I felt beautiful for the first time ever. When I was with you, I believed that you thought I was beautiful and attractive and it didn't matter that I didn't have the slim body that all my other friends have (which is why I suspect most guys don't like me). You helped me feel normal for the first time ever. I felt comfortable being the real me for the first time. I didn't feel like I had to pretend to be anything other than myself when I was with you. I was comfortable being with you, being naked with you – which I never thought would ever be possible for me. Even with the guys I had been with before you I always felt like I was pretending, and I never felt totally comfortable with them. When I met you, I finally found out what it was to be happy, and normal.

I miss you every day, and I guess it does not help that I have to pass your house twice a day and I can't help but look up at it and remember the many happy times we had together there.

My grandfather died the week after you finished with me (which I think you'll agree makes the month of July 2008 a pretty sh1tty month for me!). All I wanted to do was call to your house for a hug, for some company. I miss that. I miss being with you. I miss having someone to give me a hug, someone to kiss me, someone to call before I go to sleep at night. I miss lying on your bed, and falling asleep in your arms – because I felt so safe and comfortable with you.

I hope that I am on your mind and that when you look at things you are reminded of me. The only reason I hope this, is that this is how it is for me. Everything in my life reminds me of you.

Where I work reminds me of our first date, reminds me of sitting in Starbucks and you giving me my Christmas present, and reminds me of meeting you for lunch all those times. My job reminds me of all the many emails I got from you. The silly pictures or stories you sent, and the many emails where you told me how much I meant to you. I have deleted all your emails to stop myself from reading them every day, but I still remember them. Especially the ones so early in our relationship where you told me that it felt right, that you were crazy about me, that I made you feel special, even stupid comments about you liking my lady garden(!), and that I'd do just the way I am.
When you wrote "I think you'll do just the way you are", you have no idea how happy that made me. I have spent my entire adult life wondering what I'd have to change to make a man love me - and you just accepted me as I was.

Being in my flat reminds me of you. It reminds me that I wanted nothing more than to be close to you – that's the only reason I moved there. Possibly that's a bit stalker-like – but I loved you and wanted you to be close (and you said you didn't mind! Hehehe). The flat reminds me of the times I attempted to cook food but you had to take over. It reminds me of the laughter we shared when you would slag me for my lack of cooking skills – I loved that. It reminds me of lying on my sofa wrapped in each other and you saying how much you loved just being with me. It reminds me of my birthday and opening my presents. It reminds me of your birthday when I spent a day wrapping presents for the first person I ever loved. It reminds me of falling asleep with you and waking up with you – and how much I loved that. It reminds me of how happy I was when my days began with you waking me up by kissing me.

My flat reminds me of you taking away the only thing in my life that made me happy. Every time I am in my room, I'm reminded of you sitting in my chair trying to justify why we could not be together. Now when I lie in my bed I am flooded with the remembrance of the shock and utter devastation of the moment you said we were over.

I spent so much time in the first few weeks after you finished it questioning our entire relationship. I have so many questions that I know I will probably never have answers to, or even if I got answers, I probably wouldn't understand them. I kick myself - which is impressive given my history of injuries :o) - because maybe I should have seen it coming. Maybe if I could convince myself that the relationship was not as great as I thought it was, then maybe it would be easier to get over.

How long before the night you ended it had you been thinking that it was coming to an end?
How long had you been contemplating the possibility moving cities without telling me?

I wish you had just been honest with me. I wish you had been able to drop even the smallest hint that you were so unhappy with your life. I wish I knew why you stayed with me as long as you did if you knew it wasn't going to last. I wish you knew how much you meant to me. I wish you had ended it much sooner – instead of letting us become my longest relationship, before letting me fall so in love with you. I wish I knew why I loved you more than you loved me. I wish I knew why I could'nt be a part of your life. I wish I knew how I could be so oblivious to what was going on in your world. I wish I had realised that I was not important to you, and evidently wasn't part of your world. I wish you hadn't made me love you. I wish you hadn't gone on holiday with me a week before dumping me - and given me all those memories which once happy are now so sad. I wish you had considered the fact that every day we were together I loved you more and more.

I still do not understand, and to be honest I do not think I ever will. I want to believe that you did love me. I think you did for a little while at the beginning, but whatever bit of love you did have for me clearly faded. Because if you loved me the way I loved you, you could not have just deleted me from your life.

