My 5 yr old son was paddled by the principal I have several problems about this and would like any help or suggestions.
1.) I signed the form to allow him to be paddled but I wrote in very noticeable informing them that before he was to be paddled they must first call and tell me what he is being paddled for. I live 2 miles from the school.

2.) my son received a paddling by the principal which left a very red and raised mark on him 5 hours later. I do have pictures. The principal paddled him at nap time (after lunch). He got around to calling me to inform me he was paddled at 4:00 pm.

3.) he was paddled on Tuesday by the teacher for hitting a child and used the restroom on the wall. I went talked to the teacher on Wednesday and also sent a note telling her he was not to be paddled again. I made it very clear I expected to be called before hand.

4.) the principal had the teacher walk him over to the office on Friday and he was paddled again. This is when he left the marks. This is the best part the teacher never told him she already paddled him nor did she stop it. So the principal left marks on my 5 yr old child by accident. It took him 3 days to get around to handling it and he was 4 hours late on calling to get permission since they were told not to at all.

What should I do and how should I handle this?

You call an attorney. Explain all this. While you signed an authorization granting the paddling, you did not agree to excessive paddling and you say you also had stated you were to be notified before punishment was administered. Get a lawyer on this ASAP!

Take your child out of that school if you can, at the very least, rescind your authorization for the paddling.

Note: Did you take pictures of the marks? Did you take your son to a doctor? Use anything like that to bolster your argument and to provid evidence.

Your first step should be getting an attorney ASAP. Have you contacted the Superintendent? That should be your second step.

Thank you for your response. I have talked with the superintendent and the school board had a meeting tonight. I went to the meeting but with it being such last minute the board said it would be best to let them add me to the agenda for the next meeting. I agreed to do that. I figured that would give me time to find an attorney. I did send a note and told the teacher and principal that my son was not to be disciplined by anyone they could call me and I would handle the problem or bring him home. I did get a copy of the corporal punishment letter that I signed with my specific instructions. So that proves they are at fault and yes I did get pictures and emailed them to the superintendent.

Sounds like you have a good handle on the what is going on. Hope this all turns out well for your son and you. Are you going to look for a different school?

I live in a rural area there is not another school that he can go to unless I move to another school district. I'm going after the teacher and the principal changing schools. My son is doing great in his new classroom across the hall from the old teacher. Also the teacher helper is an old girlfriend and she baby sat my 15 yr old son. I feel a lot better knowing that she will look out for him.

Hopefully all will turn out well for your son. You are a good parent - some would have let it all slide.

Not to be insensitive, but why would you give anyone permission to paddle your child in the first place?
You may have said this already, but have you revoked your permission to do this in writing and made sure it was attached to the permission letter?

I agree with everyone's posts to contact an attorney.

Not to be insensitive, but why would you give anyone permission to paddle your child in the first place?

Some schools do this. Especially here in the South. It is routine unless you sign a waiver stating that you don't want it done. Personally I think it is barbaric, so I have always signed for my children NOT to get paddled.

I just could not give anyone permission to lay there hands or paddles on my child. For situations just like this.
The teacher knew the kid had been punished but left that part out with the principal - so he got it again. Did the teacher get some sick enjoyment out of the kids pain?

My entire family is in Georgia - and I have never heard of this. I was paddled as a child, but I didn't think any school could legally do that anymore.

Oh my gosh, he is 5! Why is there the need to "paddle" a 5 year old, if I ever smack my children (which is very rare, as I can make them understand things by talking to them) I do it with my hand... what is a paddle (I'm assuming its like a stick)? I feel so sad that your son has had to go through this, I would be enraged if someone ever touched my kids... how do people cope down south?? I'm sure this is classed as child abuse...

A child needs to be paddled at times, and parents who act like this do the worst thing they can for the child, let the teaches and principal paddle a child who needs it, and stop trying to raise a child from the new age books on kids.

A child needs to be paddled at times, and parents who act like this do the worst thing they can for the child, let the teaches and principal paddle a child who needs it, and stop trying to raise a child from the new age books on kids.Actually I'll raise my children as I see fit whether it includes 'paddling' or not. In my case it's not.

