Hi there,

Im very new at this, my husband and I are trying for our first baby and have been trying for the past 3 months... still nothing has happened. I have become a wiz at the internet as it has so much information and have learnt so much from Google.

But what confuses me as I know that 14 days after your cycle you ovulate and its when the sperm mets the egg that it becomes firtilized, and that there is a window period of about 3 to 5 days during the month that this can happen.

What about the rest of the month?? If you have unprotected sex during the rest of the month is there like no way you can get pregnant.

I know it's a silly question

No question is a silly question. I am happy to hear that you are being proactive in your reproductive health and wanting to learn as much as you can. I'll try to help. I'm a nursing student currently in maternity and fetal health and pediatric rotation now.

Now, not every woman ovulates the same time. We are all different, that 14 days is an average and is not accurate for every woman.

Once the ovum (egg) is released from the fallopian tube it has a window of 18 - 24 hours of viability to be fertilized. If not fertilized in that 18 - 24 hours it dies and is lost with menstruation. However, the sperm can live as many as 3 - 5 days inside us, so that kind of lengthens the window if you look at it that way.

You can only get pregnant when you ovulate. As I said above, that is different for every woman and the 14th day after the period is ONLY an average.

With all that said, you have only been trying for 3 months. It takes the average woman up to a year, and sometimes longer, to become pregnant with "active" trying. Meaning, the stress of "trying" can actually hinder the process of pregnancy. This is why many fertility doctors advise their patients to stop trying, go on vacation, just have fun, etc.

Most women ovulate 11-17 days after their period starts... but every woman is different. If your cycle is pretty regular, you could try this site to help you better to determine you window of peak fertility.
American Pregnancy Association : Getting Pregnant: Ovulation Calendar (http://www.americanpregnancy.org/gettingpregnant/ovulationcalendar.html?menstrual=07%2F28%2F2007&cycle=)

You are most fertile the 6 days prior to ovulating because as J9 said... your egg, if left unfertilized, starts to die quickly.
You should also note changes prior to ovulation such as your cervical fluid changing. It will change to a very wet, slippery, and stretchy discharge. Your body does this to help nourish and transport the sperm. In this environment, sperm can live up to 5 days.

Because ovulation is hard to pinpoint, I mean, you could ovulate on the 10th of one month, and ovulate on the 20th of the next month. There are many things, like stress and such, that can delay ovulation. Or, like me... I don't ovulate EVERY month. So you could fall pregnant anytime if you are not using protection.

You also could try using ovulation predictor tests to help you try and pinpoint when you should ovulate... but keep in mind, these test just PREDICT that you should ovulate, not that you actually do. So I was always getting positive tests... but sometimes I wouldn't actually release an egg.

You are in the early stages of trying, I know it's frustrating but hang in there... good luck :)

Just as the pp suggested, ovulation schedules are different for every woman. I'd like to suggest the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" by Toni Weschler.

I found this book very easy to understand and I learned a lot. It will describe ways to know if you are ovulating, pregnancy achievement methods and anatomy. In fact, I'll be using its fertility tracker soon on my own quest.

Good luck and don't be discouraged... most healthy women average 6 - 9 months to conceive. :)

Just as the pp suggested, ovulation schedules are different for every woman. I'd like to suggest the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" by Toni Weschler.

I found this book very easy to understand and I learned a lot. It will describe ways to know if you are ovulating, pregnancy achievement methods and anatomy. In fact, I'll be using its fertility tracker soon on my own quest.

Good luck and don't be discouraged.... most healthy women average 6 - 9 months to concieve. :)

Have to spread the love... I totally agree... I also have the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility"... EXCELLENT book!! I recommend it to many women Trying to conceive on AMHD :):)

Try to use this ovulation calendar tool Ovulation Calendar | Advanced Woman Calendar - pregnancy ovulation calendar by eOvulation (http://www.eovulation.com/ovulation-calendar/) to trace your cycle and find the date of ovulation.

How to calculate the menstrual cycle days? I have same problem bit I don't have regular periods..