I feel so stupid and naïve for falling for you, and believing that what we had was special. I feel stupid for thinking that we were a good match. I feel stupid for believing you when you said at New Years that this year was going to be good because we were together. I feel stupid for gloating to all of my friends the weekend before we went on holiday that we were going great, that we had no problems and that we were so in love. I feel stupid for going on that holiday with you. I feel stupid for taking pictures of you and me together. I feel stupid for telling everyone when we got back from holiday that it was great, that we didn't fight once – and I feel incredibly stupid for thinking that was such a great thing. I feel stupid for believing that the fact that we could spend all that time together was a great sign. I feel stupid for being so blind to what we really had.

Maybe it's because I was 24 when I met you and had never been in love. Maybe I wanted to be in love so bad that I invented this great relationship in my head. Maybe it is because of my depression that I convinced myself I was happy with you – maybe I thought I needed something/someone external to pin my happiness on. Maybe it is because I had 4 years alone before you that I fell for you so hard because you showed an interest – which was so unusual to me.

Maybe you could tell me that my view of what we had was not just in my imagination. Maybe if I knew that you thought we were good together, that those seven months were not fake, maybe I'd have some comfort knowing that what we did have was as real as I believed it to be.

Though, on the other hand, knowing that you thought that what we had was as great as I thought and that you were still able to throw it away would be hard to take in. It makes me sad that you might have just been using me to pass a few months of your life until you decided what to do. If I think of us that way, a little piece of me dies.

Having been single my whole life, I knew that I would have my heartbroken eventually. I did not expect my first love to be the person I spent the rest of my life with – that only happens in Hollywood films. Nevertheless, I had sooooo hoped that I would get to spend more that seven months with my first love. I never trusted anyone enough to let them in my life. I trusted you with my whole heart, and you broke that trust.

I remember how much I missed you last December when I was with my family for Christmas – even though we'd only known each other a few weeks. I was so convinced that we would last that when I booked flights home for Christmas 2008 in June I only planned to go home for a couple of days because I knew that this Christmas I'd miss you even more than last. That is how blind I was! I was so convinced we would last a year! How mental is that!

I guess that's also quite pathetic and sad on my part! I had such a different view of what we were. You were the most important person in my life. You made me feel special and beautiful for the first time in my life. I honestly thought I was important to you. I don't think you really know how happy you made me.

I know relationships end and people move one. Break-ups happen every day all over the world. So I'm not unique in the way I'm feeling. And God I've been the shoulder to cry on for enough of my friends to know that time is a healer. But all logic and reasoning goes out the window when it's you. I will get over you ****, and I know our lives are separate now. It is sad, but it was your decision. And however much it kills me, I have accepted that.

I wish I could know if you have missed me at all since you ended us.

Even though I'm heartbroken, I can say that I'm kind of glad that I can now say I've been in love. Finally, at 25, I know what it's like to love someone. Unfortunately, I also now know what it's like to have that love taken away. Hopefully I will learn from this. Maybe when I meet the next guy (in another 4 years or something like before I met you! Hehehe) I'll not jump in headfirst like I did with you. I'll not wear rose-tinted glasses and think everything is great. I will hopefully learn how to view relationships realistically. I guess I never thought you could just walk away from loving someone, but now that you've shown that's possible, next time I'll be aware that it could end at any moment.

There is a point to this rambling other than repeating how I feel about the situation, and this is it... I do hope that wherever you have ended up that you are happy. You kept saying on the night you ended it that you hadn't made any decisions. I guess I would be interested to know what decisions you did make. Did you find a new job? Did you move up north? If you did move up north, I hope you are seeing your family and friends often - seeing as that was apparently your main reason for moving.

I'm going to believe that in some way, at some point you did love me ****. If that is true, then thank you for loving me. Thank you for letting me love you. Although in the weeks after you ended us I was at the lowest I'd ever been, in the seven months we were together I was the happiest I'd been in all my life.

I'd like to hope that at some point in the future be it in a few months, or even years, that you'll get in touch to let me know how you're doing and what's happening in your life, because I'll always care about you.

I honestly did believe that loving someone was enough – but apparently, life is more complicated than that.

Bye ****, take care of yourself.
Love always,
M

Wow!!

Well said, mdornan.. . how do you feel after writing it?

I guess it was a little bit of relief - just to get it all out of my head.

Jeez! I never thought I could write soooo much! I'm surprised anyone bothered to read it all!

