nick88
Jul 26, 2007, 11:41 AM
Hi I know my username is nick88 but in fact I am a girl so don't think it's a boy talking about his boyfriend. Lol anyway I need some help on my relationship situation.
I've been going out with my boyfriend for about a year now. It has has its ups and downs. I feel like I deserve someone better but I don't know if it's that or if its what I want to think. In the beginning I was very happy with my decision of going out with him but now we always fight. We fight about the littlest things and we piss each other off at times. I feel like he never supports me in anything, like he disagrees with me and it seems like he always wants to be right about everything. And when he thinks he is right he stays with it and acts all cocky about it. Sometimes he tells me, "what dont you have a brain? are you retarded?" I mean is this acceptable for him to tell me this. He sometimes hurts my feelings. For example I don't work well in fact I have never worked and I'm almost 19. He is almost 20 and he has been working since he was 15. So when we go out and he doesn't have money, he tells me if I can buy it so I would ask how much is it. And he would be like when I pay for stuff do I ever ask how much? Nooo and I would say well its my money I don't have a lot. And he would say its not your money. You don't earn your money its your dads money. And I would say I no but it's the money my dad gave me so therefore its my money now. I feel like when we are with his friends and he talk about me, He makes me seem like a lowlife girl who is dumb and can't take care of herself. Some other example would be: well this in fact actually happened last night I will tell you the story. My boyfriends friend invited us to come over to swim in his pool. My brother of eleven years old wants to go and my mom tells me if he can come, but niether did I or my boyfriend wanted him to come. I mean it is kind of weird for my 11 year old brother to hang out with his 18 year old sister you know? But he was crying that he wanted to go. My boyfriend starts bugging out and says "who cares about him, lets just leave, my mom would never ask me to bring my brother." Well I felt bad so I left, my mom then calls me back and says where did you go I thought you were going to bring your brother and so I went back and picked him up. We brought him to the pool even though my boyfriends friend bugged out and told us to go back home and forget it. Well I called him back and he said all right so we went. We had a good time and all, it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. When we left my boyfriends friends dad calls him and said that my boyfriend nor I are allowed to go to the pool because he saw some little kid who he doesn't know in his pool. I thought this was ridiculous because it wasn't like it was some stranger. His dad knows me and knows who I am. Well my boyfriend and his friend are saying its my fault. My boyfriend starts saying nasty things to me like yea its your fault because if you weren't sush a (sorry for my language, but this is what he said) then you would stick up for yourself and tell your mom straight up no. And I was like well what did you want me to do I told her no and I left. Then he starts saying how from the beginning they were saying no and stuff, but no one specifically told me he is not allowed to come. They just made it seem that they didn't want him there that's all but I mean who would want a little kid hanging out with them right? My boyfriend then says "what dont you have a brain?, its an obvious knowing that he wasnt allowed to come so therefore its your fault." I seriously don't think its my fault because like I said no one told me he wasn't allowed to come. And then we jump to fact of me saying well I can't say what you would say to your parents because you don't give a f*** about anything and say the hell you want. I said how he was raised differently and stuff. I actually come from a hispanic family and he is from an american family even though he if half irish and half italian. Well then he has the nerve to tell me that I wasn't even raised that my parents molded me into what they wanted me to be and that their parenting skills are horrible. While he is telling me this, he not screaming. He is talking and this is how talks on a normal basis when he thinks he is right. I started getting mad because he disrepects my family and our beliefs. I told my mom what happened and she also thinks its ridiculous that we can't go to the pool anymore because I brought my little brother. I seriously do. My boyfriend then says something like "well us italians think like this and we all have this problem. blah blah blah" he says "its crazy how races think differently." but I actually don't think just because they are italian they think like that and if all italians think like this, its horrible because I just see it from my point of view. Say I had a pool and my friends boyfriends little sister wanted to come. Nor I or my parents would have no problem with that. Its just a little kid. I mean everyone was a kid once right. And it not like I don't know who my friends boyfriend is. I mean my boyfriend, his friend and I are like a trio I know him very well.
Yes I know its very long but I just want to explain every detail of it just so you can understand how my boyfriend is and how he thinks. I am not done yet there's some other things I want to lay down about him.
Well my boyfriend is not a big fan of colored people and even spanish people in that matter. He says that he doenst have a prolblem with me because I was raised like a normal white family does. That's because my dad makes money and I'm spoiled and I act white. You know I like techno, I wear hollister and abercrombie. That whole stuff. Like I don't act spanish you know? Well to what he thinks how they act. And so he hates going to my family parties because I'm not allowed to drink and because he doesn't understand spanish and because people at my parties are weird. Well he also makes it seem like italians are the best. OMGGG and right at this moment he just called me because we usually talk on the phone when he's not doing anything at work. Okay so he said that he was afraid to call me because what if my parents picked up it would be weird. And I was like how would that be weird. And he was like well because I might be the only white person who would ever call your phone. I mean I feel offended to that and when he talks about racist situations.
Something else that I want to add that he doesn't have a car and doesn't drive so I drive everywhere and its really annoying. I feel like I'm the boyfriend in the relationship. Also he is not romantic at all. He doesn't give me surprises or cute stuff like that. He also eats very unhealthy and he doesn't work out. I mean I love him very very much I really do but I don't no I need help.
I honestly think I can do better. Is something wrong with me that I think this way or do I really deserve someone better? Like am I the only one who has a problem with this or is it normal. Im thinking of dumping him but I don't want to make it a mistake. Just to let it out there I dumped him twice but they weren't serious real break ups. The first one lasted a half hour and the second like 3 days. But this time I'm seirously thinking about doing it for good. I mean I don't even know if he is cheating on me he says he doesn't and he would never do that to me. But he does talk to other girls. O something else he is a very jealous guy. He doesn't like it when I talk to me guy friends. So what do yous think about thiss whole situation??