Normally it is societies issues, since from what I have seen those with liberal parents who do not paddle in a larger percent have worst manners and lack more self control. But how you deal with your children at home is your business, how the school deals with them should be the schools, and parents need to butt out and let the schools back to doing their jobs.

Are you joking me? I smack my children when needs be, I didn't learn that from a bloody book! Its common sense... And beating a 5 year old is doing what exactly?? Teaching him that hitting is wrong?? Take a moment before answering...

I am sorry, but it is not the schools job to hit my child. If they, as educators, those who have the "calling" to reach children - can't find a better way to discipline other than to hit a child, then they should find a new profession.

Their job is to teach - not hit.

Permission or not, a paddling should never get to the point that it leaves red marks. Especially ones that you could take pics of HOURS later. Child Protective Services take kids off parents for way less than that!

Actually I'll raise my children as I see fit whether it includes 'paddling' or not. In my case it's not.

Got to spread the love NK, while a pop on the tush from mom or dad may be appropriate if the situation deems (running out into traffic for example), paddling should not be done In my opinion.

Paddling is demeaning, degrading, and totally outrageous. I would never let another adult touch my children!!


from what I have seen those with liberal parents who do not paddle in a larger percent have worst manners and lack more self control. But how you deal with your children at home is your business, how the school deals with them should be the schools, and parents need to butt out and let the schools back to doing thier jobs.

Whoa, now I'm about in an uproar!! Man, I'm hot!!

I have raised 4 beautiful wonderful children and only 1 has ever been spanked, and only once. I take that back, 2 kids have, and only once each. My youngest one last year for SEVERELY acting up in school (popped on the booty by me). I now regret what I did. Every time he gets in trouble at school he gets tearful and asks "Mom, are you gonna spank me?" I will NEVER do it again, although the situation warranted action.

My 4 children are the most loving and respectful children you would ever meet. They have good manners and a TON of self-control.

Hitting does not equate good behavior. Intimidation does not teach good behavior. Good parenting equates good behavior.

The parents should butt out and let the schools do their jobs? He! No!! It is up to us as parents to know what goes on at school. It is us as parents to teach our children manners so that they behave at school, and when they don't it is our responsibility as parents to deal with the situation in an appropriate manner.

I know, as a parent, I visit my children's schools daily. Yes, I said daily. Yeah, I am the exception to the rule... but I don't paddle, spank, or hit my children. I am an active role model in their lives. I give respect and I get respect.

Wow, my blood pressure is high now!

First off, I can't understand why you would have said school officials could touch your child in the first place. School officials should not, under any circumstances, be hitting students no matter what the method. Restraining students, if they are armed for instance, is one thing, but not hitting. Yes, let the school discipline students while they are on campus, with parent notification and consent if necessary (i.e. suspension would not require consent (I don't think... )).

Secondly, with the general spanking issue... my parents were among those that thought it was okay to spank a child. My father never used anything other that his hand, my mother sometimes used a wooden spoon, I don't think it was ever bare bottom. I, however, do not believe it is okay to spank a child. Maybe it is because I experienced it but I see it as a form of child abuse. My parents did it right up until I was 17 (if you haven't seen me post in other threads, I'm now 23) and only stopped because the school psychologist stepped in and told my father he shouldn't be spanking a 17 year old after I vented to a teacher. Yes, I know the child at issue here is only 5 but if it is allowed to happen at all, who knows when it will stop.

Corporal punishment in schools was also outlawed many years ago. I don't know if this is just in New York, where I'm from, or just in public schools.

To wrap up, children should never be hit as punishment and remember that a child that was abused is more likely to abuse as an adult so it needs to stop now.

This is probably a Christian (independent Baptist?) school in the Bible Belt. If one of their discipline measures is paddling and if a parent signs a consent form, paddling is what happens if a teacher or school authority decides the child needs it.

Corporal punishment in schools was also outlawed many years ago. I don't know if this is just in New York, where I'm from, or just in public schools.