I actually spent today writing it with the full intention of sending it to him. But then I thought "what's the point"... so I found here to leave it.

I guess if I'm truly honest with myself, if was to send it to him my hope would be that he replies saying he's sorry, that he didn't mean it and that he wants to be with me again.

But I know deep down that that's not going to happen. I know full well that if I did send it to him he wouldn't reply.

Hopefully by putting it out here other people going through something similar can get comfort from knowing that they're not the only one feeling that way - as that's what I felt when I read some of the other posts on here.

It's still taking all my will power not to send it to him - because the night he ended it I was too shocked and emotional to say anything. He just said his excuses and left and I haven't seen or heard from him since. I never got to say what I felt. I wish he could know how I feel.

Everyone should write a letter like this - I think someone else on here referred to it as "free therapy" - and that is a great description!

:o)

I won't even attempt a letter! LOL
a) too much to say
b) too much thoughts/feelings

To the lying, cheating, pathetic, insecure, controlling, no good, manipulative, heartless, inconsiderate, waste of space, scum of the earth, loser that came into my life and didn't leave until he had turned everything upside down...

I can't thank you enough. But I am sure Karma will. :D

Me

Dear *****,

I wish within my heart of hearts that things did not have to end like this. I never meant to put you second in this, but I did. I was selfish and didn't think about how my actions would affect you. I remember the days of old. The days when we were happy and never hid anything from each other. I remember when you would look into my eyes, and I knew without a shadow of a doubt that you loved me. With you, I felt like I could rule the world. You held me up when I wouldn't walk, and picked me up when I had fallen. I never really knew what it meant to love someone until I met you. I remember when we met for the first time, you had me from hello. You took me and made me into the person I always wished I was.

I know it's not always possible for everyone to live their life and find their absolute heaven, but I know I sure did and I thank you for that. You loved me like no other, and you never stopped until the end. You believed in me when no one else did. Every time I looked up, you were there beside me. Whether it was good, or bad. I want you to know, that I'm next to heaven when I'm next to you.

If I must do this, I will, but please know that I can't come back like before. This is the end, and as much as it saddens me, I have no other way for this to play out.

Dear S,

You said you were my family, you and Mister Nin. Do you know how heartbreaking it was to watch you walk away? No, you don't, and now you are gone, and Nin is gone, and my family is gone. And I'm here, because you left me behind, when I never left you behind. Remember when you had no job or friends and you said I was on the lifeboat and I was sailing away? And I said, don't worry S! I'll never sail away! Jump on the life boat with me! I said that to you. And then when you did get a nice job and some nice friends... you left. You left and you blamed me for everything. And I took it to heart, I believed you when you told me it was all my fault, even though everybody who heard about it told me that was dumb, that it took two people to mess things up, I still took it to heart.

Sorry for the things I did wrong. But you did still leave me behind. I hope you make it worth it.

I don't want to be found anymore. I used to be. But you would never find me in the way I wanted you to, you would just find me and bring me pain. And since you'd never find me like that... I guess I don't want to be found at all. I don't want anymore pain from you. I just want to be free.

There hasn't been a day gone by when I haven't missed you and that sucks. But I'll never tell you that, and I'll never let anyone else know it either. And I'll keep my head up knowing that the day will come when I won't. I do wish you the best, but I don't think I can see you again.

Goodbye S

Jai

Dear Britt,

I remember the first time I spoke to you. How shy I was and nervous. Looking into your eyes and feeling my heart flutter. How you would bring a smile to my face by just looking at me. Those feelings I felt were the best I have felt so far. You looked me in the eyes and told me how you much you loved me and how I was the best boyfriend anyone could ask for. If I was then why did you leave me? Why did you kiss that guy and say sorry I have stronger feelings for him? Do not answer because the answers I seek will only proceed to hurt me.

I gave you everything and anything without so much as a hesitation. I was there to take you to your friends when you and your father fought. I lied to your father's face because you begged me not to tell him you had sex.

The signs appeared rapidly and I did not have time to realize them. You were kind enough to let me go before I was hurt worse. You tore something from my soul that day something I thought I would never be able to regain.

I have thought so much about you and kept myself from pouring those feelings out to you. I do forgive you and do still love you from the bottom of my heart but I know we can never be as you do not feel the same. To see you now would set me back and crush my slowly mending heart to pieces again.

