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View Full Version : Middle Child Syndrome/Joining the Military


sGt HarDKorE
Aug 15, 2007, 12:05 AM
Ok I have two questions to ask, but they go together so I just wanted to make one thread.

I am wondering if middle child syndrome is real? I am asking this because of three children, I am the middle one. My older sister is 20, and I have a younger brother. Well for some reason everything I do mostly academic wise is always compared to my sister. Im going to be taking almost all honors and ap classes next year and my mom still isn't happy with it. She constantly says "Your sister took the hardest classes you can, why can't you!". And I tell her I am just not smart enough, as although I get all A's, I get through the holes in the school system. Such as in english class, I never got tested on the things I need help on, like using commas, spelling, etc... I use to be a total failure, I use to get all F's and got in trouble a lot. I only changed to make my mom happy and yet she isn't. My brother gets D's and C's and my mom doesn't care. She goes and buy's him a xbox 360, a new cellphone, new TV, etc..
My mom pays a lot of attention to my younger brother and older sister. My mom is always like "You must be just like your sister when you grow up, don't drink, don't go to parties. I try to tell her I am not my sister... What can I do to stop the stress from her always complaining? It is really messing up my life and is making my life a lot worse. Anyway her is my other question, I really want to join the military but that only makes my mom more mad. She thinks I'm just going to run in and get shot. My mom says the military is for failures, which I take offensively. I really want to make a difference and I don't really care if I was killed in the act. I figure that since we all die eventually, mine as well die doing something excitting. Is there anything wrong with the military?

Let me know if you know anything on how to solve both of these problems, thanks!

templelane
Aug 15, 2007, 12:13 AM
Can answerm the middel child thing (older child) but a come form a military background athough a different country. If you get good grades and go to collage then can you join as an officer (as in my country)? What's failing about that? Just try not to listen to her she is just getting on your back because she cares. She probably gave you're sister a hard time too but when you weren't there/ in a way you didn't realise.

Do what you think will make you happy :)

Capuchin
Aug 15, 2007, 12:13 AM
Your sister is her "old and responsible" child.

Your brother is her "little baby".

You don't fit into either slot, and it's not your fault at all. It takes a lot of rational thought to be a fair parent, and it's not surprising that many people cannot do it very well. I don't know what you can do to stop her from treating you this way. Maybe you need to sit down with her and talk about it, but her feelings will be deep and it will be hard to do.

sportzislifesarah92
Aug 15, 2007, 03:39 PM
well I don't really no if there is a Middle Child Syndrome or not but I'm sort of a middle child and I sometimes feel like this. [there our 4 of us. I have two older brothers and a younger sister] sometimes I feel like I can never messure up to my brothers they've done sports and made all the teams and get good grades and our "perfect" as my mom says. But then I remember that we're all human and all make mistakes. I'm sure your mom just wants you to get all you can out of life. Try talking to your mom. Like real talking not yelling or arguing. [this is hard to do for me sometimes. I'm a daddy's girl] just explain to her that your not your sister. That not even your sister isn't perfect. That your trying as hard as you can for her. Maybe try talking to your sister. Call her up and say how's it going and than explain to her about you and your mom and all of this. That always helps me. I used to think my brothers were so perfect and I'll never be like them. And I've learned that my brothers go to parties, r wild, and get in trouble just like me. We all have our hard times and we are only human but in the end your mom should understand. And if she doesn't then just talk to your dad and he'll probably tell you your fine. Or talk to your friends. They r probably going through all the same things. Like I'm sure older kids feel pressure to set the standard for us little kids. And how much younger kids than us look up to us. Just no matter what just try to be all you can and if you truly are then it doesn't matter what your mom says. You make your own choices. =]

bebo1
Aug 15, 2007, 03:47 PM
Well iknow how you feel I'm a middle child too and know that my sister will always be the first to do things and my little brother will always be the last to do stuff so I feel your pain...

xxmissconfusedxx
Aug 15, 2007, 06:02 PM
Okay I can not really relate but my family consists of 5 children and my second brother(middle child) never seem to get yelled and I (youngest) always seem to be introuble for something he did

Example. I went to a friends house after school to go to the movies and ended up getting back to her house quite late and her mother call my mom to see if I could sleep over but her mom never got ahold of mine she ended up talking to my brother(middle) and he said it was all right and he would tell my mom HE NEVER DID. Then I get home at like 5:30 in the morning and come in to hear my mom screaming at me because my brother never relayed the message then I told her that my friends mom called and she didn't beileve me and I got grounded forever and my brother got away with it and when he told my mom she just brushed it off and I was still grounded and terribly upset.

I'm not sure if my story had to do with anything but I was just stating my Middle sibling gets away with anything he is 20 yrs old and lives at home no job,not going to school smokes like it's going out of style and is a complet slob never cleans up after himself and is treated like gold then me on the other hand I go to school, am looking for a job, and try to clean up after myself and still get introuble for everything