This must be in New York, and the northern states. I grew up in Michigan and Ohio and it was not allowed. But now that I am in Tennessee, it is common practice here. I actually have to sign a paper at the beginning of each school year if I DON'T want my children paddled.

You see, I teeter and I totter about spanking. I believe there is a need for it if the circumstance calls for it, i.e. a dangerous situation (running out in traffic, playing with matches or a lighter), but not for basic general discipline. There are better ways to discipline a child, under normal circumstances, than spanking.

While I think it wrong for anyone other than a parent to discipline a child in this way (meaning anything other than verbally telling a child "no") I do not see an issue with spanking in general. Spanking is spanking , plain and simple. You don't do it to harm the child but to teach them. I was spanked and I am a good law abiding positive citizen. There IS a difference between child abuse and spanking. Spanking ddoes not require whelps, bruises, or smacking across a room.. I will pop my son on the thigh or hand if he disobeys me after an initial warning. Now is not the time for me to be my son's friend, it is the time for me to lead him in a good direction and teach him right from wrong. While Im not a person to tell another person that they are not being a good parent, I do have issues with people who do no type of discipline. Every child is different, no parent can tell another parent that they are dealing with their child incorrectly. I know my child, and I know that some of the current methods of discipline would never work appropriately on my son. I continuously get comments on the good behaviour of my child. I rarely need to spank him, and I think this is because it has happened in the past and helped him to see that I don't mess around when I tell him no to something. I don't play games and he knows that... You can call me a bad parent for this if you wish, but compared to some other children and young adults I have seen in the world who were raised in the current methods, I think my way is better... but I will never push that way on anyone else, and would expect the same from others.

As for the OP, I think you seem to be on the right track. I would be absolutely irrate with this school and the principal regardless of the paper I signed. There is a line that was crossed here. Good luck to you and your family.

A child needs to be paddled at times, and parents who act like this do the worst thing they can for the child, let the teaches and principal paddle a child who needs it, and stop trying to raise a child from the new age books on kids.Have you actually raised children? I mean actively?

Yep 5 of them, always had a rule if they got paddled in school they got another one when they got home. Four of them are in their 30's and all in the plumbing business. In the south and rual areas a good spanking is the best think you can do for a child when they are very bad. It is actually child abuse not to, since you are not teaching a child right from wrong very well, esp with children going wild like they do now adays.

Schools should all go back to it, lucky the schools here still do.

With all the whack jobs out there - you would trust a virtual stranger to have the "power" to hit your kid? Why would you say it is okay for someone you barely know to hit your child? I just can't get past that. I was spanked in kindergarten (in Georgia, I was 5) for stepping in a mud puddle. Was that appropriate? Or did I just piss of the teacher?

Like I have said before, I am from the south, my entire family lives down there currently - your views are not shared by most southerners that I know.
My sister, who has to girls, would have someone's head on a platter if they paddled her kids at school. My brothers, with their kids would be the same way.

I will discipline my kids, thank you.

Boy, I'm glad we live where we do. My kids are great. They listen to us and when they don't they get time out and such. They feel bad when they overstep their boundaries and get punished because they enjoy our love and happiness and want that. They aren't cowering in fear which seems to be the american way in the household and the governing political way. (How does a Catholic minister have 5 kids?? )

Okay, NK, I don't know if it is an "american" thing.

I choose other forms of punishment with my daughter. (that is not to say she has never been spanked) She is respectful, knows and uses her manners. There is the OLD saying "spare the rod, spoil the child". I don't think that is true.

My kid does not live in fear of me or my husband. I would not want her or anyone to live that way.
I believe that, at school, discipline should not be physical. My daughters teachers KNOW what we expect out of her and they KNOW that if there is a problem, they can come to us and talk openly with out us getting all defensive. It is truly a partnership.
They don't have to paddle to get a point across.

Hello:

Children shouldn't be hit any more than adults should...

excon

PS> On second thought, I can think of a LOT of adults that need smackin...

