Hi I have an important question... I was severely under the influence, and had unprotected sex with my friend and he ejaculated twice inside of me... this happened on Friday and its only Monday, but I'm really stressing about it. I know I have a high chance of being pregnant but is there a good possibility I'm not?:(... I personally can't use morning after pills because of my beliefs.

I'd say there is mostly a chance of you being pregnant. I guess there could be a small chance of you not getting pregnant.

Where are you in your cycle? Why didn't you get Plan B (the morning after pill)?

Depending on your cycle there is a very good chance that you are pregnant.

My question is, and please don't bash me for it, if your beliefs prevent you from using the morning after pill, shouldn't your beliefs prevent you from premarital or unprotected sex?

Yea they do, I know it isn't an excuse but I just started college and I let the freedoms of being alone and away from my parents get the best of me. I usually get my period towards the end of the month around the 22nd-27th. My last period I had from those dates last month

So you aren't even due for your period yet for another week or so. Unfortunately, that will be too late for the morning after pill, even if you believed in it.

I hate to say this, but you now are playing the waiting game. You need to wait now to see when, and if, you get your period. There is really nothing more we can help you with except support you and help you through this time.

I'm not trying to preach at you by any means but please be careful in college. Too often too many young girls get away from home for the first time drink too much and become victims of date rape. Your friends are people who you have just met and you never know what could happen. When I was in college we never let a girl go anywhere by herself unless see was leaving with her boyfriend.

I would also get tested for STD's. You never know.

Hang in there sweetie. I've done the waiting game before. It really is an eye-opening experience.

Thank you all for your help and support it means a lot to me, I don't have anyone to turn to, and my so called friend won't pick up his phone

thank u all for your help and support it means alot to me, i dont have anyone to turn to, and my so called friend wont pick up his phone

I'm not surprised out all. It sounds like he got what we wanted out of your friendship. What a complete rat!

I am so sorry that this happened to you. Whatever you do don't beat yourself up. This guy took advantage of you in a drunken state. He is the bad guy here. I certainly hope that everything will turn out well for you in this situation.

Please feel free to vent out here. I know how hard it can be first time away and not really knowing anyone yet.

This is a big one for sure. PG, STDs, won't answer phone, knew you were smashed, you have to wait, no one to confide in and you feel like a cat on a hot tin roof. First see a nurse-practitioner. Second, start a very detailed account of the night you rode drunk in central park. Third, do not confide in friends or family members of your past partner. Now you can contact a attorney who will probably offer 1/2 hr. free consultation. FINI: Your issue/s with MA-pill is fine. Are there acceptions to this rule, including abortion in cases of non consensual unprotected sex resulting in preg/s? This one is for you to deal with and if your wise you'll come out of this just fine.

I mean I made a mistake as well. I decided to get drunk, and I decided to put myself in that situation, did I mention he's 29? Yea I made lots of mistakes so if I'm pregnant I'm going to have the baby and take care of it. I can't see myself getting an abortion, but I do want to thank you guys again for your point of views, and for helping me

He's 29? Oh geez... something tells me this wasn't this guys first foray into the "taking advantage of drunk young girls" arena.

Should I continue trying to contact him, or just face it alone?

Hell, I'm a B!tch, so I'd call him and tell him that I was pregnant, whether I knew or not. If he doesn't answer, I'd show up at his place/class/parent's house crying.

Sounds like a jerk, and I'd get back at him any way I could.

I am, however, a vindictive witch, so... by no means should you use me as an example.

Send the guy a text telling him you're thinking that you never want to hear from him again, and that you'll have your lawyer contact him regarding paternity testing. Bet you get a call within an hour.

This is a perfect example why you should not be getting drunk or stoned. Something most adults have learned by their late 20's. Harsh but to the point.

should i continue tryin to contact him, or just face it alone?

I agree with Synnen completely. If you find out that you are pregnant or have an STD or whatever I would proceed much in the manner that she recommends. Especially if you are pregnant you will have a right to child support, medical help while pregnant the whole nine yards. So while this guy thinks he's really slick that he'll just have sex with you and fall off the face of the earth I would pull his butt back onto the planet.

What does your 29 year old friend do for a living? No you don't face this alone. You face it with a medical and legal professional and you see that he provides financial support as per court order and not word of mouth (his). Forgot to ask why your not on the pill. Best wishes.

