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thood0228
Aug 26, 2007, 06:53 PM
I have been seeing a married guy for 5 years I want to be with him but he says he's afraid of losing his material things and what his son might think which is 27 years old because of his son being family orientated might think of him he says he wants to be with me and always says give him more time when I try to do the right thing by ending it he cries and says he doesn't want to lose me to give him more time like 6 months I am single and he's older than me 20 years I never meant for it to go on this long he said when he met me that his marriage had been sour for 4 years I have told him numerous times to try and work it out with her and numerous times have ended it he says he is not going to let me go he is good to me and helps me financially I don't know his wife never met her but I told him he's not being fair to me nor her he works in law enforcement and I feel like if I end it it might make him think about what decision to make I don't want to be with him if he gets busted I want him to be with me cause he chose me and loves me so I'm trying to do the right thing he says he can't let go of me I wrote him a letter to say we need a break so he can figure out if I'm important enough for his life but his response to the letter was I'll see you tomorrow well what to do about this I love him would give anything to be with him and have but isn't 5 years long enough

GlindaofOz
Aug 26, 2007, 07:01 PM
If he hasn't left his wife in 5 years he is never going to leave his wife. He is giving you the married man script to keep you complacent. He is never leaving his wife. He is never leaving his wife.

If a man is so unhappy in his marriage and has found love with someone else do you not think that he would do whatever is necessary in order to be with the love all the time? Don't you think he would value that love over material possessions? Also, if his kid is over the age of 10 he knows his parents don't have a good marriage. If the kid is a teenager he probably knows his dad is cheating. His wife probably knows he is cheating on her. He is with you because he gets to have the stability of a wife and family and whatever he wants on the side. He is having his cake and eating it too.

You need to run far away from this situation. Seek counseling to find out why you pursue a relationship with a man who is completely unavailable to you in every way.

serena6878
Aug 26, 2007, 07:05 PM
Is it because you are much younger than his wife that he loves you? But you would be old some day too. His wife spent her youth for him and gave him a family. You are enjoying your happiness at the expense of the suffering of others.

Your parents must love you. His wife's parents love her as much as yours. They believe he could give her a happy future and everlasting commitment. If you someday had your children, and when they become adults they are cheated by husbands, will you be sad and regret your judgment of son-in-law?

Love is not selfish. You should stop, and set a good example for your children.

Homegirl 50
Aug 26, 2007, 07:06 PM
Girl that man would leave is wife if he wanted to, but why should he. You're there and stay there. If he has not left her for you in five years what makes you think he will or even wants to.
He has a young thing he can play with at his leisure.
Karma is a b***h girlfriend. You need to leave alone that which does not belong to you. The man is a cheater. What makes you think if he did leave his wife, he would be faithful to you. Open your eyes and get a brain and some morals. Messing with a married man is not only stupid, but it's low down.