I'm sorry but this is going to be quite lengthy, it's the only way I can express myself and get everyone on the same page as me.'' Me and my GF have recently broke up (match 15th is official) We started dating on new years, so basically that's a whole 2 and a half months of dating. (not much I know, but still) We both work at the same store (different departments, shifts etc)

A Little on her: She has had a real bad past experience with her previous BF's (I'm the third). One cheated on her, and the other was abusive to her and then left her in the end for someone else. So she has a real hard time trusting men, which she told me and I didn't hold it vs her. She takes a lot of medication for said reasons about past

A Little on me: I have always had a hard time trusting people, so I didn't trust her the first week when she had an interest in me. I thought she was after something really... I explained that one to her, and she understood. But still we moved on. I have low self-esteem as is, and can get real paranoid as well.

At one point after, she claimed that she was so afraid of me leaving her. I ensured her I would not do that unless she was cheating, being abusive or lied to me a lot. And she gave me her word that she would never. We have so much in common, (we watch anime, enjoy the same music, do the same things - both like messing computers) it was easy. We got along perfectly no fights.

She broke up with me March 15th with the reasons: 1.) We expect different things out of life 2.) I made her sexually uncomfortable (we had sex twice, it wasn't forced, and she instigated the second time) 3.) I was too pushy with her (funny I don't see myself as pushy at all, I hardly requested anything of her) ------

More Info, that I noticed---- She never once let me go over to her house (said she was scared to let me go over, so instead she always came to my place) So kind of had a suspicion she still didn't trust me here ------------------------------------ A week later (after the breakup) I heard from rumors (yes HEARD) that she was already talking with someone else, and had feelings for him, and was all excited that he was coming to move and be her roommate (this hurt me honestly, but I didn't say anything on it). I also heard that she never intended on a serious relationship with me nor planned on having sex with me. She asked if we could still be friends, I said yes at first. I Pretty much had an anxiety attack after that, because she removed me from FB,Skype 2 days after the breakup, and I think blocked me as well - this in return added to my anxiety making it worse. I then told her I didn't want to be friends because the memories we shared would make it kind of awkward for me (I was panicking at that point, but I REALLY WAS FINE with being friends with her.) Later during the week (like 3 days of not talking to her), I then apologized to her explaining that I had panicked making me go "on tilt" with her saying things I didn't mean. She accepted that, and said she would still be friends with me. I was then talking with another friend about it, and said "I think she doesn't care about me anymore now" and some how this got turned into "she never cared about me at all" and added with the rumors - and she found out She texted me saying, she didn't want to be on friend terms anymore. And she was tired of all the drama, and just wanted to forget it all. She thought it was me passing the rumors about her. I explained to her, that it was rumors and that all I said was I figured you didn't care about me anymore at all. (given some details I think she knows its rumors and not me- not sure though)

I really do not know what to do at this point (Im scared because I feel like I was the victim of a rebound relationship.) I really need some help her.

Drama, drama, drama. When you realize that a relationship without drama is so much better then you will have a meaningful relationship.

Whatever she does post breakup is her choice and you have no say in it. Being "friends" after a breakup won't do either of you any good.

You said you have low self esteem and have difficulty trusting people. When you are 60 years old and alone will you still be using that as a crutch? None of that matters in a relationship. You either work to make it work or you don't. 2.5 months is not a lot of time invested in this girl. Learn from the experience and make the next relationship better. People in relationships breakup and we all survive it. Sometimes it takes some time. But if you keep yourself busy then your mind will be active and you will think about her less and less.

Walk away... don't talk about her any more... avoid any contact with her in any way shape or form.

THis much drama after only 2.5 months of dating? Cripes... I've had less in the last 23 years I've been married TOTAL.

Dude... if you have problems that even remotely begin to aproach this... consider it a big flashing neon signed that says "Turn back now"... or what is the sign to the entry of the river Styx... abandon all hope ye who enter here.

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Two people with personal issues and plenty of past baggage that work together try to have a relationship and doesn't work. BIG RED FLAGS all around, now everybody you work with knows your business and adds to the drama making things worse.

So much for truth, honesty, and privacy, but you learned a lesson and now have to leave her and the grapevine alone and not react to it. Be a professional at work and keep your business to yourself and tell the gossipers to leave you alone.


A Little on her: She has had a real bad past experience with her previous BF's (I'm the third). One cheated on her, and the other was abusive to her and then left her in the end for someone else. So she has a real hard time trusting men, which she told me and I didn't hold it vs her. She takes a lot of medication for said reasons about past


That would be enough for me to be VERY cautious. So you were a victim of "too much, too fast" crash and burn", and you burred the lines of work and pleasure. You need time my friend, and a life that you enjoy, outside of work, with friends you choose carefully.

You are no victim, you just ignored all the red flags. Address your own problems my friend.

Honestly, I was suspicious. But I did not want to fault her, I wanted to be nice and give her a chance. I accept it my fault I ignored the flags. It is a lesson

1.) I don't hide behind my "I don't trust people" thing, I'm a very open person, I'm just skeptical when all of a sudden I'm approached.

2.) I'm an ahole at work, they dare not mess with me. I was a Supervisor for 2 years, my crew hated me with a passion.

Also... don't fool around with people you work with. Nothing good ever comes of it. And almost any little dispute tends to get amplified in the office with all the negative things that come with it and from it. Which is why forward thinking companies actually prohibit it.

Thank you guys, for the help.

Maybe you were just a booty call and she got what she wanted. Regardless any relationship can be great while the lust lasts, and can fizzle when its over. No time table or guarantees on anything. Most break ups are filled with emotion filled drama. Work place romances just add to it. Distracting to say the least. Down right miserable at worst.

Way too much drama. Work relationships are bad news and she sounded a little flakey. Don't be so hard on yourself. Just don't ignore the red flags again. Take your time and don't play where you work.