You gave me a year and half of nothing but great memories as I hope I did you. I will hold a place in my heart for you always. Britt thanks for the memories and I know it was not all a lie but people change as I have in the past three weeks. I wish you the best in life and hope you never deal with this pain. I wish you to stay with terry and be happy for the rest of life also wish your family the best.

Goodbye Britt.

"D.B"

I went out with you against my better judgement, forgave you for abandoning me when I was pregnant to dillydally with your ex and as I'm sure you remember we were so happy in our honeymoon phase. I was all too happy to be with someone I'd dreamed about being with and you were so happy to be with someone you liked so much-that was so grateful to be with you.

I remember the first time we fell out like it was yesterday, I remember telling you about how to communicate properly, I remember you telling me that you felt a weight had been lifted because I showed you how to effectibvely deal with problems. You called me your sunshine. I thought that was the end of silly arguments and break ups but you didn't stop.

You kept causing arguments and breaking up with me for silly reasons. Apologised and told me you'd do better. I was naïve enough to believe you-up and down we went. Me crying, you apologising. I remember the day you told me you were thinking about getting back with your ex- I told you I'd understand if you did. You said you didn't mean it. We argued about her so much and you convinced me it was me you wanted me I guess I really believed it that time you said "I love you Lola" in your sleep.

But you didn't stop, remember before we went out you said if I brought any drama you'd end it straight away? I never did it was always you. You're 21 I'm 17 but I was always the mature one, the reasonable and rational one. You acted up so much, you were posessive, you were aggressive. I had enough. You humiliated me that night on new years eve in the club. How could you break up with me like that in front of everyone? Then the next day we met and I saw a change in you, and that is the only reason I decided to give it another shot, it's like it finally hit you what you had with me,

It wasn't to last though was it babes? The next day who talks to me? Your ex. What does she say? You'd been cheating on me with her. AGAIN I left you, you proved to me you meant what you said and you hadn't been talking to her. I guess I thought and wanted to believe you've changed. You didn't.

I remember June the 2nd when you said you "didn't feel the same anymore" I remember how much it hurt that I'd stuck by you through ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING just for you to say that to me. Most people's pain ends there. Sacrificed so much for a relationship not worth it-they break up and it hurts but that's that. No it gets worse for me doesn't it babe, that was barely the beginning of my heartache.

I find out you'd been seeing your ex for nearly a month before you split with me and THAT'S why you brokeup with me. Found out you still love her and NEVER loved me. All the time I thought you did- I still ca't believe it. I told you so many times to tell me if its her you wanted you didn't, you strung me along knowing I was in love.

Then I find out from HER you'd slept with someone behind my back. You didn't care how much it broke my heart "get over it" you said when I told you I knew. I didn't ever talk to you but it wasn't enough for you to know you broke up with me, broke my heart by cheating on me, being with your ex all the time during and straight after our relationship. You talked about RESTRAINING ORDERS for NO REASON, other than to HUMILIATE ME. THIS IS ME YOU SAID YOU WANTED TO MARRY, ME THAT YOU LOVED??

It gets worse. I miscarry our baby I didn't even know . Do you care? No. Of course you said I'm an attention seeker. When you found out it was really true after faffing about for weeks we meet up and I thought you'd really look after me then. But you couldn't be arsed, that was as much support I got from you who I called my best friend, who called me his BEST FRIEND. Do you know how much that HURT AND STILL DOES?? I literally gave you my world and didEVERYTHING to make us work, FORGAVE you through my pain and I lose our baby and you sit around your ex that you sworrrrrre you didn't loves house eating chinese while I lay in hospital, alll the times I was there you never came to see me. All the things you said about me, telling everyone I'm fat when I'm a 34" 28" 37". Your ex always asked me what I did to you for you to behave abhorrently, I give you the answer you always gave me when i used to ask you what id done to you for you to treat me so abhorrently.

NOTHING.

Now i'm alone, I hate you but I love you, I think of you all the time, dream of you all the time, I miss you so much it takes my breath away. I talk about you sometimes, people laugh at all the things we did together, we're such funny people, they laugh at our jokes and everyone agrees we are so compatible. But you ruined everything. Turned my world upside down. Remember when you wanted to date me and you said "you should get with a nice guy like me for a change" because I told you about my unkind ex. Look how nice you were? I put myself through so much for you to be happy. I have to watch while you parade around with your ex, I've seen the converstaions you know, "you know you're the only girl for me" do you know how that FEELS? Instead of asking me if im ok when i miscarrired you were saying that to her and despite EVERYTHING you've done, there's nothing I want more than to have you back. To see your family, to get the number 5 bus to come and see you, It hurts when i see that BUS. You've let me down so badly, and unlike most people. YOU.JUST.DON'T.CARE

I've lost 2 of our babys and you said "no point crying over spilt milk.

