Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never


Been married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all.


One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her


Quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared


Tea.


As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a


Cut-glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water, and


In


The water floated, of all things, a condom! When she returned with tea and


Scones, they began to chat.


The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its


Strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer


Resist. "Miss Beatrice", he said, "I wonder if you would tell me about


this?" pointing to the bowl.


"Oh, yes," she replied, "Isn't it wonderful? I was walking through


the Park a few months ago and I found this little package on


the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet


and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven't had


the flu all winter?"

Haha, that's a good one.

Funny but minus 2 points for formatting and spelling of "naive". :D

I love this joke. Thanks for sharing it.

Ha ha, class!

2 Nuns are sat on a bench when a pervert strolls up and flashes them!

One nun has a stroke, the other can't quite reach!

Ha ha, class!

2 Nuns are sat on a bench when a pervert strolls up and flashes them!

One nun has a stroke, the other can't quite reach!

Oh no! LOL

Funny but minus 2 points for formatting and spelling of "naive". :D


LOL :p to you ;) but I do have a reason to be this blonde honesy :D

The great thing about glow-in-the-dark condoms is that if you get up in the middle of the night to raid the fridge, you won't have to turn on the light.

Don't be silly, protect your Willy.

Mommy has told her little girl all about the making of babies. Little Annie is now silent for a while.

"You understand it now?" Mommy asks.

"Yes," replies her daughter.

"Do you still have any questions?"

"Yes, how about little kittens? How does that work?"

"In exactly the same way as with babies."

"Wow!" the girl exclaims. "My daddy can do ANYTHING!"

*claps* brilliant Emland, love that one!

Emergency Exit signs - they're on the way out!

I've just had a new foam front door installed - you can't knock it!

*claps* brilliant Emland, love that one!

Emergency Exit signs - they're on the way out!

I've just had a new foam front door installed - you can't knock it!

Now that's bad real bad lol

Have you ever heard of Tim Vine (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tim_Vine)? They're two of his jokes! He holds the world record for most jokes in an hour at 499!!

Do a search for him on YouTube and watch his 5 minutes of stand up that's on there, I bet you laugh your sweet off at him, he's a legend!

Ive heard of him I don't actually find him that amusing I'm afraid he annoys the heck out of me he did a tour with lee evans I've never wanted someone off the stage so much lol

Ha ha, see, I can't stand Lee Evans! I want to slap him and tell him to keep still! (His 'American' accent in There's Something About Mary makes me cringe every time I watch it!)

We should have halved the ticket cost and swapped half way through the performance!

Giggle ill remember that next time ;)