PDA

View Full Version : Confused about love


aglover21
Oct 22, 2007, 09:22 AM
Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 8 1/2 months now, and I know that I really care about him like I've never cared about another person before. We've talked about how we are the one for each other, and how we want to eventually get married, but we haven't really told each other the famous 3 words of "I love you" yet. I can see my whole future with him in it, the fact is that I'm scared as to how I really feel about him. I've told previous guys some of the same things that I'm telling him, and I thought that I meant if before, but with him I really do mean it. I find myself second guessing how I really feel about him. When I listen to my heart it tells me to be with him and that he's the one for me, but I have all these other thoughts like "but what if you don't really feel the way you say you feel about him," and "what if you don't care about him," and "you didn't really have fun with him, you just told him that, since he said it first" I have all of these thoughts and it's so overwhelming. I just want to do right by him, and I don't want to hurt him. I've wanted for a long time to find the one for me and to get married and start a life with that person. Now I feel like I finally have that chance, and I'm running scared. I also feel to that we should already be telling each other that we love each other, but we aren't. I almost feel like we SHOULD be telling each other that, but then also feel like I'm not ready. I'm just dazed and confused and could really use someone's advice...

Thanks! :confused:

BiWiccanAndProud
Oct 22, 2007, 12:14 PM
Well simple as it is just think about it. When you are with him do you feel better then when you are apart? The last time that you were feeling way way down did he lift you right back up? If you've ever thought of losing him... do you cry? Is just the thought of him brighten your day?

Compare life without and life with him. If the thought of a life without him makes you sad and sends you in instant temporary depression, I'd say that's love. When I told my boyfriend I loved him for the first time I question if I meant it... but I look at it now and I know I love him. And I bring up the crying thing cause... I used to lay at night and the random thought of me somehow losing him sent me into instant break down and I would cry for at least an hour, just silent tears. And you may not be ready to tell him the three big words. That's normal when you've spent so long together, if you do love him, you may be scared he won't say it back... even if it's plain he will say it back.. you still worry about it. I think you're in love and just scared that even now when you two are so close something may happen to ruin your relationship, crumble what you've built, scared of rejection even though there seems no way it would happen.