This is a perfect example why you should not be getting drunk or stoned. Something most adults have learned by their late 20's. Harsh but to the point.

Hey we all have to learn sometime... :) college seems to be the time and place for most.

hey we all have to learn sometime... :) college seems to be the time and place for most.Unfortunately that's when and why quite a few unwanted babies are conceived as well.

I'm was on the pill but I left them at home when I moved here by accident... I know another huge mistake. My "friend" is a vice principal for a high school. Oh and he finally text me. I asked him why he was ignorin me and he said it was because he worked and needed time alone, which is a lie because schools are closed on the weekend. I told him I think I might be pregnant and he called me paranoid and stopped textin me... but I mean I know its still early to assume I'm pregnant but he came in me twice, which is a pretty good reason to assume I am.

What is he doing hanging out at a college party?

Unfortunately we weren't at a college party, we were hangin out. We met about a month or so ago caz I was walking around a shopping center and he kind of just started talking to me. When we were hangin out he suggested playing a card game called high or low and normally I don't drink but he said he would dilute my drinks to make sure I didn't get drunk, but I did anyway

He made the drinks? I doubt they were diluted.

The more information that is coming out it sounds as if he was planning on getting you drunk and taking advantage of you.

Do you remember the act itself? Did you ever say no? If you said no even once this is criminal.

This is screaming date rape now. I agree with Glinda.

I wish you had thought to go get looked at the morning after. He may have even slipped you a drug. It happens all the time. Did you have any memory fogginess the next day? Were you unable to remember large pieces of the nights events?

He made the drinks? I doubt they were diluted.

The more information that is coming out it sounds as if he was planning on getting you drunk and taking advantage of you.

do you remember the act itself? did you ever say no? If you said no even once this is criminal.
Very good point... something is smelling fishy here.

Just wanted to add: Were you a student at the high school he works for? Did the two of you have earlier relations? This seems to be turning into a screen play. Is he married? Best wishes and good luck.

No I didn't go to his high school, but he said alazay wasn't really a liqour, it was more fruity so he mixed it with vodka, I threw up, but I remember most of it... it wasn't rape because I didn't say no. and no he's single

Alize IS liquor AND he mixed it with vodka. Unbelievable.

This guy was DEFINITELY looking to get you drunk and take advantage.

EDIT

Do you feel that what he did was okay because you let yourself get drunk?

If it was me I would be much angrier.

I think its partly my fault because I knew I would end up drunk and I didn't say no. I put myself in the situation... and can you believe the most he can say is worrying doesn't help. I'll be fine!

Was he has drunk as you? My guess is no because if he was he would've had a hard time getting & maintaining an erection and having one orgasm let alone two.

My question is how many times before has he done this to other girls? He seems to have his act down pretty good... it seems like he has had lots of practice. Sweetie, I know you feel bad because you "put yourself in that situation"... but this chap made it worse. He took a naïve girl and threw the reality book at her. It seems odd that he is going for girls so much younger than he is... From someone with experience in the educational field, this is highly immoral behavior... especially for a high school vice principal. People in education are expected to abide by higher standards... especially those that directly influence high school students. Sweetie, I know you don't want to think this... but you were used. I would seriously consult an attorney. How many other girls has he done this to? I seriously doubt you were the first one that this has happened with. This guy sounds like a real pro.

He was pretty drunk to but but he wasn't as drunk as me because he was taking shots of one or the other... either alazay or vodka, and the card game was whoever lost had to take a shot, but he kept winnning, plus he held his liquor much better than I did. I know I was used but right now my biggest problem is the pregnancy. If I am than I will consult a lawyer but the idea of me being a mother has me scared to death. I'm an emothional wreck and people are even starting to notice my behavior changes. This waiting is killing me. How can I support a child by myself when I can't even support me? I find myself completely zoning out. I don't even go outside anymore except to class and back home afterwards. I'm expecting my period on Saturday, if I don't get it, can I take the test the same day?

This guy is such a rat. I want to ring his neck.

We probably thinks its no big deal but he doesn't see that he is potentially throwing a huge wrench into your life. This guy is a dirtbag and it just angers me beyond belief that he is a Vice President at a High School. I can totally see this guy trying to get with his charges upon graduation.

Thank u guys so much for your help and support

IF you are pregnant he will have to provide child support to take care of your child.

I hope and will pray for you to not be pregnant. You are just starting in your life and I'd hate to see a guy like this be stuck in your life for the next 18 years.

