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j-lee
Jul 1, 2007, 08:16 PM
Well I have put a son up for adoption a few years back, I had to go to Court and sign over my rights to the adoptive parents that I choose. It was my decision to make at the time in my life I thought it would be best for my baby.
I new who the father was the agency knew who he was and they did not question about the father. The adoption took place with only me signing the papers they did not even care about the father, they did not look for him. I made the decision and they went with it. I signed my rights away he did not. But the adoption still went threw. To this day the father of my baby won't talk to me.I don't blame him though but he has to understand I was not ready for that.

Synnen
Jul 1, 2007, 10:02 PM
well I have put a son up for adoption a few years back, I had to go to Court and sign over my rights to the adoptive parents that I choose. It was my decision to make at the time in my life I thought it would be best for my baby.
I new who the father was the agency knew who he was and they did not question about the father. The adoption took place with only me signing the papers they did not even care about the father, they did not look for him. I made the decision and they went with it. I signed my rights away he did not. But the adoption still went threw. To this day the father of my baby wont talk to me.I dont blame him though but he has to understand I was not ready for that.


Depending on what state you're in, that can come back to bite you in the rear. If the father did NOT sign away his parental rights, he has every right to try to get custody of that child. Most courts will not take the chance on that, especially with an adoption. I've heard of several cases where the mother signed away her parental rights, the father found out about it, and the custody battle for the child lasted for years.

I'm not saying that what you did was wrong--but I AM cautioning anyone else out there reading this to make SURE that legally an adoption can take place without BOTH parents signing away their parental rights. Even if the child is in a stable home with the only parents he/she has ever known--it's not fair to take someone's child away from them against their will, and most courts are now covering their rears by making sure that no one can come back later and test the legality of the adoption.

j-lee
Jul 2, 2007, 08:09 AM
Depending on what state you're in, that can come back to bite you in the rear. If the father did NOT sign away his parental rights, he has every right to try to get custody of that child. Most courts will not take the chance on that, especially with an adoption. I've heard of several cases where the mother signed away her parental rights, the father found out about it, and the custody battle for the child lasted for years.

I'm not saying that what you did was wrong--but I AM cautioning anyone else out there reading this to make SURE that legally an adoption can take place without BOTH parents signing away their parental rights. Even if the child is in a stable home with the only parents he/she has ever known--it's not fair to take someone's child away from them against their will, and most courts are now covering their rears by making sure that no one can come back later and test the legality of the adoption.



Well see in my case the adoption agency was not worried with the father in alberta canada, no questions about him! So you are saying that he can now fight the adoptive parents for his son?
Because after I signed my son away I did regret it, I asked the worker point blank if the father wanted to fight for him could he? Were he did not sign papers. She tolled me that it was impossible for that to happen! So my question to you is could we have gotton our baby back... I really would like to know. Thanks for taking the time for me.

Synnen
Jul 3, 2007, 05:20 AM
J-Lee... I don't know about Canadian laws. I only know that cases like this have been fought here in the courts in the US. If your social worker said it's not possible, it probably isn't.

Honey... I don't know a single birthmom who doesn't at least once regret signing those papers. Get counseling, if you haven't, because that will help you a long way towards aceptance.

ScottGem
Jul 3, 2007, 05:53 AM
Well see in my case the adoption agency was not worried with the father in alberta canada, no questions about him! So you are saying that he can now fight the adoptive parents for his son?
Because after I signed my son away I did regret it, I asked the worker point blank if the father wanted to fight for him could he? were he did not sign papers. She tolled me that it was impossible for that to happen! so my question to you is could we have gotton our baby back.... I really would like to know. Thanks for takin the time for me.

You need to contact a family law attorney in your area. You can probably get a free consultation. I agree with Synnen, under US law, the father could go to court to have the adoption overturned because his rights were violated. You may have been lied to by the adoption agency.

But I also suggest you consider the welfare of the child. You say this happened a few years ago. That is more than enough time for the child to bond with his adoptive parents. Changing the situation now may not be in the best interests of the child. Its very possible, even if the father does decide to fight for the child, that he will lose. He apparently was aware of the adoption and chose not to fight it at that time. This plus the amount of time the child has been with his adoptive parents, does not bode well for him winning custody.