My husband and I have been married for 20 years and we have one child in college and another in junior high. My husband likes to drink. Every night he drinks a few glasses of scotch after a busy day. He has become more distant and non communicative. Likes to go out and drink on the weekends, either with me or with friends. Once a month he will go out with friends and not come home until the next morning. Sometimes not ever calling or texting and sometimes telling me he won't be home if he has too much to drink. I feel like I already know the answer to this question, but thought I'd put it out there. Is this a problem or normal "guy" behavior that I should just allow and let him unwind with friends?

Please give me insight.

Mo

No, not normal. Your husband appears to be an alcoholic. You do not recognize the signs? Time for intervention and you would not be here asking if you did not.

I'm a normal guy... and I drink less in a year than he drinks in two days.

I'm a normal guy... and I drink less in a year than he drinks in two days.

Yes, you appear to be normal.

I will not say that smoothy is normal. (LOL) But no this is not normal behavior. One or two drinks after you get home, is more common (still not normal, whatever that is) I guess the majority. The majority may not drink at all, or merely have a few drinks on a weekend. His daily behavior is more like weekend behavior.

It sounds like he is having a issue and has became addicted to drinking. He has what it appears to be a serious problem.

Yes it's normal progression for heavy drinkers to becoming heavier drinkers, and it causes problems in their lives, and wrecks havoc in the lives of those around them.

No you should NOT allow it. You can find out what to do about it here.

Welcome to Al-Anon Family Groups (http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/)

If he loves you he should care about what is important to you, and wanting a text is not unreasonable. Tell him what's important to you, and if he ignores it that sucks. But you married him for better or worse I imagine. Sometimes just being a kick butt wife will inspire the man to show you gratitude and appreciation so you can give that a shot if you have not already. In all things look to Jesus Christ for guidance and help.