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View Full Version : Potty training hell


alpar80
Oct 10, 2007, 11:00 AM
We have been trying to potty train one of our childern and it has been absolutely challenging, he just doesn't get it! We have tried everything! It has been about 7 months in the making, we are wondering if they make a diaper/underpant that makes it very uncomfortable when they go, so that they learn how to use the bathroom?

J_9
Oct 10, 2007, 11:01 AM
Before we go further into this, it is better to know the age of the child.

alpar80
Oct 10, 2007, 11:18 AM
3.5 yrs

J_9
Oct 10, 2007, 11:24 AM
Thank you.

Well, at this age he should be almost completely trained, but remember that children have their own schedules for things such as this.

Have you tried just taking the diaper away and using training pants?

It may be helpful for you to tell us what you have tried before we give you ideas that you have already used.

alpar80
Oct 10, 2007, 12:28 PM
He isn't actually our kid however one we watch everyday and it seems that his parents aren't really stepping up to bat. It is just tough to see someone who is at this age with no training and no comprehension of the action. We took the diapers away and use underwear. Sometimes he goes #1 in the potty and some days he doesn't, today he just went all overhim self and also #2, which is just impossible for him to grasp. I think he is getting babied at home and his parents aren't helping out, this is a tough one. I know it isn't our responsibility but when you have kids to watch and take care of, it would be a lot easier to have one less that you have to clean up after.

J_9
Oct 10, 2007, 12:30 PM
Unfortunately, if the parents are not going to help, then there is little you can do. He is getting conflicting messages and this just ends up confusing him.

Both you, as the caregiver, and the parents need to be on the same page as far as training goes.

Have you tried talking to the parents?

princess10
Oct 10, 2007, 12:36 PM
We have been trying to potty train one of our childern and it has been absolutely challenging, he just doesnt get it! We have tried everything! It has been about 7 months in the making, we are wondering if they make a diaper/underpant that makes it very uncomfortable when they go, so that they learn how to use the bathroom?
How old is the child, sometimes the parents start too young and frustrates the child, making the whole process take longer. Your child will eventually hate the diaper & mess and will use the toilet, be patient.

J_9
Oct 10, 2007, 12:40 PM
Princess, please read the whole thread... The child is 3 1/2 and it is not the OPs child, but rather one that she cares for.

margarita_momma
Oct 10, 2007, 01:10 PM
You might want to try a technique my daycare provider uses. My son is turning three this Saturday and is almost completely potty trained except for the occasional accident at night. She takes the kids to the restroom every 30 minutes to try and go. This gets them in the habit of going to the potty and making them realize they need to go. I would also try and talk to the parent's about the problem and see if you can get them on board. They also started making a pull-up that turns cold when the child wets themselves and it makes them uncomfortable. I'm not sure what brand makes it but I think it might be Huggies or Pampers.

lacuran8626
Oct 10, 2007, 07:25 PM
Two things that worked for me when I had a toddler -

For learning just about everything, I used "first and then". For example, "First we will clean up the toys, then we can watch Barney", "First you need to go potty in the toilet, ten we can go swimming", "First you need to put your coat on without whining, then I can take you sledding". The child was at a stop sign until he did his part.

You have to follow through. My son would not go potty, so we "ran out of time" to go swimming. He ran out of time for two days and day three he was on the potty. Same with putting his coat on. He missed a birthday party because he had to put his coat on before we could leave the house for the party. He had a tantrum for a good long time, and the party ended. It might seem mean, but he got the message and it ended the challenging for that and a lot of other things, and I did not have to constantly correct him for years to come. It was worth it for both of us!

kp2171
Oct 12, 2007, 09:52 PM
We just completely took diapers away at 3 yr, 2 mo. It was a messy, icky three weeks. Right about the time I was starting to think it was a bad, bad idea... the little man stopped messing himself. Sure, he still has the occasional I-was-playing-so-i-wet-my-pants-a-little moment... but we just lived with a mess for a couple weeks, reminded him that he could use the potty, and also did as margarita momma mentioned... took him to the bathroom a lot.

Now my wife's daughter, apparently she stopped needing diapers the second she realized she didn't need to be wet or icky. The boy took much more time.

supermommy25
Oct 13, 2007, 10:53 PM
Well I can speak from my experience my son is 3.5 also he is now fully potty trained and he sleeps with out diapers also. I started the process of trying to potty train him when he was 2 and him being in daycare at the time they also helped. What I did was buy him a training seat to go onto the toilet and in the morning I would put him on it and through out the day when I was home I would not put a diaper on him and I would put underwear on him so he would feel like a big boy. I kept doing that and it got to a point where he would go to the bathroom on his own... yeah he still wet his self but it got to a point where he would no longer boo boo on himself and that was the first step which I was very happy about because it is nothing worse than changing a big child's boo boo diaper.. lol then from there he just started telling me every time he needed to go potty and now that my funds have been low I stopped buying the diapers because they were getting to expensive so I really had to enforce the "go to the potty" rule and the " no juice before you go to bed" rule and he no longer wears pull ups and he is able to sleep with out them also... you just really have to be persistent with it and you can't give in and keep getting the diapers and letting that be it.Get him some big boy underwear make him feel like he is a big boy and if he still wets his self in the underwear trust me no one likes to keep wet underwear on.. so he won't keep doing it for long... try it see if it works because it did for me...