He's such a jerk, he thinks this whole thing is a joke, its funny I liked him cause he is older and I thought he'd be more mature but I guess he liked me cause I'm young and immature. Apparently according to him I'm a negative person and I need to relax! Does anyone think I'm over-reacting? I mean I do have something to worry about right?

YES of course you do.

He thinks its nothing to worry about since the baby isn't "his" problem its yours. What a complete dirty double no good rat.

I with Star I bet that he has done this to quite a few girls before.

It just goes to show that just because a guy is older doesn't mean that he is mature. I've dated plenty of guys like that believe me!

And I totally get what you were thinking. You probably thought it would be safe to drink with this guy and that you could get drunk and not worry and here he goes and acts like a total sleezebag. He just totally preyed upon you.He saw that you were young and naïve and he probably thought it would be pretty easy to scam on you.

All I can say is what goes around comes around.

You do have something to worry about. Mr. Sleeze doesn't see this as a problem because he is thinking that this isn't going to affect his life at all. What he doesn't know is that if you are pregnant, he may end up with a child support bill that will definitely cramp his lifestyle. Asst principals usually make pretty good money and the more he makes, the more he will need to pay... especially since you are a college student. You are not over reacting. It is a very freaky experience to go through an unplanned pregnancy... or to think you are pregnant... but it is do-able. I graduated college and I had an unplanned pregnant in my soph year of college. It took me longer to graduate, but I did it.

Wow Star that's amazing. It must have felt like an even better accomplishment. I cannot imagine what that must've took. But I guess when pushed we all find some pretty serious inner strength.

I actually found myself more focused after having my child than before. I made every second of study time count because I never knew when I was going to be able to study again. We all find ways to pull out our inner strength in tough times. It is the tough times that help you realize how strong of a person you can be. You can get through this sweetie. We are here for you! Just remember, everything happens for a reason. From every tough situation we gain knowledge about ourselves and others. God doesn't give you more than you can handle... although at times he had more faith in me than I did. It sounds like you are a person of faith. Now would be a great time to bring that back into your life. It will give you the peace you are looking for. I've been there. :O)

So if I'm pregnant do I tell a lawyer then? Or do I wait until I have the baby?

Sweetie, you need to take it one step at a time. Don't get yourself worked up over something that you are not sure of.

Let's find out if you are pregnant, then take it from there.

He's trying to make you second guess yourself. He's trying to make it out to be no big deal. He is hoping that if he can convince you that it is no big deal, then you will agree it is no big deal. Whether you are pregnant, it is a big deal.
I would wait to find out if you are pregnant and then take it from there. I know the waiting is hard. I am not good at waiting in general, so when I had to "wait my time"... it made it even worse. Try to occupy your time. Don't dwell. Keep as busy as possible. Study, go out with friends (female ones :O) ), go to church, exercise... keep as busy as possible. If you don't... you will have grey hairs by the time you are 22.
Renting some really funny (non-romantic) movies usually helps put a lighter spin on things too. Just stay busy.

Your right, but I mean should I try and speak to him more about it? Get him to understand how serious this is?

your right, but i mean should i try and speak to him more about it? Get him to understand how serious this is?

Based on what you have said about him I would think that would be about as effective as smashing your head into the wall repeatedly.

I'd say leave this guy be since all he is doing is making you feel like garbage. If you are pregnant then you can contact him if you are not then I would delete this guy from your life permanently and if he comes near you again mace him until he's blind!

so if i'm pregnant do i tell a lawyer then? or do i wait til i have the baby?
I agree, first find out if you are pregnant first... if no consider this a wake up call to never forget. If you are then I'd make sure he is on notice to start paying part of the bills you are going to have and call a lawyer, or if you decide to not have the kid to get an abortion before its too late.

Several options here, but you have to take things one step at a time.

I had to laugh at your answer Glinda, I was thinking the same thing. Thanks for making me laugh Sweetie... I needed it. :O)

OK, thanks you guys have been so much help, and I'm grateful for all the advice. But I need some advice on something else. I called planned parenthood clinic to get a STI testing and a pregnancy test , but they said without insurance it would cost near $140 and I honestly don't have any money at all... where I'm from the clinic does it free. Does anyone know of any clinics that does free testing? I have insurance but I'm scared to use it because my mother is getting federal assistance which means my insurance is also federal assistance and when my sister thought she was pregnant and went to the doctor to get a test done they mailed a letter to my mothers case worker asking to verify a pregnancy. And I don't want that to happen.

