AllenS
Jul 17, 2007, 07:08 PM
OK something else I figured I'd ask.
I hate how I look.
my thighs are too big. My cheeks are too fat.
I want a flat tummy. My nose is too big.
I weigh about 130 lbs.
I know I'm not fat. I don't starve myself. So no eating diabilities.
I guess you could say I have low self asteem.
The main prob is this:
My husband and I dated for 3 years. I had to move with my mom for a year, causing us to break up as she lived 764 miles away.
We were still friends. He lost his virginity to me.
( I keep in mind this may be the main thing... ) He dated two others while we were apart, as I dated a few others as well, not expecting I was to move back.
he had sex with his second ( now ex) girlfriend while I was away.
no not cheating we weren;t dating remember? I had sex with one other guy.
But it upsets me to NO end that he had sex with this chick.
I haven't a clue why though. When I moved back we got back together.
We've talked about my upsettedness towards his ex ( katie) whom he had sex with. But instead of easing my uneasiness, it seems to make it worse. It actually gets me depressed at times. It may be that I have a VERY vivid Imagination. ( you can guess on that part)
Or maybe it's poccibly the fact that he lost his virginity to me. Maybe I subconciously feel like he's always been mine.I tell myself all the time " I did it with some one else too... it shouldn't bother me, yet, it still bothers me. A lot. Any idea as to what might be the problem here? Not asking for Critique. Just some possible answers.
Also not looking for negative. Or rude replies, as I get that often.
I know I shouldn't be bothered by this but I am. Im so bothered by it that I can't stand hearing about her form his friends. His friend and him constantly say she was a major bi**h and that's why he broke up with her any how ( she tried tp make him toss all my stuff I had given him.) I know he loves me very much. We are so close, we tell each other everything and we wer both born in very good families. Ive never cheated and never will and he's never cheated either. And I know he won't ever. I trust him that much.
Any ideas as to why this bothers me so darn much? Even though I KNOW it shouldn't.
It bugs me to no end not knowing what's wrong with me!
Edit: I also forgot to add, that I've beem told what she looks like skinny(er than myself apparently) long brown soft hair ( which I don't have) tallish. etc. I also asked him if he could do something about the stuff she gave him and he happily agreed to rid of it ( a shirt and a few unwanted cd's she had given him thinking he'd like them). Maybe I just feel inferior to her... I haven't a clue. Maybe its because she sounds 5x's prettier than me and it lowers myself esteem even more. I don't know.
Sorry it s soooo long.
I hate how I look.
my thighs are too big. My cheeks are too fat.
I want a flat tummy. My nose is too big.
I weigh about 130 lbs.
I know I'm not fat. I don't starve myself. So no eating diabilities.
I guess you could say I have low self asteem.
The main prob is this:
My husband and I dated for 3 years. I had to move with my mom for a year, causing us to break up as she lived 764 miles away.
We were still friends. He lost his virginity to me.
( I keep in mind this may be the main thing... ) He dated two others while we were apart, as I dated a few others as well, not expecting I was to move back.
he had sex with his second ( now ex) girlfriend while I was away.
no not cheating we weren;t dating remember? I had sex with one other guy.
But it upsets me to NO end that he had sex with this chick.
I haven't a clue why though. When I moved back we got back together.
We've talked about my upsettedness towards his ex ( katie) whom he had sex with. But instead of easing my uneasiness, it seems to make it worse. It actually gets me depressed at times. It may be that I have a VERY vivid Imagination. ( you can guess on that part)
Or maybe it's poccibly the fact that he lost his virginity to me. Maybe I subconciously feel like he's always been mine.I tell myself all the time " I did it with some one else too... it shouldn't bother me, yet, it still bothers me. A lot. Any idea as to what might be the problem here? Not asking for Critique. Just some possible answers.
Also not looking for negative. Or rude replies, as I get that often.
I know I shouldn't be bothered by this but I am. Im so bothered by it that I can't stand hearing about her form his friends. His friend and him constantly say she was a major bi**h and that's why he broke up with her any how ( she tried tp make him toss all my stuff I had given him.) I know he loves me very much. We are so close, we tell each other everything and we wer both born in very good families. Ive never cheated and never will and he's never cheated either. And I know he won't ever. I trust him that much.
Any ideas as to why this bothers me so darn much? Even though I KNOW it shouldn't.
It bugs me to no end not knowing what's wrong with me!
Edit: I also forgot to add, that I've beem told what she looks like skinny(er than myself apparently) long brown soft hair ( which I don't have) tallish. etc. I also asked him if he could do something about the stuff she gave him and he happily agreed to rid of it ( a shirt and a few unwanted cd's she had given him thinking he'd like them). Maybe I just feel inferior to her... I haven't a clue. Maybe its because she sounds 5x's prettier than me and it lowers myself esteem even more. I don't know.
Sorry it s soooo long.