If you really really trust your partner, however find out through his email that he is registered with an online dating website...
How would u feel?
And why would he do that?

HEY! Don't jump to conclusions now, there is tons of SPAM on the internet! Who knows, maybe he was registered before he even met you, talk to him about it. If he loves you he will tell you the truth of the matter.

No its not spam!
I just know it!
You can identify Spam, and this isn't, he genuinly registered with online dating.

I understand the date he registered was when we were arguing, however why would he do it!
What were his intentions...

Yes I can ask him but he will ask how I found out!

I wouldn't be impressed either!
But you can't just ask him now... because he will ask u, why were you looking through my email? Right?

I'm not sure what his intentions were, maybe he did it just because he was mad.

Well I'd be pissed first off but I'd try not to jump to conclusions. Not too long ago as my guy was checking his email I saw something from "Adultfriendfinder" which is a site where people hook up and have sex basically (and different types) and I flipped. He also got a message from HelloDarling.com and he was a member on FaceBook.com and some other sites. I freaked out. I found each profile and tried to get information but he hadn't signed on in a long time and it turned out he'd been a part of these sites since before we got together and the profile on adultfriendfinder was a bit of a hoax as the only real picture he used was of his face but the body and "penis" picture were not his own. Although he has a nice body I just think he was more in it for talking and stuff. He also tried saying that he is Jap/Chinese when he's Chinese/Vietnamese. The profile was used years ago so. But I'd ask him about it. I'd say confront him. Hopefully his situation will be the same and it was simply a dating site before you.

I met my guy over the net (as odd as it sounds) and now I'm living with him and pregnant with my first child in the best relationship I've been in. He quit using those sites even though his profile still existed on them. Maybe that's the same issue with your guy! =) Let's hope so.

Well I did something naughty...

After I saw this, I registered also...
Found him, and mailed him, I used a weird name, so he will never know its me...

What to do now>??

Good luck! Hope you get some information. I've done the same thing in the past >D lmao but no luck. Especially because my guy no longer uses those sites. But I check from time to time. I never go, assuming that he simply isn't capable of cheating. I'm sure he won't he's very faithful but. Hopefully you'll have nothing to worry about!

Thing is I know for fact he hasn't been registered before he meet me. On his email I saw an email from this site saying welcome bla bla - it was beginning of June!

So I'm not a bad person for doing so??

Hell no you're not a bad person. Why the hell should your guy be registering for a dating site? If my boyfriend had done the same I'd say "If I really don't satisfy you that you have to look at an online dating site for another girl, you're better off without me because I don't deserve to be cheated on". And see what he says or does. And I hope you'll get information from that site. See if he messages you back or something. That's messed up >O

well i did something naughty...

after i saw this, i registered also...
found him, and mailed him, i used a weird name, so he will never know its me....

what to do now>???


Mmmm... interesting!!

Why are you going through his emails?

Well, yes that is a question to ask, however WHY is he registereing wi online dating??

Perhaps he feels that he has no privacy with his current mate?

What the hell has that got to do with anything??

Well you are snooping in his personal matters aren't you? You don't think that would make a man feel like he is not trusted or that he is involved with a controlling person?

Flower, before you snooped through his emails, and yes I said snoop because that is what you did, how much would you say you could trust "your" guy since you are claiming ownership and all? Would you say you could trust him very much, so-so or only as far as you could throw him?

Before you can expect to get an honest answer out of him, you need to be honest with yourself. If he is a trustworthy person, then you need to stop asking so many questions and know that he will be faithful. If on the other hand, he has pulled a few stunts or has been found to be rather deceptive in more ways than one, than who cares that he's registered with an online dating service because you know he is probably meeting other women and going out behind your back, which may encourage you to just walk away from someone like that.

Is this the guy you are engaged to? Are you still both engaged?

You have posted repeat posts in the past always suspecting him of cheating.

Perhaps it is time to walk away from such a man if you cannot trust him.

And from May "Im not going to do anything about it!! But i have been thinking of him sexually!
Am i sick?"

And can he trust you might be a question also?

He has flirted with 2 members on this online dating!
However not with me (as a member) that he doesn't know its me!

What should I do??

Is this cheating?
Is this physcological cheating?

He flirted with 2 member...
1 saying - WINK WINK
The other
I would like to get to know u better!

I would confront him about it

And how do I do that?
Esp if he asks how I know!!

IF he asks how you know, you tell him you went snooping through his e-mails.

You don't seem to be mature enough to be in an adult relationship. Maybe he isn't either.

It's a tricky one!
As Capuchin said.
If you tell him, he will ask how you know, then once you say you snopped through his emails, then that's it the ball is in his court!

Previously I did say confront him, however its probably best not to, as this scenario will definitley happen!

U could maybe ask him, what does he think of online dating? And married men registering..
However you need to wise of when to bring this up in conversation and don't make it obvious.

There is nothing wrong with dating website, the problem is that if he is that type pf person who will cheat on you. GO ahead test him use your registered information, see if he is that type of person

Well update!
Here goes:_

He hasn't replied to "my" flirt messages... however he has flirted twice with 1 girl already and they emailed each other.. nothing to bad.. but hey I isn't impressed.
He now updated his profile and has a picture on there..
How insulting is that..