Fr. I was raised in the dear old south and our teachers beat the hell out of us... maybe sometimes I deserved it. The one that hurt my feelings the most was when I was in first grade. When I was in eight grade I saw a teacher jerk a boy up out of his seat and smack the hell out of him with a leather strap... he cared less where he hit him just as long as he hit him. I have 3 kids in school that have never been touched by a teacher and had better never be touched by one or their mother would be in jail... I think the teachers in my children's school know this. I know for a fact that a lot of teachers abuse their power.

Do you live in a state where corporal punishment in schools is legal and/or does your child attend a private school? I can't quite understand your post regarding how many times your child was paddled and why. You mention something about your child hitting another student. I will say this, that bullying behavior in schools is not taken lightly these days and will be dealt with quite harshly under any circumstances. I do agree that you should have been notified first, especially since you stipulated that directive. At this point I'd rescind the agreement you signed and, as an alternative, stipulate that you are to be notified whenever your child misbehaves. If you are able to go to the school on a moment's notice, then do so whenever you're called. If not, then you need to stipulate some other type of disciplinary consequence to be imposed, such as a timeout period and loss of privilege (such as staying in at recess.) While I agree that a child should never be punished to the point of injury, I also believe that the parents have a responsibility to work with the school in matters of discipline and this is one instance where the parents and the school need to get together.

I'm shocked! I thought the OP was in some ELDC* not the USA! You learn something new every day. In the UK parents aren't allowed to smack children (although I think this is the nanny state going too far) and corporal punishment in schools was resigned to the seventies.

I remember getting told off at school for things that weren't my fault/ the teacher was having a bad day. I cringe to think what could have happened if they were allowed to hit me!

If I had children I wouldn't let anyone hit them. I wouldn't let anyone else hit my dog!

*Economically Less Developed Country

Normally it is societies issues, since from what I have seen those with liberal parents who do not paddle in a larger percent have worst manners and lack more self control. But how you deal with your children at home is your business, how the school deals with them should be the schools, and parents need to butt out and let the schools back to doing thier jobs.
A big part of the problem is that the parents don't do their jobs, so the schools are forced to do it for them. Worse yet, a lot of parents believe that the schools are solely responsible for disciplining and educating the children. Nothing could be farther from the truth. The fact is, both institutions, family and school, share the responsibility for educating children. There needs to be cooperation, not competition, between the two. A lot of parents don't want the schools butting into what they consider to be their business, where disciplining of the children is considered, but then they don't take it upon themselves to do it either. As a result, the child is unable to function effectively in school and disrupts his/her own education as well as that of his classmates. Now I'm not suggesting that the OP is guilty of this but a lot of people in our society don't understand that. The prevailing attitudes within our modern culture have served to sabotage our schools and render them largely ineffective. Instead of turning out upstanding, productive citizens with a sense of responsibility we're instead producing a generation of self-centered people with an entitlement attitude and absolutely no personal responsibility whatsoever. Admittedly, there's a lot more to it than the issue of whether students should be paddled in schools. But there is a danger in rationalizing everything and not wanting to hold young people accountable for their actions.

There are kids in our school that you can see that parents have lost control. And you think to yourself that proper discipline would handle that.
It always amazes me that parents don't get involved. I don't get it. I am completely opposite. I am almost sure that my daughter's teacher is sick of getting notes from me. I let her know when my daughter woke up on the wrong side of the bed just so she knows what she is dealing with.
We participate in every way we can.
So it baffles me when parents don't get involved.

But... I still would NEVER allow her teacher to get a paddle out. As much as I trust her, physically punishing her is not an option.

In the south and rual areas a good spanking is the best think you can do for a child when they are very bad. It is actually child abuse not to,

Wait a minute Chuck, I live in rural Tennessee too, so don't tell me that it is child abuse NOT to spank your child. Show me where in the Department of Child and Family Services it states that it is child abuse not to spank your child. This is utter nonsense.

Spanking is not the best thing you can do when they are bad. Again, it depends on the age. As I stated earlier, when they are very young a little pop on the tushie or a little pop on the hand is okay, but when they are of an age to understand right from wrong, spanking is degrading. There are so many other forms of discipline that can be used that don't harm a child's psyche.

