I've had a boyfriend for a little over a year and I was friends with him before we started dating. I've had boyfriends before, but he is my first love and we've been through everything together. We've always had big, dramatic fights where we make up in less than a day, but lately they've gotten worse and I ended up breaking up with him. We didn't make up and a couple days later, my friend introduced me to a guy that really likes me now. It's weird because this is always the pattern and I always happen to meet someone, but I'll get back with my boyfriend right after and never talk to them again. So of course, my boyfriend calls and we talk until he is ready to date again, but later that night I talk to this new guy and I start feeling confused. If I love my boyfriend, then why do new guys make me so interested? I don't want to fall into the same pattern again but I don't want to lose my boyfriend forever. I know I'm young and I should explore what's out there, but it's so tempting to just fall back in my relationship. :confused: What should I do? Get back with my boyfriend or try to meet new people? What do I tell my boyfriend? I still want to be close with him no matter what...

You are exactly right in saying that you are young and need to be exploring what is out there. I don't know how old you are. But, if you are in your teens or even of the usual college ages, then what you want from life could change dramatically for you in a short number of years. It could very well happen to your boyfriend (or former boyfriend?) that way also.

People can grow apart and still be friends. I have had quite a few real loves in my life. I am still friends with some of them. We just found others to be partners with who made a better "fit" for each other as couples and also as individuals concerning goals and desires for the kinds of lives we wanted.

If you do end up getting together with the boyfriend that you have had, I would suggest being straight up with him about the way you feel. If he really respects you, he will respect your feelings.

We all like to feel comfortable in our relationships and in our lives and so it is easy to be tempted to just fall back into the kind of state that made us feel comfortable, be it a relationship or a way of leading our lives. I am wondering if it is in your best interests to fall back into a former close relationship where you seem to be fighting so much and things seem to have gotten worse in your relationship?

I am sure that you could find someone with whom the arguments would happen less. Do you want to live with someone in mutual harmony? Or, with someone you seem to get into disagreements a lot?

You have choices to make. I am sure that you will make wise ones.