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View Full Version : Is he a player?


chobitsfan13
Mar 31, 2007, 06:35 PM
:)
Hey all! I have a question. This guy I like is always flirting with me and always asks for hugs and teases me and touches me like all the time. But I'm afraid that he might be a player. I'm afraid that he does that to all of the other girls. I'm getting mixed signals. I'm getting signs that he really likes me and then signs that he just wants to get in my pants. Is he really a player or am I reading him wrong? What should I do?

manimuth
Mar 31, 2007, 06:49 PM
His flirting says he likes you but it's hard to tell whether he is sincere or not. Have you seen him behave this way with other girls?
My advice is to pay close attention to your own instincts. Usually, they are the best guides we can have. Pay attention to if he makes you feel uncomfortable or if you feel like he is 'con'ing you. Trust your instincts and think before you act. Good luck.

kp2171
Mar 31, 2007, 08:08 PM
Well... he might be any of the above.

I've dated girls I really liked... and, honestly, I really wanted in their pants. Now... not like that was the only driving force, but sexual attraction is a part of attraction and it alone isn't necessarily dirty or bad.

So you can't penalize him too much for simply being sexually attracted to you. Would you want a guy who wasn't? There are threads upon threads here of women who are frustrated by their men who have no drive.

Now... that said... I'm not saying you SHOULD give in just cause he might be sexually interested... and if you are really that uncomfortable with the idea of needing to tell a guy "no" maybe its not a good time to date seriously. Dating opens up the possibility, and you need to be well versed in saying no when you need to.

So nobody here can tell you what he's doing with other girls. I probably was more forward with the girls I dated because I had some comfort level around them... and I always worked harder when I knew she was interested too.

So you are probably at a place where you have to choose...

1) realize you just don't need the pressure, even though the attention might be nice

2) or take a shot and see how he comes on. If he's all you hope, that's great. If he pushes too much, dump him.

The biggest issue is that you know where your boundaries are and you live within them, no matter what attention he gives.

kristynn
Mar 31, 2007, 08:40 PM
Just with these details, it's hard to say.

But, if you get a feeling that he's a player, you might be right!

grammadidi
Mar 31, 2007, 08:46 PM
I think you should just go with your gut instincts here. Too often we don't listen to the whispers of common sense.

Didi