Just as beauty is in the eye of the beholder, I guess discipline is in the hands of the one wielding the power. You can beat your child if you want, I will raise mine with respect.

I agree with many others here; the school should not be touching anyone's child. Parents should only spank under dire circumstances, and as J_9 said, only up to a certain age where reason can take over. I've seen kids who are afraid of their parents - it's false respect, and it's not pretty.

Interestingly, from the other side of things, I had a professor who's son was a senior in high school on 9/11. The school went into "lock down" and they wouldn't allow students to call their parents or go home. My professor's son stood up and walked out of class because he knew his parents would want him HOME. A teacher stepped in his way and put her hand on his chest, telling him to stop. He took her hand, removed it from his chest and said, "My parents would want me at home. I'm going home." and he walked past her. He was suspended for five days for assaulting the teacher.

Double standard? I think so.

I, of all people, am at a loss for words. I ride both sides.

As a child... when it was time for a bath my mom would tell me to strip and lean over the tub (I had always done something). But normally she was right, I had and knew it. I was a conniving little b***h :) Lets see, she used belts; brushes; wooden spoons... whatever was convenient and least likely to break in her hands. She didn't beat me, but I got a good whoopin.
In kindergarten, I started getting paddlings. Started with a ruler to the hand and by eighth grade was getting "Big Bertha" to my a** for the whole school to hear me scream.
Now that I have a son (2.5yo with my temper and attitude) I don't know what to do. I try time out... he takes his time out chair and throws it across the room. You put him in his room, he literally almost breaks the door (yes they are hallow). So what does that leave? A good ole whoopin. I mean, I have never left a mark on him... but I feel like I have to put him in check every once in a while.
However, I would absolutely hurt someone if they ever put their hands on my baby. Heck, I get mad if my mom pops him on the heinie!

Anyhow, Cherie, sounds like you're doing good.

This is probably a Christian (independent Baptist?) school in the Bible Belt.

All schools down here paddle. Public and private. In most cases it is not the teacher that paddles, but the principal or vice principal. There must be a witness also, be it the teacher or another member of the staff, but there IS supposed to be a witness.

Again, I am the disciplinarian in my home, I am the one who teaches respect and deals with disrespect appropriately, and that does NOT mean spanking.

While we all raise our children in our own fashion, I personally do not believe in corporal punishment because I have seen it work opposite than the expected outcome.

I had an incident 2 years ago when my daughter, then 12 and in 6th grade, began her homework in math class a moment before the teacher told them to start. When I picked my daughter up that afternoon I learned that, because she did one problem of her homework prior to hearing the start bell, she was stood up with her nose in the corner for the remaining 35 minutes of class. I was OUTRAGED!! I turned that car around and went right into the principal's office and met with him. After interviewing the teacher and the other students, it seemed that this was a popular punishment for her. Suffice it to say she is no longer teaching at that school. ;)

J_9, I grew up in NC back when Noah was still floating around in the ark, and remember paddling and ruler smacking etc. in public schools, but didn't realize paddling is still being done there.

Is this an accepted thing? I'm surprised parents haven't risen up in protest!

Is this an accepted thing? I'm surprised parents haven't risen up in protest!

Yup it is still very accepted and actually EXPECTED by some parents. I, however, am not one of them. Maybe it is because I was raised in the North where it was not accepted. Some of my neighbors and friends think I am absolutely looney toons for not allowing my children to be paddled. The school's primary responsibility In my opinion is education not discipline. My responsibility is discipline.

I was raised in the South and proud of that - but I would in no way allow anyone to put their hands/paddles on my child.
My sister and brothers all have kids and live in the South, I think they share my feelings.

There are many of us like this now NW, but there are still many, including my neighbors all around me, who are still of the old mindset that the school should do the paddling. It's just an old school school of thought.

I would never want the school to paddle my children. But I would expect something to be done if they hit another child and urinated on a wall in the school. Maybe you should look into why your child feels it's OK to go to the bathroom on the wall. Forget the attorneys... just straighten your son out and send him back to school. For whatever reason you did sign the form saying you approved the paddling. So there really shouldn't be a problem.

