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View Full Version : Can I let him go?


Bdomo
Sep 26, 2005, 08:11 AM
I understand what everyone is saying. From my last story. I haven't been with him since March of O4. It's just we have had history and I am not desperate because I haven't had a boyfriend since then. It's just I don't know if I let him go all the way. And we are compatible we like the same things. Were just alike. I am not sure if he still loves me. I had wanted him back for so long and he did too but was scared I was going to hurt him again. And now I don't know if I should be his friend or what. Through this year we still have been back and forth. I accidentally did something with him this past year and I got mad at him and told him I never want to speak to you again. Because, I was upset that he would do that to his girlfriend. Have sex with me. So we didn't speak f or like 3 months or so. So then we eventually reconciled and we talk a little bit now but, something is not the same. Then I come to find out later that he had broke up that time when we did something. They got in a argument or something and weren't together for that week. But, now he is away at another school and before he left he popped up at my house to see me before he left. And I wasn't there and I am glad I wasn't because old feelings would have sparked. But for some reason I know he is going to pop up on christmas break. I just want to know should I stay friends with him. Because, we were friends first and we get along better a little bit. Can I let him go?

shenda
Sep 26, 2005, 08:59 AM
I take it that he is quite skilled and he is great to pal around with, yet there is a question that you have neglected to answer... Do you want him? You are so focused on letting him go, somewhat questioning his integrity without assuming your portion of responsibility.

At the time of your encounter, you did not know the true status of your beloved and above all, it did not truly matter to you because your focus was on having sex. After the fact, you questioned his integrity without considering your intent... you were a willing participant. Nonetheless, time revealed that you questioned his integrity in vain.

If you are going to value the relationship after it lapse, why not introduce/invest that same energy into the relationship while it is still afresh. Be honest; however, before proceeding, is it the sex you are after or do you geniunely embrace the essence of the man. I ask because I get the impression that you would prefer to keep him as a Friend with benefits... the fact that you are not seeking another boyfriend suggests that you desire to remain sexually faithful to this guy... you want to release him, but he is quite skilled. If it is the guy you are interested in, let your intent be known, tell him that you want a do-over... and in doing so... trust. If your position is one of friend w/benefit... tell him so; however, eventually you may want a total package so never sell yourself short

Tony2005
Sep 26, 2005, 09:27 AM
This is quite complicated because you are not sure what you really want. You just bumped into this situation and wonder what to do next. Instead of knowing what he is up to, you need to know what you are up to. He could be a really nice friend and you could really get along with him. But this doesn't end here. You got to know what you are looking for. It also appears that you are getting a little possessive about him. You wouldn't like him to behave with others the way he is with you. Probably, this is where you got to be careful. Being possessive about him will only make you more insecure. Just know what you want, what you are looking for and then decide.

Wildcat21
Sep 26, 2005, 11:55 AM
You need to see him and decide. Woman don't know what they want until it's starring them in the FACE!! - Letmeno confirmed this! You need to see him. When you have this distance you're unsure.

I normally don't say this, but next time you see him you must resolve this. Tell him how you feel - but first see IF there is still that feelings. Sometimes, when at a distance want that person - yet, when we see them we really don't care anymore.

Being friends is extremely important in a relationship.