I never want to see or talk to you again. Most days I don't want to crawl out of bed because you've made me feel so bad about myself :( like I'm unlovable. I trust no one now. I hate knowing you're with your ex all the time I HATE IT. You took her on holiday with the money you saved for us to go. You've emotionally and mentally abused me you've neglected me and I am SO . HURT. I look fine, no one knows how much you've destroyed me though, least of all... you

I don't know why. I guess I never will

Goodbye

"D.B"

I've lost 2 of our babys and you said "no point crying over spilt milk.



Im sorry babe. =(
I'm so glad you reached me on myspace though.
you know I'm always here for you if ever need to talk to me!

... me thinks I write a letter to my ex now...



"Bebby."

It amazes me sometimes how good people like me and BorisTheBlade get hurt.
And we get a respone like "no point in crying over spilt milk." when we lose a baby...
I never wanted to hate a person I loved so much. I'm always doing things to better myself. College.gym.work. And I'm just waiting for one thing for you to better yourself. But you haven't. The only bad habit that I picked up, was smoking again. But that's just something small that I can always quit. Something I can't quit, is you.. I guess.. I have great friends, and an amazingly bright future. Why would you drop that for some bimbo? I laugh, because I know, I KNOW, I can do the same things those girls do for you, but even better. I know I sound conceited, but after two years, I know what can make you sing, and what can make you cry. And I don't use it against you... you've emptied my closet, and threw out my skeletons for the whole world to see. I've lost friends.. but I finally am free. My soul is clean. I still have something to thank you for, even after all the crap you've put me through. Thank you. a$$hole.

Sorry to hear about the pain ladies, but trust me, it does get better.

Here's a second one...

Dear *****,

I left on Saturday, just as you asked. I get back to this place that we used to call home, and it's awful being here. Everywhere I look, there's another memory that I have to try and drink away or burn down. You tell me that you don't want to be with me anymore, but then send me messages saying how I should be there with you, holding you tight, instead of being here. How mad you are that I am no longer there with you... but yet you continue to tell me that this will never work.

I moved over 500 miles away from anyone I know so you could be happy with your family. I gave you a ring, which is something I said I would never do again. You were elated and eagerly accepted my proposal... just to throw the ring back at me three months later because I'm not making enough money for us to be comfortable without your income, and you can't handle the job I do.

But yet, you continue daily to send me these messages, telling me that you miss me and love me and wish I was with you still... and then tell some friends to help me move on, and others that you're a wreck without me and can't live without me there. You tell me that even if we did get married, you would choose your family over your husband and divorce me if that's what would make your family happy...

You rip my heart right out of my chest, killing my spirit and soul along with it... then you feed me false hope by telling me these small things. I know you hate this, but live with your choice if you are going to make it. Don't treat me like I'm a toy or a yo-yo. It's not fair to me, and it's not fair to you.

It's been a little under 4 days since I last seen you. When telling me good bye, you hugged me and wanted me to hold you tight in my arms. You kissed me and told me that you will always love me, and will never be able to love someone else like you love me again. If this is true, then why is it that you have to do this? I try so hard to put a roof over your head and your left hand wore a ring... I told you my deepest, darkest secrets... you're not just my lover... you're my best friend... you're the one person that I can tell anything to, and NORMALLY not worry about getting judged for it.

I asked for chances over these last few days. I have broken down, wanting to scream your name down the hall... praying that you'll come back to me... but I didn't. I have tried to give you everything you have ever wanted while we have been together. Now I'm trying to give you what you want by leaving, and apparently that's not good enough either.

You need to make up your mind. I refuse to move from one state and back to another, and then again just for you to be happy. Unlike you, my personal happiness is more important than what my family thinks... they don't like you, that's their problem... I don't have to come around. If they accept me, then they have to accept you. It's like having my arm cut off... I can't quite reach and do what I used to be able to. I know this is hard for you too... I can actually take your feelings into consideration... but I know exactly what you are doing... you're already trying to fill the void of me leaving... and baby, no matter how hard you try... you'll never fill that void again... just like I will never be able to fill the void that is in my heart either.