What shall I do?
How shall I say something.

I annoyed.

Say 'Mary was on online dating the other day and told me she saw u on there, so I went to have a look, Nice pic ehh, maybe ill put my own on also since it seems I'm now a free woman"

Ha ha that will get him stewing.

Its not right is it??
He has exams this wkend... shall I say something now or after?

Yes its not right at all. Get tough with him here, perhaps its time to dump the cheat.

On his profile does it say he is single? What does it say he is looking for?

Looking for a woman
Relationship status - left blank!!

When do I say something?
Before his exmas?

Oh this woman from canada asked to see a photos and there he goes he puts up a photo for her...
I am so not impressed...

He was using this online dating once at home last week and I walked in and stupidly I said - what's that?
He said oh nothing I recvd the link through email.

So I went closer and said what - online dating
He said - yes
I said - did you register
And he laughed...
I said I hope your not using it
And he said AS IF...

That's bad!
Appraoch him saying you decided to search him on this online dating and you were NOT impressed at how detailed his description was and with a photo also..

I wouldn't have it :(

<i said - did you register
And he laughed...
I said I hope your not using it
And he said AS IF... >

Yeah in that case approach Him directly about it.
Be tough,
It seems like he does not have much respect and think she can get away with whatever.

The thing is are you going to accept this kind of behavior or be the strong woman that a man expects to marry?

Now?
Or after his exams? In 3 days time.

Whenever YOU want.

I haven't yet approached him.
I'm just scared if I tell him now al hell will break lose and he could fail his exams and I don't want that to happen.
Althou today he mailed me and asked how I was and I really want to ask him - oh how is the online dating going?? And by the way nice pic!!
What do you thinK??

Face to face is better I think
But a sarcastic comment like that will surely keep him on toes and put his thinking hat on. I guess...

WHY DO MEN REGISTER ON THESE SITES CAN I ASK??

Guys an idea came to me head...

How about I say nothing...
Register on this online dating - add a pic of myself and then find him and flirt with him...

What do u reckon??

Maybe I'm getting old, but why keep this drama going. What a waste, since you already know what he is up to, why not just drop this zero and be done with it and move on. What are you hoping for, he gets reformed, or something?? By the way, if you can't trust him, and snoop through his emails, this was already over, and you should have been long gone when you found something. Drop the games as they make everything worse, and you shouldn't have to stoop that low.

I have two questions, if you trust him then why would you go through his emails? And if he had something he wanted to hide from you, why would he let you have his password? Is he just stupid? (Ok three questions.)

Well OK I confronted him about it.. this is how it went.

I said oh by the way you should join Facebook, its cool, I have come across some of our old friends from Spain.. I then added - its much better then friendorama as that's an online dating site...

He smiled.
I said why the hell did you go register there? What were you looking for? And by the way nice pic?
It was easy for me to find you..
Why did you register?

He said that he was on Hi5, and it appeared as a link and he clicked on it.
No bad intentions he said.

I said - it's a online dating site for crying out loud.

Facebook and Hi5 are different.

I said have you chatted or flirted wi any women around the world..

He said NO but with a laugh

I immediately called him a liar.

Then he said YES.

He followed by saying - listen I didn't do it with any bad intentions... u knew my password to my hotmail account so I have nothing to hide.
He said I can delete his registeration to friendorama for all I care...

All of this said between us wasn't in an argument.

What do you all think?

I think ye are not ready for any kind of serious raltionship , let alone be engaged!

I think he has no respect and tries to play games to get some kind of kick out of you.
He would need to grow up a lot.

Why? Not ready for a serious relationship?

Just go back and read your whole thread again and you might understand why...

Well I think the fact that he said he gave u his password so he has nothing to hide, means something... something good!

Why? not ready for a serious relationship??
Deceit, trickery, insecurity above honest communications, is not the way to build trust, or work together to solve your problems, in a way that both partners benefit. He flipped the script on you and for now your satisfied, but it won't last long because you will go back, and still be suspicious as you were before you went through his emails. You still have a lot of talking to do, and he should know that you know about the online flirting, even if he isn't going any further. Keep talking without pushing.

What do you mean - he flipped the script on me?
I don't understand sorry :(

And talk about what?
I don't want to keep bringing it up

If I were him I would be mad and hurt that you didn't trust me even though I gave you my email pass word. What you did was wrong and how you handled it was wrong too. I bet you're not completely innocent of flirting over the net yourself. Jealously won't make for a good marriage and one too many accusations might bring him exactly where you don't want him. Men are visual creatures and they may even be a little flirtaious, but that doesn't mean they are cheating or have any desire to be with anyone other than the one he's with. You should pick your fights wisely.

Don't understand why you are all ganging up on me

Relax Flower, no one ganging up on you at all. Just want you to see this from a few different views, so you will have something to think about. I think you would be well served to express your feelings sooner rather than later, and be honest about how his actions make you feel, since the whole issue revolves around you both knowing how the other feels, and working together to resolve the issues in a manner that you both can live with. You have his password you can see whatever he does, you don't have to sneak and feel bad about it. You can question anything you see, and go from there. Its not personal, just giving you food for thought, to improve the communication level, and eliminate assumptions and fears.