Thank you to everyone for your response. I've contacted several attorneys and can not find one due to they are scared of being black balled and said the same would happen to me. I think the teacher does has a personal problem with me from 4 yrs ago. Truthfully it was not even to do with me but I went to the scene of a wreck for support to my best friend. Her son was the driver which he was 17 at the time but the teacher pulled out in front of him, he topped the hill and hit her infant son was in the front seat of the car in a carrier but not strapped in the carrier and the seatbelt wasn't strapped either. The baby was ejected and did not make it, due to this woman's neglect. I was concerned from the get go about him being in her class. I figured she probably would not put it together. I don't even remember seeing her at the scene.
Everybody acts like I'm making to big of a deal. This is my baby it is a big deal. I'm so mad I can't hardly stand it. I don't know what else to do. School board is trying to kind of brush me off and telling me to just let it be and they would be no more problems.
If anyone knows of anyone that might could help please let me know, I have pictures and the consent form that I signed that clearly states to call first each incident. I also went talked to the teacher the day after he was paddled and sent a little note stating he is not to be paddled at all. I think she did it for meanness. I don't want money I want her and the principals job. They don't deserve to be in charge of themselves much less children.

Then call your states captiol, there should be someone in charge of education there. Better yet make copies of all you have and send them. Tell them if the issue is not resolved that you will get a lawyer. You may have to get one, try the next town over or the next county. Don't let this slide.

That happened with me with Child Protective services I had pages of things against them and as soon as I mentioned CPS to any lawyers they quickly showed me the door.

There should be something you can do. Hope you figure it out. Could you take it to somewhere in your state capital?
Like I said if you had whipped him half as bad the school would have been mandated to turn it into CPS and you would have lost your son. Yet they do that and "IT is NO big deal"

I've got a 10 year old son, and if anyone ever paddled him, they better be prepared to get a whippin of their own! I know different people have different philosophies on that, but I don't believe in it. I have never had to do it for my son although I did threaten him with it once when he was biting other kids and was old enough (5 I think) to know better. I talked to him and told him what I would do if he bit another kid, and how that was hurting other kids so if he did it again I would have to punish him with a spanking... I then had to explain to him what a spanking was because he had never had one. I told him I didn't want to do it but that I also did not want him hurting other kids. Thankfully, he never did it again!

I was paddled and whipped with switches, belts, hands, flyswatters, yardsticks, and a number of other things as a child, and remember thinking even as I was being whipped, that it would never be done to my child!

I'm not being critical of your choice to paddle, but only hope you'll consider other means of punishment and "instructional correcting" for your child. All I ever learned from getting hit is that people could hurt you if they got mad... It's a wonder I didn't add to that by thinking that it was OK to hurt people when you were mad at them for something.

DOES your child have a behavior problem or learning disability? If so and that is getting him into trouble at school perhaps he needs an assistant at school to help him remember the proper way to act... only asking not judging him... maybe he was just showing off or something when he went on the wall?

I also agree that since you did initially sign the paper giving permission for the spanking, then perhaps there was some confusion in the paper work getting to the principal. Your son is out of her room now so that should no longer be an issue, but if you want to continue with a lawyer and such you may have to go outside of your area to find one willing to get involved. You could call the police and all that stuff, but since you have to live in the community, it may lead to more trouble down the road.

Have you thought about volunteering at the school and getting involved with things and people there personally? So that you are not viewed as an outsider of sorts but rather a liaison with them to work on issues?? Make yourself valuable to them rather than a problem to be dealt with?

Also, how do other parents feel about the principal and the paddling at the school? Do any of them have the same issues as you? If so, it might be easier to get the board to listen to a group of concerned parents...

From the reading I've been doing about paddling in schools, it seems the teachers and administrators have special protection under the law, which is why they can't be brought up on child abuse charges. I would write a formal letter once more to the school; give one to the admin office (principal and vice-principal), the guidance counselor, and all instructors who interact with your son stating that under NO circumstances is he to EVER be paddled. Make sure the letter is dated and signed by you and if you can get a witness to go to the school with you to see the letter being handed out, that's even better (that way they can never claim to have not received it). Then I would look into moving your son into another class with a new teacher.

