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View Full Version : He holds this over my head, his family hates me


Treeny
Nov 5, 2007, 04:59 PM
OK I'm 18 and the guy I am in a relationship keeps holding something over my head.
Here it goes when we were not going out officially yet but seeing each other he invited me to a party, the whole time he was ignoring me, so I started talking to other guys and ended up
In my car with another guy, we were talking and we did kiss well he found me and then a big fight between him and the guy and a few other guys that were friends all jumped him. I felt horrible and I tried to help him. He told his family that I had him jumped!
I know it was partly my fault but he has made his family hate me and he keeps saying that I wanted the fight to happen and that I provoked it.
He also says thjat I wanted it to happen because he heard me say to the same guy earlier my bofriend is going to beat you up. I may have said that but I trufully did not intend for all that to happen. I don't know why I said it maybe to see what his reaction would be I don't know.
But is it right for him to say I had him jumped? And now he wants me to apologize to his sister who hates me and wants to beat me up.
I saw her once after all of this and she came after me . I wrote her a note saying I did not mean for all that to happen and that is still not good enough.
He wants me to go to his house and stay hidden and be quiet until after I am forgiven.
I don't even want to go to his house and I don't feel I should have to justify myself to his family, I think that he needs to deal with then and forgive me about the whole ordeal and stop holding it over my head.
Please give me honest opinions, of what you think I may show him the feed back maybe unbiased opinions will help. Sorry sloppy was wrighting so fast.

ksholde
Nov 5, 2007, 06:15 PM
I Am Going Through Something Similar. My Boyfriend's Family Despises The Ground I Walk On. I Have Tried To Make It Better, But I Have Come To Realize That I'm Not Dating His Family I Am Dating Him. It Does Make It A lot Harder On Us Especially The Closer It Gets To Holidays. You Need To Admit Any Wrong Doing And He Needs To Try To Mend Broken Fences, But Remember His Family Doesn't Have To Like You, But You Need To Try To Understand Where His Family Is Coming From. If That Happened To My Brother I Would Be Upset.

Ash123
Nov 5, 2007, 06:20 PM
I have to say that you all should be friends for a year.

After that incident, being lovers will be tough right now.

Tell him you made ahuge mistake and if he wants to break up with you - you understand.
Apologize to his sister and say you hope you all can at least be friends one day.

Treeny
Nov 5, 2007, 07:21 PM
OK thanks guys, but do you think its right for him to keep saying I had him jumped? He acts like I intentonally had this happen.

shygrneyzs
Nov 5, 2007, 07:31 PM
He is wrong saying you had him intentionally jumped. He was jumped because of his behavior. You said you two were not dating - so why the big show from him when you were with someone else? Control! This guy also wants you to go to HIS house and hide out? NO WAY. Control freak!

You are only 18 and way too young to have all this psycho drama in your life. I would say to break off any ties with him and go your own way. His behavior can only get worse if you stay around him and have anything to do with him. He controls you now, what do you think will happen in a year or even 6 months?

Now if you told this other guy that your boyfriend would beat him up - and he heard about this - how silly that is of you. Silly but forgiveable. He did not have to bring in his whole family on this either. Drop him and his sister and anyone else in that family. Get your own life and stay safe. If he bothers you, report him for stalking or harassing or threatening you.

Good luck.