simranrajput
Sep 29, 2007, 03:29 AM
Hello.writing after a long time.im facing a problem which I decided to ask for a solution as it has started affecting me badly.
I've a guy in my life,although we have not as yet met in person.we met on a networking site 6months back and exchanged numbers.started of as friends.months kept on passing and I kept getting closer to him emotionally.he would encourage me with my career,motivate me to do things,cuddle me whenever I was sad,listen when I needed to talk,everyday call me as soon as he was free(he is in army so he can't manage too much of time),in fact we kept in contact all day through sms,say goodmorning and goodnite everyday,and do so many things .infact I knew when he was where doing what.we are just so understanding and compatible for each other.
As month kept passing I started liking him more than just a friend I always took care of him like a girlfriend does,bothered about his smallest of things,cared for him like his mom,did almost everything to make him happy,shared almost everything with him.after 3months I wanted that we should think of each other as more than friends,so I told him so,but he said he loved his ex so much that he can never love anyone like that again.we had quite a bit of fight and all also but he requested me to stay as his friend and try to bring him out of his past.
I did so.I started taking care of him much more than before,here and there I would always throw hints that he was not just another friend but he would always pretend as if he just doesn't know.but every time we would fight he would leave his office work and everything and talk to me,he would not eat and all.once or twice I tried to avoid him by not smsing him if he had dinner etc.he felt really bad and he called me and asked me to promise him never to neglect him as he hates to be neglected.and after every fight things always were passified and better than before.one occasion I made up a lie that I was engaged and he felt bad,he said that I never told him about any guy and that he felt lonely for sometime.anyways I told him that I wanted to see his reaction an d I had thrown a lie,I also said that he was the only guy in my life and that if I would think about anyone it would be him but it is he who would never think about me.but he said why would he not,he said he would.infact many times later he said he would think.
But recently I was talking to him and I found out that he was talking to many girls.I asked him and he said that all are his good friends like I am.I was badly pissed off.im doing everything for him and he considers me just another friend.anyways I didn't say much that day but my heart never listens to me and it kept saying same things to me.then two days later I had a dream that we were married and had a daughter named gracy and I told him about this.he has a friend name gracy too.next day he told her about this dream of mine,I found out that she was making fun of me and questioned him how could he share our private space with a third person,he was very upset for 2 days and he kept apologising and promising that he would never do that again.he said he did this only because the names were similar and he said he had committed a blunder mistake.anyways I forgave him again.he also fought with the other girl for making fun of me.
After fighting everyday with my own insticts I decided that it was no use hurting myself and hearing the same gala from him"i am a friend" so I decided to tell him what's in my mind.
Yesterday I told him very dominatingly that what was wrong with him and why can't he see that he is not just another friend.I never used the word love cause its not practical.he said what I wanted from him.I said I've been absolutely blunt on what I want and now its him who has to decide.he said I can't force him to love me.this really pissed me off badly as I've never said that,I told him what was in my heart and this was not a weakness but my strength that I could,I never asked him to love me.and I don't want to to end up being committed to a man who considers me just annother friend and gives me the importance of being his girlfriend.he said I was behaving kiddish and all.I told him I was not sorry for anything I've said cause my every effort is going in vain.he bluntly said he considered me a friend and he believes in things natural way and he is going to be the same to me like always.he is 27 I'm 23 I don't know who should be more eager to enter a relationship.everytime my mind wanders over the same facts is there anything in this relation for me?why he gives me so much importance if I'm just another friend?
Should I continue with this friendship(I don't belong to a culture where male an female remain friends ) knowing that my feelings are growing for him?
He is a very nice person and I really trust him,even talk to his sister.basically I've always felt like we are perfect for each other.I really wanted to meet him spend time with him and he had also said he would come to see me,but the fact is why would anyone come to meet just another friend and why should I go to meet just another friend!
There is nothing more to know about each other we know almost smallest things about each other.I don't say that its necessary that we should stick on if we don't like each other after meeting but the fact is at least we can think of each other and plan to meet.
I don't feel I'm wrong about my feeling cause he always gives me so much importance made me feel so and when I question him its always we are friends.
Plaese tell me what is the mind of this man,is there any future to this relation?should I be his friend and wait for the time he is ready to commit (he once said that I should give him his space and time to forget his ex)or should I move on with my life and stop talking to a man who is scared of commitments cause now I feel he is scared of commitments.and like for every man chase is better than the hunt ,he is chasing his ex who is already committed now to someone else.or is there any way I could make him fall in love with me?I really care for him and I know he needs me but it can't go on like this for long.I am falling for him although after yesterday I'm quite pissed off by his attitude.
