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View Full Version : Do You think the second guy might could be the father?


jamaya smith
Apr 3, 2014, 10:32 AM
Hi I'm 7 weeks and 4 days pregnant. Doctor say I'm due Nov 16. My problem is I had sex with my boyfriend on the 19th, but I cheated on him on the 22nd. The day I conceived was the 23rd. I heard sperm can live in you for 3-5 days. Do You think the second guy might could be the father?

smoothy
Apr 3, 2014, 10:35 AM
YOu have to inform both guys and have them do DNA testing after the child is born. Its impossible to guess which one was the father. THe dates are too close...and that 7 week 4 day time is itself only a guess that can be off by 2 weeks before to 2 weeks after meaning a 4 weeks window of possibility.

Sperm can be viable for up to 7 days inside you. And that plays a part in that 4 week window of possibility.

jamaya smith
Apr 3, 2014, 10:53 AM
This is so stressing me out I know what I Did was wrong but I'm trying to get a clear mind frame of Who is the father because my period is irregular and I know since I'm 7 weeks and 4 days I'm really 4 weeks and 4 days When I count back it say I got pregnant on the 22nd which that's the day I cheated but doctor say I got pregnant on the 23 rd since I had sex on the 19th I'm confused cause if the sperm was already in me that mean that its my boyfriend baby

odinn7
Apr 3, 2014, 10:55 AM
It could be either one. The doctor doesn't know exactly...it is a close educated guess. Because he says the 23rd, doesn't mean it only happened on the 23rd...it could have just as easily been the 19th or the 22nd.

smoothy
Apr 3, 2014, 10:59 AM
Like I said... you have to have a DNA test done... no living Human can determine which guy the father was when you slept with them that close together.

Any doctor that makes a claim of a specific date... is a very unreliable doctor... as its medically impossible to narrow the date of conception to a week much less a single day when you have had sex multiple times.

If you had sex only one time in your entire life and it resulted in a pregnancy... conception could have occurred up to a week after that day.

Cat1864
Apr 3, 2014, 11:11 AM
This is so stressing me out I know what I Did was wrong but I'm trying to get a clear mind frame of Who is the father because my period is irregular and I know since I'm 7 weeks and 4 days I'm really 4 weeks and 4 days When I count back it say I got pregnant on the 22nd which that's the day I cheated but doctor say I got pregnant on the 23 rd since I had sex on the 19th I'm confused cause if the sperm was already in me that mean that its my boyfriend baby

How did the doctor decide on the 23rd? Last monthly period (LMP) or by using an ultrasound? Early in the pregnancy the ultrasound can be fairly accurate to about a week plus or minus. Unfortunately that still doesn't help you. Because it all depends on when you ovulated which is an unknown detail.

To put this into perspective, if it turns out you are having twins, both men could be fathers.

A DNA test is the only way you will know for certain who is the father. Better to be honest with both men than to hope it is one and it turns out you were wrong.

CravenMorhead
Apr 3, 2014, 02:46 PM
The fun thing is you're not pregnant the moment he finishes in you. Not that night, or maybe even the next day. Those guys need to travel quite a distance to meet up with your egg. There has also been research on competition between different men's sperm and how that will affect paternity. It is really facisinating stuff but it doesn't tell who will be more preferential when it comes to conception. So It is, as said, a roll of the dice. Unless there is obvious differences that would be seen upon birth (IE, you're white, your man's white, but your cheat was black.) you're going to need a paternity test.

The more concerning matter here is what to do now that you're caught in a cheating situation. You need to come clean with your man and your cheat. You're pregnant by one of them. This is probably going to end your relationship with one and probably both. This is quite stressful. The other question is why you cheated. How is it that you found yourself in the bed of another man? Were you driven there by an unsatisfying relationship? Alcohol? Or what? This isn't stuff that you need to be posting but something you need to think about. What drove you there? Why? This will open up a complete can of worms.

It is a tangled web, and you need to tease it out.

J_9
Apr 3, 2014, 07:55 PM
I know since I'm 7 weeks and 4 days I'm really 4 weeks and 4 days

No, you are 7 weeks and 4 days pregnant. How did you loose 3 weeks?

Paternity cannot be decided by due dates, especially with your encounters only being 2-3 days apart. You will have to have a paternity test done after the baby is born to determine who the biological father is.

Fr_Chuck
Apr 4, 2014, 12:50 AM
Sorry, there is no way at all possible the doctor can tell you, an exact day you conceived. Dates are estimates and the best, the very best they can do, is give or take one week. So no, you have no idea which guy it could be.

It takes about 3 days for the sperm to reach the egg.

The only way, you will know, is wait for a DNA test. Sorry, there is no way to know..

ScottGem
Apr 4, 2014, 04:41 AM
This is so stressing me out

Sorry that this is providing you with stress but you reap what you sow. The bottom line here is that calculating conception is an inexact science. I don't know how you have calculated that your conception date was the 23rd, but that is only an estimate. It could be off by as much as 2 weeks. So either partner has a chance of being the father. It is just too close a time frame to say one way or the other. You will need to have a DNA test done after birth to be sure who the father is.

talaniman
Apr 4, 2014, 06:56 AM
Why not just ask your doctor which fellow is the likely daddy? He can explain it to you. Then the only stress you will have is how to tell them both they may be daddies and that you cheated on the first guy. That's the cause of your stress, letting the first guy know he got cheated on and his reaction.

No matter how they react you won't know until the baby gets here who the father is for sure.