Call Planned Parenthood again and talk to them about the rate. I went in when I was in college to be tested for STD's and they do have a sliding scale for payments.

What about your college's medical office? In college my medical office could run blood work testing for STD's and pregnancy. You may want to check with them. At my college they had a gynecologist come in once or twice a week and you could get checked out through them at not cost.

Okay thank you... I'm going to go there tomorrow to ask about it...

Okay update:
I went to the nurse today. She set an appointment for Monday. But my period is expected to come on Saturday so I guess I'll know by this weekend. I'm trying not to stress because I hear stress can cause you to miss your period. But its so hard because I keep thinking what if? My friends are telling me to just abort it if I am... that everythings OK. But its not that easy, you know?

I know it's a tough spot. Even if you are not pregnant ------- how about when you get your pregnant since you're not pregnant I would still get the STD test.

Yea I'm going to get that done definitely, when I get the pregnancy test

okay update:
I went to the nurse today. she set an appointment for monday. But my period is expected to come on saturday so i guess i'll know by this weekend. I'm trying not to stress because i hear stress can cause you to miss your period. But its so hard because i keep thinking what if? My friends are telling me to just abort it if i am...that everythings ok. but its not that easy, ya know?
Abortion might cost something if you do end up pregnant, but its still cheaper than actually having the kid and raising it for 18 years. I'd save actually having a kid until you are with someone who will help you raise it.

Abortion might cost something if you do end up pregnant, but its still cheaper than actually having the kid and raising it for 18 years. I'd save actually having a kid until you are with someone who will help you raise it.


I say let's cross that bridge when we come to it. All of my energy is going towards you getting your period (first time I've ever said that ;) ) I intend it with all my abilities.

I say let's cross that bridge when we come to it. All of my energy is going towards you getting your period (first time I've ever said that ;) ) I intend it with all my abilities.
Lets hope she isn't... then this can be considered an import lesson in life.

OK I'm suppose to get my period today at some point, everybody pray for me please

I'm willing it for you doll!!

hes such a jerk, he thinks this whole thing is a joke, its funny i liked him cause he is older and i thought he'd be more mature but i guess he liked me cause i'm young and immature. apparently according to him i'm a negative person and i need to relax! Does anyone think i'm over-reacting? i mean i do have something to worry about right?

READ THIS after you find out your not pregnant. We are with you on this one. Best wishes.

Good luck kiddo. We are praying for you...

Okay quick question... I haven't gotten my period yet but my roommate says my cycle starts the last day of my period... but I read just now on the web I should count fom the first day of my last period. Which ones right?

First day of last period

OK so it still hasn't come, and I have been getting it in the morning when I wake up as long as I can remember. If by Monday it still hasn't come, would it be to soon to take the test?

Depends on the test you use. They have different sensitivies. I just looked online and they should pick it up on the first day of your missed period, but would be most accurate a week after the missed period.

They will not give a false positive... but they can give a false negative. It says if you get a negative wait a couple of days and try again. This is because the human growth hormane, that the tests test for, doubles every few days. Also morning urine is most concentrated and would be most likely to pick it up if its early.

Good news finally! I took a first response test today and the results were negative and I got my period also a little while ago. Whew I feel so much better. I've never been this happy before. Thank you all for your support and help, and don't worry I've learned so much from this. This will definitely be one mistake I do not repeat. Thank you all again.

WOO HOO!!

I was thinking about you all day today and I kept saying "please let her get her period! please let it come. that poor girl don't let it not come!"

I'm so happy for you. You must've been elated when it came!

WOW!! Nice to hear the news.

Glad to hears it... you dodged the bullet this time.

No more booze.(keep in full control).. no more unprotected sex.(std's or worse)... ever for any reason. Next time you may not be as lucky.

hi i have an important question.... i was severely under the influence, and had unprotected sex with my friend and he ejaculated twice inside of me... this happened on friday and its only monday, but i'm really stressing about it. i know i have a high chance of being pregnant but is there a good possibility i'm not?:(.... i personally can't use morning after pills because of my beliefs.
Your situation recently happened to my co worker. A one time deal and she was pretty worried too. Good news for her, she ended up not being pregnant. So try not to stress too much. You might be okay.