I've been going out with my boyfriend for about a year now. It has has its ups and downs. I feel like I deserve someone better but I don't know if it's that or if its what I want to think. In the beginning I was very happy with my decision of going out with him but now we always fight. We fight about the littlest things and we piss each other off at times. I feel like he never supports me in anything, like he disagrees with me and it seems like he always wants to be right about everything. And when he thinks he is right he stays with it and acts all cocky about it. Sometimes he tells me, "what dont you have a brain? are you retarded?" I mean is this acceptable for him to tell me this. He sometimes hurts my feelings. For example I don't work well in fact I have never worked and I'm almost 19. He is almost 20 and he has been working since he was 15. So when we go out and he doesn't have money, he tells me if I can buy it so I would ask how much is it. And he would be like when I pay for stuff do I ever ask how much? Nooo and I would say well its my money I don't have a lot. And he would say its not your money. You don't earn your money its your dads money. And I would say I no but it's the money my dad gave me so therefore its my money now. I feel like when we are with his friends and he talk about me, He makes me seem like a lowlife girl who is dumb and can't take care of herself. Some other example would be: well this in fact actually happened last night I will tell you the story. My boyfriends friend invited us to come over to swim in his pool. My brother of eleven years old wants to go and my mom tells me if he can come, but niether did I or my boyfriend wanted him to come. I mean it is kind of weird for my 11 year old brother to hang out with his 18 year old sister you know? But he was crying that he wanted to go. My boyfriend starts bugging out and says "who cares about him, lets just leave, my mom would never ask me to bring my brother." Well I felt bad so I left, my mom then calls me back and says where did you go I thought you were going to bring your brother and so I went back and picked him up. We brought him to the pool even though my boyfriends friend bugged out and told us to go back home and forget it. Well I called him back and he said all right so we went. We had a good time and all, it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. When we left my boyfriends friends dad calls him and said that my boyfriend nor I are allowed to go to the pool because he saw some little kid who he doesn't know in his pool. I thought this was ridiculous because it wasn't like it was some stranger. His dad knows me and knows who I am. Well my boyfriend and his friend are saying its my fault. My boyfriend starts saying nasty things to me like yea its your fault because if you weren't sush a (sorry for my language, but this is what he said) then you would stick up for yourself and tell your mom straight up no. And I was like well what did you want me to do I told her no and I left. Then he starts saying how from the beginning they were saying no and stuff, but no one specifically told me he is not allowed to come. They just made it seem that they didn't want him there that's all but I mean who would want a little kid hanging out with them right? My boyfriend then says "what dont you have a brain?, its an obvious knowing that he wasnt allowed to come so therefore its your fault." I seriously don't think its my fault because like I said no one told me he wasn't allowed to come. And then we jump to fact of me saying well I can't say what you would say to your parents because you don't give a f*** about anything and say the hell you want. I said how he was raised differently and stuff. I actually come from a hispanic family and he is from an american family even though he if half irish and half italian. Well then he has the nerve to tell me that I wasn't even raised that my parents molded me into what they wanted me to be and that their parenting skills are horrible. While he is telling me this, he not screaming. He is talking and this is how talks on a normal basis when he thinks he is right. I started getting mad because he disrepects my family and our beliefs. I told my mom what happened and she also thinks its ridiculous that we can't go to the pool anymore because I brought my little brother. I seriously do. My boyfriend then says something like "well us italians think like this and we all have this problem. blah blah blah" he says "its crazy how races think differently." but I actually don't think just because they are italian they think like that and if all italians think like this, its horrible because I just see it from my point of view. Say I had a pool and my friends boyfriends little sister wanted to come. Nor I or my parents would have no problem with that. Its just a little kid. I mean everyone was a kid once right. And it not like I don't know who my friends boyfriend is. I mean my boyfriend, his friend and I are like a trio I know him very well.
Yes I know its very long but I just want to explain every detail of it just so you can understand how my boyfriend is and how he thinks. I am not done yet there's some other things I want to lay down about him.
Well my boyfriend is not a big fan of colored people and even spanish people in that matter. He says that he doenst have a prolblem with me because I was raised like a normal white family does. That's because my dad makes money and I'm spoiled and I act white. You know I like techno, I wear hollister and abercrombie. That whole stuff. Like I don't act spanish you know? Well to what he thinks how they act. And so he hates going to my family parties because I'm not allowed to drink and because he doesn't understand spanish and because people at my parties are weird. Well he also makes it seem like italians are the best. OMGGG and right at this moment he just called me because we usually talk on the phone when he's not doing anything at work. Okay so he said that he was afraid to call me because what if my parents picked up it would be weird. And I was like how would that be weird. And he was like well because I might be the only white person who would ever call your phone. I mean I feel offended to that and when he talks about racist situations.
Something else that I want to add that he doesn't have a car and doesn't drive so I drive everywhere and its really annoying. I feel like I'm the boyfriend in the relationship. Also he is not romantic at all. He doesn't give me surprises or cute stuff like that. He also eats very unhealthy and he doesn't work out. I mean I love him very very much I really do but I don't no I need help.
I honestly think I can do better. Is something wrong with me that I think this way or do I really deserve someone better? Like am I the only one who has a problem with this or is it normal. Im thinking of dumping him but I don't want to make it a mistake. Just to let it out there I dumped him twice but they weren't serious real break ups. The first one lasted a half hour and the second like 3 days. But this time I'm seirously thinking about doing it for good. I mean I don't even know if he is cheating on me he says he doesn't and he would never do that to me. But he does talk to other girls. O something else he is a very jealous guy. He doesn't like it when I talk to me guy friends. So what do yous think about thiss whole situation??