I would have followed you to the end of time, not ever second guessing my choice. I stuck with you during your times of being ill, where we had to live off my salary... it was hard, but we were happy before we moved. You told me that everything you do is in hopes of making our lives better... well, do you believe me now when I say moving was an awful idea?

All it has done is cause pain and suffering. I'm sick of pain and suffering. I'm ready to be happy. I'm happy with myself, and while I'm not complete without you... I will go on. I will be strong, because I believe in myself...

Goodbye *****, maybe I'll see you in another lifetime...

Here's a little something I wanted to share... it's something that was pretty special to me, before I got over it...

We woke up without our clothes of virtue
Holding on to each other and the fleeting time
We both knew that an otherwise perfect moment
Was spoiled by shame and sudden lies

But I guess I can take the pain
God knows that I will take the blame
For all the things we had to hide
I know I can take the guilt
But I can't take her off my mind

Well, I made this bed so that's where I'll lie down
Another lonely night in a cold house
I could dream and just confess
So wake me up when things go back

I guess I can take the pain
God knows I will take the blame
For all the things we had to hide
I know I can take the guilt
But I can't take her off my mind

There's no easy way to say it
We should go our separate ways
But I can't keep holding on
I know she'll haunt me just the same
I should have never played the game
But it's time that I let go

I guess I can take the pain
God knows I will take the blame
For all the things we had to hide
I know I can take the guilt
But I can't take her off my mind

To Alice:

It happens every time
You've given me the sign
We start to get it on but then you stop me
You know I've had it up to here
You need to be more clear
Cause you're the one that led me here
So take me...

Cause you said that you would
But then you changed you mind
How could you do this to me??
It's just so unkind
And it's cruel if you say that you'll go all the way
I can't wait for the day
That you don't change your mind...

You've got to understand
Things are getting out of hand
You can't just leave me sitting here unseen to
You know I don't know what to do
Or how long to wait for you
You said you needed time so I won't rush you

I'll never let you down
I'll always be around
When you need someone
To catch you when you fall down
I'm waiting here for you
If you decide you want to
If you want me to stay
Then I'm only a phone call away

I wanted to send her this one so bad but I didn't



I feel so sad the pain that I have in my heart hurts more than any physical pain I have ever expirenced. It hurts so much because the reason she is no longer by my side is all my fault.

I would give up everythig just to wake up next to her in the mornings again.
I pray over and over again for god to give me the strength and wisdom to either let it go and accept it or teach me the way to be a better man.

She is so sweet and kind and loving. She even blessed me with a wonderful little boy. So why is she not here, because I didn't show her the love and the affection she deserved. I stopped telling her how much I loved her an how much I appreciated her. My hugs and kisses turned into foul words towards my wife.

Instead of telling her thank you I asked her to do more. She had the whole weight of the relationship on her back and I wasn't helping her carry it.

But now it's too late and I lost the only person that ever truly understood me. Will she ever see that I really understand what went wrong with us, I don't think so.

I wish I knew all the right things to say to her so that we can fall in love again and start our family over on a new leaf.

But she doesn't believe I can be the man she is looking for. She lost my trust after many broken promises I made. That's the hardest part trying to gain back the trust that I lost, and knowing again that it was all my fault.

Alejandra
Leaving me will be the biggest mistake in your life, and you will regret it for the rest of your days. You told me you couldn't give your all to me, and that a relationship isn't what you want right now. But you held your head up high after using me to pick yourself up, after I treated you so well, you pursue someone else. You move on to this other person so fast with only lust in mind, but I know this isn't the life you want. So for you to suddenly start giving your "all" to someone else and putting more effort into finding him and knowing him than working on the small problems we had to make it work, and saying you couldn't do it for me, hurts me significantly. You should be ashamed of yourself for treating me this way. I am a person with feelings and not some stepping stool for you to feel good about yourself. Shame on you!! How dare you treat me this way, after all I've done for you. I was there for you and helped you through your darkest times and this is the thanks I get. . I am suffering emotionally and physically, while you think this crazy world of not working and being with someone new is happiness. You have lost your f_cking mind and need to fix your life, and stop living in this fantasy world of being young. You are 28 with an 11 year old, start acting like a mother. A new relationship will bring weird and new feelings that will get you excited, but its just a rebound, and they usually never last. I curse the day I first saw you and fell in love. Karma will get the best of you, and you will soon feel the pain and agonizing suffering I do. I have never been ill-willed till the day you destroyed everything that was me by making selfish decisions. You are the coldest iceberg I have ever met. Cold hearted and emotionless. I wish nothing but the same pain,misery and destruction you have brought onto me and my life, and for the rest of your days and nights to be lonely.