As far as lawyers not wanting your case, keep trying and move up the ranks. Send a letter and the pictures, as well as other documentation to the school board. Send it to your county representatives, district representatives, hell, even your state representatives. Talk to other parents and see if anyone else has issues with the situation as it happened to your son and if they have encountered such things as well. Go to school board meetings and speak out. If getting the teacher and principal fired or at least reprimanded is important to you, don't stop until it happens.

Good luck to you,

I would amend the form that you sent in that allowed him to be paddled. Send in a new note that is notorized that states you DO NOT want your child paddled. As a teacher in NY State I find this whole issue barbaric and inhumane. Why any school would want to paddle a child or why a parent would want a teacher to discipline their child in that manner is unknown to me.

I would say they want to paddle a child to correct their behavior, to keep disipline in the class room and to raise a child in a good manner.

I can't believe parents who want their child running wild and not proerly disciplined.

I would say they want to paddle a child to correct thier behavior, to keep disipline in the class room and to raise a child in a good manner.

I can't beleive parents who want thier child running wild and not proerly disiplined.


I agree with you on one thing Fr. That parents don't want their child running wild. But, I can tell you that I was NEVER hit as a child and I did not run wild. My parents taught me to have a healthy respect of those older then me without the use of force.

As a teacher I would not feel comfortable hitting another person's child. Spanking will forever be a debated issue, those that believe in it, and those that don't. I believe that spanking has no place in the classroom.

I would say they want to paddle a child to correct thier behavior, to keep disipline in the class room and to raise a child in a good manner.

I can't beleive parents who want thier child running wild and not proerly disiplined.Where is this place where you live that the children are running around wild in the classroom? It's up to the parents to discipline and raise children properly, it's up to the teachers to teach.

Need- I need to spread the love, but I agree. And as a teacher thank you. Our job is hard enough. And boy if I hit a child I think I would feel guilty.

As a side note, I teach at a school for children with emotional, behavioral and learning difficulties and we have never hit one of our students. However, our students do not run wild. They have a respect for the teachers, the environment, and administration. We teach them to resolve issues without force.

Hello again:

Some day we may rid ourselves of the fantasy that hitting children produces healthy adults.

Of course, we live in a society where ADULTS who hit each other (and go to war on one another) ARE considered healthy. So, our training appears to be working...

Oh well, one can hope.

excon

I would say they want to paddle a child to correct thier behavior, to keep disipline in the class room and to raise a child in a good manner.

I can't beleive parents who want thier child running wild and not proerly disiplined.

That's making the assumption the only way to discipline a child is by hitting them. It's also making the assumption parents who do not strike their child allow them and want them to run wild.

I'll give you this - there are parents who are "free style" who allow their kids to bounce off the walls, disrespect everyone they choose and never correct their behavior. Those parents are doing their child a disservice. But there are also parents who only have control of their child because their child is terrified of them. I've seen kids like that, it's very, very sad. Those parents are doing their child a disservice as well.

But this isn't about how a parent disciplines - it's how the school disciplines. The school's job is to teach, not to beat. There are plenty of other punishments that schools can give which don't involve laying a finger on the child.

If it was your child you would feel different. How simple minded could someone be? Your child is your responsibility 24/7 even at school, friends, family or home. Were you abused as a kid or do you abuse your kids?

I feel the same way. At times I will spank my son but with hand or a fly swatter. My son is very well mannered, polite, and pretty good about minding. He has been in preschool for 2 yrs and even that teacher was shocked.

I never really thought he would be spanked. He was paddled for hitting another child and urinating on the bathroom wall. I feel that both of these things he probably wasn't the only child doing it. Not that I think its OK, I feel it wasn't just him

CHERIE_LABAT : I've never been wild about the paddling in school, but I also don't think its fair if 4 kids get in trouble for the exact thing and 3 are paddled and 1 is not, that makes things unfair and would be controversy over that.

