Hi.. I'ts kind of strange 3 years before I meet a girl she was 12 years old and I was 15 and we had a relationship for one year ( not an open one) but we use to see each other and we write letters , sms, we use to give gifts etc etc, Everytime when I looked to her it was like slowmotion times for me I enjoy everysingle moment with her also I thonk she did with me but we use to see each other "behind the scenes" because no one wanted to see us together and so just me and her friends know that we were in a kind of relationship.
I didn't force her to do something more because I understand she was young also me . So a year later when I was on my summer holidays something happened , when I came back everything seems so cold and I looked for a reason where was I doing bad ( and I must accept I'm very jealous ) so I start asking my friend also her friend , and what I got it was thet my best friend started to get near to her and talk bad thing's for me (he even said to her that I was sick ) but I was vert jealous and I blameher for everything , I said to her 'why she didn't tell me that he was after her" (all this started when she accepted me and not him , year before). this problem last a long time like a month and so all that time we where talking on msn , or sending sms ( kids stuff) i couldnt do anything more (it was a very bad feeling that last for a month) so once we where talkin on msn and we had a fight and she said to me that we didnt have anything betwen us ani i was for her just a simpaty and so i was wery angry and i said to her " of" and so i said to some friend that she was a and this word got into her ear and she was mad and she said to her friend that she never didnt wait somethong like this from me and that she loved me before. One month pass by and i realy miss her and i started to ask her (but she said just friends we can be nothing more) once i thought it was a good idea but when times goes bu i could stop my fealings for her " I couldn't treat her like a friend" .
So we didn't see each other for three years and she ahs gone to another city on college so I see her sometimes when she comes for hollidays in strreat (just hi - hi) .
I had a lot of girlfriend after her but I still feel her, when I go out with my girlfriend I always think of her . 3 years pass and I still think for her and I know that it is imposible to get her back because meaby she has got someone and I was her bad experience and she is after school and so etc.
I don't know what is the problem with me :confused:

I'm thirty years old and I still think about my first love from time to time, that was fifteen years ago! I'am now happily married and I love my husband like I have never loved any other. I don't know why first loves are so hard to forget, no one does. Isn't it strange how you really don't remember second and thirds? ONLY FIRSTS! Anyway, the good news is you will love again, and it will be more powerful then anything you have ever experienced before!

Well it wasn't my first love : just the title someone here "admins" have change it to "First love" it was " stuck :S:S:S)
Anyway thanks for the reply .:)

I feel sometimes that I am completely lost :

All my mates say they can all just remember they're first love but I'm really different I remember all my olves and exactly how I felt towards each one but I always love the person I presently love and no one else.. kind of weird lol