Alejandra
Leaving me will be the biggest mistake in your life, and you will regret it for the rest of your days. You told me you couldnt give your all to me, and that a relationship isnt what you want right now. But you held your head up high after using me to pick yourself up, after i treated you so well, you pursue someone else. You move on to this other person so fast with only lust in mind, but i know this isnt the life you want. So for you to suddenly start giving your "all" to someone else and putting more effort into finding him and knowing him than working on the small problems we had to make it work, and saying you couldnt do it for me, hurts me significantly. You should be ashamed of yourself for treating me this way. I am a person with feelings and not some stepping stool for you to feel good about yourself. Shame on you!!! how dare you treat me this way, after all ive done for you. I was there for you and helped you through your darkest times and this is the thanks i get. . I am suffering emotionally and physically, while you think this crazy world of not working and being with someone new is happiness. You have lost your f_cking mind and need to fix your life, and stop living in this fantasy world of being young. You are 28 with an 11 year old, start acting like a mother. A new relationship will bring weird and new feelings that will get you excited, but its just a rebound, and they usually never last. I curse the day i first saw you and fell in love. Karma will get the best of you, and you will soon feel the pain and agonizing suffering i do. I have never been ill-willed till the day you destroyed everything that was me by making selfish decisions. You are the coldest iceberg i have ever met. Cold hearted and emotionless. I wish nothing but the same pain,misery and destruction you have brought onto me and my life, and for the rest of your days and nights to be lonely.



Sorry to disturb your venting, Now this is just my opinion, but I think that having these feeling are no good for you. How do you expect to move on when you harbour all these ill feeling towards her. It is normal to feel some hate towards our ex's for hurting us but we need to learn to let it go-FOR OURSELVES. Doing this will help you move on. Life's a B**** but it goes on and we can't always have what we want. And it might be her loss for losing you, but oh well like you said its her loss. Wishing that she has misfoutune will make you feel good for a while, but tell me how long does it last??

I've read some of your advice that you have given me and others on previous threads. Listen to what you say because it is good advice!

Iv read some of your advice that you have given me and others on previous threads. listen to what you say because it is good advice!

I know its good advice, but its difficult for me when trying to deal with my own situation. It is easier for me to sit here and listen to someone else's problems and give them advice then it is to make myself believe my own. In short it is easier said to someone else than done for myself.

I have a lot of hatred for her because she lied a lot to get me to let her go easier. I would have thought she had enough respect to tell me the honest truth instead of stringing me along and feeding me bullsh_t lies for a month. And I really thought that because when we were together she was always honest, and all of a sudden she's this completely different person. She gave me every excuse in the book. I want to be alone. I don't want to be in a relationship. I want to focus on me and my son. I want to focus on getting a job and I can't give you the attention you need. I want to sort out my feelings and my life. And I did nothing wrong in this relationship. She made a poor choice to break up with me because she was depressed about losing her job. She said she wanted to be alone and not in a relationship, yet here she is now aggressively pursuing someone 6 years younger than her age, and she criticized me for being 2 years younger than her. Instead of trying to work on the feelings we had, she purposely fought them off and went off to find fresh new ones. Of course these feeling are no good for me, but that's the fact of feelings they are emotions that emerge, not artificially created so to speak. Like we can't say... hmmmm I want to feel happy... or I'm going to make myself angry. I was probably more invested in it than she was, (which is partly my fault, but I feel so hard for her and blinded by the love and beauty she fed me) but she manipulated me into thinking she was the person I wanted to be with. And then to turn around and say "ok im finished", just wasn't fair to me. Its like a friend running beside you and telling you to keep running and training with them, and all of a sudden you realize you're friend gave up a half a mile ago. If I had a switch to turn these feelings off and move on I would have done it the day she said "this isnt working". I would have flipped the switch and walked right out the door. I harbor strong feelings. Its my nature. If I could erase her from my mind and everything from her I would. Because now I feel this outcome really wasn't worth the happy times we had as great as they were. This bad outcome is defintely outweighing all those good times. And its killing me. I would rather have never met her than to go through what I am experiencing right now.