I agree BUT what I see is bully picks on kid and has kid in tears. Kid tries to defend himself and both get punished. I think that is victimizing the victim twice and the schools do it because they can't be bothered sorting 'who done what' out.

To answer a few of the questions, my son has been in preschool for 2 yrs before starting kindergarten. He doesn't have any learning disabilities, in fact he scored way above level. The only problem he's ever had in preschool was that he likes to talk your head off and he would load up his shoes with rocks to bring home. Were not quiet sure why he liked the rocks, but he knew the teachers would check his pockets for the rocks so that's why he put them in his shoes. Every day when I picked him up he would dump his shoes as soon as he got in the car. He was never paddled then, and he was in a Baptist Church preschool. Since then he has been put in a different class where he is doing excellent, and even received a brag letter one day for being so good and helpful and cleaning up some trash while he was out at recess. He is my baby so he is spoiled, but he is very well mannered, respectful and polite. He goes to church regular and he does know what is acceptable and what's not. I just feel that the problem was just with this teacher. Several other school employees has said the same and all just tell me how smart, sweet and well mannered he is and how much they enjoy him.

Did he ever explain why he hit this other kid? Was he provoked? And did he explain why he went to the bathroom on the wall?
From what you are saying that must have seemed so out of character for him.

my 5 yr old son was paddled by the principal I have several problems about this and would like any help or suggestions.
1.) I signed the form to allow him to be paddled but i wrote in very noticeable informing them that before he was to be paddled they must first call and tell me what he is being paddled for. I live 2 miles from the school.

2.) my son received a paddling by the principal which left a very red and raised mark on him 5 hours later. I do have pictures. the principal paddled him at nap time (after lunch). He got around to calling me to inform me he was paddled at 4:00 pm.

3.) he was paddled on tuesday by the teacher for hitting a child and used the restroom on the wall. i went talked to the teacher on wednesday and also sent a note telling her he was not to be paddled again. i made it very clear I expected to be called before hand.

4.) the principal had the teacher walk him over to the office on friday and he was paddled again. this is when he left the marks. this is the best part the teacher never told him she already paddled him nor did she stop it. So the principal left marks on my 5 yr old child by accident. it took him 3 days to get around to handling it and he was 4 hours late on calling to get permission since they were told not to at all.

what should i do and how should i handle this?
Hi guys. I live in the uk. What is paddling?

Spanking with a large flat piece of wood

Oh right. We don't do that over here. I think we should though.

in fact he scored way above level. ... Since then he has been put in a different class where he is doing excellent, and even received a brag letter one day for being so good and helpful and cleaning up some trash while he was out at recess. ... he does know what is acceptable and whats not. I just feel that the problem was just with this teacher. Several other school employees has said the same and all just tell me how smart, sweet and well mannered he is and how much they enjoy him.

Often kids that are advanced in school but in a grade below their intellect will get bored and frustrated and act upon it in different ways. Once they are put in classes where they feel their intellect is being challenged they do better because they do not get bored as easily.

I can't believe that they still DO THAT... and yes, it is barbaric. And the worst thing is he was HIT for HITTING. How is that supposed to teach him a lesson?

As far as the paddling goes, I would contact the superintendent then a lawyer..

I think this is absolutely sick I don't care where you are raised or how they do things in the south this is completely awful you should feel ashamed even if you are trying to reverse it now I'm sorry but that is abuse. Do abuse your child if you are letting someone else hit him he is a 5 year old child and does not deserve it people wonder why there is so much violence today because parents like you think its or to use violence with your kids and the chain continues thanks

A five year old is a good age and spanking is a great disipline technique to properly train a child when other methods do not work.
It teaches them that there are serious punishments for the greater violations of rules.

God help us all when proper child raising is not allowed any longer. No wonder home school is getting more and more popular

oneguyinohio disagrees: I don't think other methods were tried at all. Beat your kids into submission if you choose, but I don't think spanking is ever a great technique. Too many people abuse it, and it doesn't teach what it is intended to.

I agree that spanking does not teach the child what was intended. It teaches fear if spanking is done to often.

I don't think that striking a child should even be considered discipline, it's abuse.