My question is when Women and Men commit infedility in what order do they feel the need to have an affair 1. Sex 2. Emotional intimacy or 3. Love? Why are men and women different in this aspect?

I do not believe you can categorize infidelity based on a person's sex. I believe both men and women cheat for various reasons. It really depends on the situation.
It is easy to assume that men cheat for the act of sex and that women cheat for the intimacy. But this is not the case at all.

Men are visual, women are mental :)