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talaniman
Jul 20, 2007, 07:32 AM
Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written an impressive new book. It's called .

"Ministers Do More Than Lay People."


2. Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink

and be Mary.



3. The difference between the Pope and

your boss, the Pope only expects you

to kiss his ring.



4. My mind works like lightning, One brilliant

flash and it is gone.



5. The only time the world beats a path to

your door is if you're in the bathroom.



6. I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once.

The seat folded up, the drink spilled and

that ice, well, it really chilled the mood.



7. It used to be only death and taxes

were inevitable Now, of course, there's

shipping and handling, too.


8.. A husband is someone who, after taking

the trash out, gives the impression that

he just cleaned the whole house.


9. My next house will have no kitchen - just

vending machines and a large trash can.



10. A blonde said, "I was worried that my

mechanic might try to rip me off.

I was relieved when he told me all

I needed was turn signal fluid."



11. My neighbor was bit by a stray rabid dog.

I went to see how he was and found

him writing frantically on a piece of paper.

I told him rabies could be treated, and

he didn't have to worry about a Will. He

said, "Will? What Will? I'm making a list

of the people I want to bite."


12. Definition of a teenager?

God's punishment...for enjoying sex.



13. As you slide down the banister of life, may

the splinters never point the wrong way.

CaptainRich
Jul 20, 2007, 07:52 AM
Again... Love it!
Breaks up an otherwise tense day. Thank you!

J_9
Jul 20, 2007, 07:53 AM
Great one. You know in Alaska we have to put winter air in our tires when summer is over.

benn11
Jul 20, 2007, 08:08 AM
Where do you get all of this? Good laugh though! :D

Canada_Sweety
Jul 20, 2007, 08:18 AM
ROTFLMA0! Those are some of the GREATEST jokes I have ever known to exist. Thank you for brightening up my day a little bit.:D

Emland
Jul 20, 2007, 08:32 AM
I needed those today - thanks!

RubyPitbull
Jul 21, 2007, 02:22 PM
Good on you T-man! I definitely needed those pick me ups.