I was in the same situation as you was. He fed me all the lines, he said he card, loved me and wanted me, we even talked about marriage. It was even worse because marriage is big in my religion. When he left me he gave me every excuse, he couldn't handle a relationship, he was in trouble and he didn't want to drag me down, he wanted to be alone. And now? The last words I saw from him was him declaring his love for someone else. I know how it feels to have that one person we love hurt you. I couldn't handle the pain either, I have never experienced anything like it in my life. But it is getting better.

People change, maybe she was honest when she was with you, but she is a different person now, and so are you, but unfortunaly you're the one who is suffering whilst she is doing her own thing. Don't give her the satisfaction of dragging you down. Make yourself bigger and better. Overcome her bulls****.

I think your at the stage of anger, lucky for me mine didn't last that long. I can see you like going to the gym, well use your anger in there. These feeling will pass and soon. Chalk it up as an experience, just make sure you learn from it.

A.

Well, where do I start. From the moment I saw who I knew our future was bright. The way you came into my life was incredible. High school sweethearts and first loves, what else could you ask for. The past 5 years have been the best of my life, and you have helped me become who I am today. I became close with your parents and family. The amazing memories we shared will never be forgotten and you will always have a piece of my heart. After 5 years you have decided that you are in a routine and wanting to see what else is out there, yes this happens because we only know each other. For me, you would have been the world and the only one for me. What hurts me most is that after we broke up, you sat me down and told me how much you loved me, grabbed my hands and we stared into each others eyes. Hearts pounding and the feeling of soul mates where we don't have to say a thing to understand each other. You began to cry and I told you that everything would be okay. We then said our parting lines and held each other one more time. What I don't understand is how you met someone so fast and invited him into your whole life. Yes I called you and told you I was upset and I might have said some things I should'nt have, but the way you handled it was unacceptable, especially since this was on valentines day. The way you made me out to be in order to make the new person look good was uncalled for. I would not wish this pain upon anyone. I did everything for you and I guess this was too much. Two months later I think about you every day. I wish that one day we will find each other again. Yes I am angry, yes I am hurt, but as long as you are happy, I will accept the outcome. You mean the world to me and I will always love you. I know in my heart you know we are to be together, yet feel as though you need to be sure for yourself. I will not wait around because of the pain, but I will be open to life and everything it has to offer. Even after everything and how everyone tries to tell me that there is something better out there for me, I love you forever and a day. Good things happen to good people. So long

Alejandra, my life feels empty without you. I wish you'd realise that I was the best for you. I miss you a lot and wish you would wake up from this dream you live in, you think is happiness.

Hey Alice, wutcha doing? Do you even remember who I am and everything we've been through. The times we fought hard for our relationship. Even when we thought it was over things always gotten better. I never knew you were the type that would quit. What happened? Does this new guy really mean that much to you? He just popped out of no where and destroyed our relationship.

Well its been a while now, I'm kind of used to you not being around anymore yet I still love you and miss you. I also know I deserve to be treated better than this. The mean things you 've told me do you really mean it? Is this guy really better than me? Are you really too good for me? Why do you always listen to your friends? Just because they told you they would be disappointed in you if you picked me?

I want you back, and I want things to change but I know it can't so what now? You tell me? Should I really move on with my life without you in it? I want you in it. We were each other's first everything and I want us to be each other's last everything. What about all the promises we made to each other. I guess it never really meant anything to you.

If you can hear me out there, I love you and I want you to be happy even if its not with me but I won't want to live my life without you. If only if we could have our happy ending. Ill be waiting for you to contact me if you love me which I know you do. I can still feel you do because I know we had much more than this. I just hope things get better for us soon no matter what life takes us.

Hey B----,

How are you doing.SO what happened, you could not call me on birthday in January? Even though I called you on yours.How long would it have taken to pick you the phone and say hi and happy birtday. After 8 year.Come on really.I heard you called our ex roommate.I know you liked him and told me I needed to be more like me.Well you know what, I am me ,I don't want to be like him.
Tell me this the last time we broke up why did you keep me as a back up.Did I really deserve it? I was there for you when you were scared at 4 in the morning and you would call me I would talk to you for hours until you would go back to sleep.I would get up in the middle of the night to get you your medicine when you were sick.I did all I could Be--- and you know what.I am moving on.That's it .I hope some body does to you what you did to me.

Thanks for doing me a favor by breaking up with me, I'm having the time of my life. Oh and my last words to you?. Eat sh_t! Who is laughing now!?