Hello to everyone I really need your help guys
I had a relationship with my ex girlfriend for 3 years.. we had a long distance relationship for the first 9 months.. then she move on with her family to my country and they stay for 2 years we were madly in love with each other but I did some mistake in the relationship.. and we have a different goal life back then. Anyway we broke up and she live the country again with her family.

We stay for a year talking about break up every month or 2 and then I decide to stop contact with her. It was 9 months since we stop talking and after I figure out that I was wrong about some things I decide to write her a email saying that I want to make it work if she is open to talk about it. She say yes and agree and then we start talking via whatsapp she ask me if I date someone I say no and I asked her too and she was honest she say that she is talking with someone now who live in my country and promise to see him in summer and she was thinking I moved on. I told her I can't talk to you knowing that you talk to someone else that you want to meet in summer. She say she like him and she feel alone and want to talk to someone and he was there for her and that she can't just stop talking to him and hurt him. She say she want to meet me first in summer and talk if things work good between us she will meet him too and talk with him about us.

When we were talking in the first week we had sex phone and she sound like she is into me anyway I don't know what to do. I told her I can't talk to her while she is talking to other guy too. She say she can't just hurt him like that and he was there for her she need time until she come to the country and meet me in person.

I don't know what to do really. Am I wrong because it has been 9 months and I show up and want her to stop talking to other person who was there for her? I hope I get some advice from you.
Thank you

You said it yourself - it's been 9 months and she had moved on. You can't fault her for that and it sounds like you don't fault her. Maybe you should move on as well. In my mind going backwards is not a very good idea. Are there not any local girls you can go out with? Long distance relationships are difficult enough without the added baggage you two bring to the situation. If you decide to move on stick with the absolutely no contact rule this time.

Find a new girl that's actually local to you. Novel concept to some people apparently these days... but it worked really well for eons, and still does for a very good reason. It works.


If she's not close enough to reach out and touch at least every few days... find one that is. You aren't married and don't have kids.


Seriously....when I hear phone sex mentioned I immediately think here are two seriously desperate people.

There is no right or wrong in this and since she doesn't want to do what you want, then you have little choice but to do it her way, or leave it alone. I would leave it alone and be grateful for the good times you did have but its obviously over with the madly in love stuff.

OH WELL! It happens that way sometime.