Please tell me.
Thanking you,
Simran rajput.
I've a guy in my life,although we have not as yet met in person.we met on a networking site 6months back and exchanged numbers.started of as friends.months kept on passing and I kept getting closer to him emotionally.he would encourage me with my career,motivate me to do things,cuddle me whenever I was sad,listen when I needed to talk,everyday call me as soon as he was free(he is in army so he can't manage too much of time),in fact we kept in contact all day through sms,say goodmorning and goodnite everyday,and do so many things .infact I knew when he was where doing what.we are just so understanding and compatible for each other.
As month kept passing I started liking him more than just a friend I always took care of him like a girlfriend does,bothered about his smallest of things,cared for him like his mom,did almost everything to make him happy,shared almost everything with him.after 3months I wanted that we should think of each other as more than friends,so I told him so,but he said he loved his ex so much that he can never love anyone like that again.we had quite a bit of fight and all also but he requested me to stay as his friend and try to bring him out of his past.
I did so.I started taking care of him much more than before,here and there I would always throw hints that he was not just another friend but he would always pretend as if he just doesn't know.but every time we would fight he would leave his office work and everything and talk to me,he would not eat and all.once or twice I tried to avoid him by not smsing him if he had dinner etc.he felt really bad and he called me and asked me to promise him never to neglect him as he hates to be neglected.and after every fight things always were passified and better than before.one occasion I made up a lie that I was engaged and he felt bad,he said that I never told him about any guy and that he felt lonely for sometime.anyways I told him that I wanted to see his reaction an d I had thrown a lie,I also said that he was the only guy in my life and that if I would think about anyone it would be him but it is he who would never think about me.but he said why would he not,he said he would.infact many times later he said he would think.
But recently I was talking to him and I found out that he was talking to many girls.I asked him and he said that all are his good friends like I am.I was badly pissed off.im doing everything for him and he considers me just another friend.anyways I didn't say much that day but my heart never listens to me and it kept saying same things to me.then two days later I had a dream that we were married and had a daughter named gracy and I told him about this.he has a friend name gracy too.next day he told her about this dream of mine,I found out that she was making fun of me and questioned him how could he share our private space with a third person,he was very upset for 2 days and he kept apologising and promising that he would never do that again.he said he did this only because the names were similar and he said he had committed a blunder mistake.anyways I forgave him again.he also fought with the other girl for making fun of me.
After fighting everyday with my own insticts I decided that it was no use hurting myself and hearing the same gala from him"i am a friend" so I decided to tell him what's in my mind.
Yesterday I told him very dominatingly that what was wrong with him and why can't he see that he is not just another friend.I never used the word love cause its not practical.he said what I wanted from him.I said I've been absolutely blunt on what I want and now its him who has to decide.he said I can't force him to love me.this really pissed me off badly as I've never said that,I told him what was in my heart and this was not a weakness but my strength that I could,I never asked him to love me.and I don't want to to end up being committed to a man who considers me just annother friend and gives me the importance of being his girlfriend.he said I was behaving kiddish and all.I told him I was not sorry for anything I've said cause my every effort is going in vain.he bluntly said he considered me a friend and he believes in things natural way and he is going to be the same to me like always.he is 27 I'm 23 I don't know who should be more eager to enter a relationship.everytime my mind wanders over the same facts is there anything in this relation for me?why he gives me so much importance if I'm just another friend?
Should I continue with this friendship(I don't belong to a culture where male an female remain friends ) knowing that my feelings are growing for him?
He is a very nice person and I really trust him,even talk to his sister.basically I've always felt like we are perfect for each other.I really wanted to meet him spend time with him and he had also said he would come to see me,but the fact is why would anyone come to meet just another friend and why should I go to meet just another friend!
There is nothing more to know about each other we know almost smallest things about each other.I don't say that its necessary that we should stick on if we don't like each other after meeting but the fact is at least we can think of each other and plan to meet.
I don't feel I'm wrong about my feeling cause he always gives me so much importance made me feel so and when I question him its always we are friends.
Plaese tell me what is the mind of this man,is there any future to this relation?should I be his friend and wait for the time he is ready to commit (he once said that I should give him his space and time to forget his ex)or should I move on with my life and stop talking to a man who is scared of commitments cause now I feel he is scared of commitments.and like for every man chase is better than the hunt ,he is chasing his ex who is already committed now to someone else.or is there any way I could make him fall in love with me?I really care for him and I know he needs me but it can't go on like this for long.I am falling for him although after yesterday I'm quite pissed off by his attitude.
Please tell me.
Thanking you,
Simran rajput.