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caroline 71
Aug 6, 2007, 06:44 AM
Hello this is my first time asking a question so please bare with me. I am 26yrs old and am seeing a guy who is younger than I. We have already established that we are not looking to begin a serious relationship. The other night we had intercourse for the first time and on my part it was great even though I am really conscious of my body and a bit insecure. The problem was it was great and he seemed to be o.k yet never was able to ejaculate. I began asking myself if it was because of me or he didn't feel anything, or he was nervous, or he was turned of. See he wanted to continue, and never lost his erection so I am really confused. I asked him what he thought and he said he does not know what happened that it has never happened before, and he usually ejaculates really soon during sex.
Any suggestion or response will be gladly received.
Thank you

J_9
Aug 6, 2007, 06:47 AM
Sounds like nerves to me. It was your first time, he may have had performance anxiety. Unless he is on any medication that may cause this, I wouldn't worry.

smoothy
Aug 6, 2007, 06:48 AM
I'll agree nerves on his part... or he spanked his monkey one time too many to take the edge of the first encounter so he didn't pop too quick. First time with a woman makes a guy quick to get off. Its an old trick to do so you don't get a reputation as a "minute man" based on one encounter. He might have overdone it.

kp2171
Aug 7, 2007, 06:18 AM
Nerves.

Had he been drinking at all? I know you said he didn't have a problem with the erection...

Don't freak out about this. It can cause a bad cycle, where since he didn't get there he's self conscious, which makes it harder to get lost in the moment, which again makes it harder to get there.

So did he get you to climax? One issue is maybe he was holding back for you. There are times when I'm really primed that I could go fast, but I mentally push it back to be fair to my partner. Well, in time the sensations, though they still feel great, diminish some. It can make it harder to get there, since you've already mentally blocked it once.

So perhaps he was too focused on performing well, couldn't get lost in the moment...

And if its none of the above, that there was something that he liked or wanted but didn't get or that you just weren't in "synch", well, that can come with time, talk, and practice.