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View Full Version : Friends Vs. Studies


sleepyMallow
Aug 23, 2013, 07:51 PM
Hey guys!

I'm in my third year of high school and I have these really great and fun friends with me. But ever since I got close to them since my freshmen year, my devotion in my studies declined. I also got influence to procrastinate, cheat in quizzes, go home late(not that late), swear a lot or worse, turning me to something I'm not. One of the good things about them is that they support me and gave that boost of confidence whenever I'm in a crowd. They're also my childhood friends but only in high school did we got really close, and they're also my classmates and we have this "all in this together" ish.
One of the things that I hate about cheating or them or cheating with them is that when, if I'm the ONLY one who study for the test and they have no idea on earth how to answer and they kept asking me for some answers and by the end of the day, they're the one with the highest score and am like "GAAAAHHH!" but I can't just say no because they might get mad.
I sincerely want to focus on my studies and be the kid who truthfully answers her exams, doesn't have a bad record (which so far I don't have), stays out of trouble, gets into a good college, have a great job, and have a good life, but I can't since I fell into a really deep hole of distractions. And these distractions are my friend who means something to me. I want to be my oldself(clean and studious) at the same time I don't want to be far away with my friends. I'm pretty sure it's the hardest thing to do because they know me too well and sometimes if I don't want to hangout with them they get mad and by the next day, I feel really bad about myself even though it's the right thing to do whenever there's a quiz by the next day. So can anyone help me in this situation? Thanks in advance

smoothy
Aug 23, 2013, 07:58 PM
These aren't real friends... they might be happy working at Walmart and living in a trailer park...

Unless you want to as well... you make your choice... and it IS your choice to make... your future or these losers.

teacherjenn4
Aug 23, 2013, 08:02 PM
If you truly want to get into a university, you need to clean up your act. Your actions this school year can determine your future. So, do what you need to do: study, join clubs, get into sports, etc. Tell your "friends" that you're busy, and mean it.

Wondergirl
Aug 23, 2013, 08:05 PM
My smart, good-looking nephew-in-law did what you are doing and now is serving six years in prison because he was afraid to say no their encouraging him to deal drugs and steal a car (which he ended up crashing into a tree) and lose his friends. By the way, they aren't in prison -- just he is.

Take your power back and say no.

sleepyMallow
Aug 23, 2013, 08:05 PM
These aren't real friends...they might be happy working at Walmart and living in a trailer park...

Unless you want to as well....you make your choice.....and it IS your choice to make....your future or these losers.


I know it's my choice and I pick future, but any tips on how I can avoid them without them knowing or thinking that I hate them? Since we mostly spend class together like most of the time and yes, I'm friends with the entire class because we're only 18 all in all.

Wondergirl
Aug 23, 2013, 08:12 PM
Don't apologize, don't discuss it, don't make excuses. Just say no. Doing that simple thing, saying that one word, will help not only YOU but also will help them.

smoothy
Aug 23, 2013, 08:29 PM
I know it's my choice and I pick future, but any tips on how I can avoid them without them knowing or thinking that I hate them? Since we mostly spend class together like most of the time and yes, I'm friends with the entire class because we're only 18 all in all.

Its really as simple as growing a backbone and asserting yourself. You are going to need to do it anyway in the real world or people will walk over you the rest of your life.

If they are true friends... they will respect you for it and honor your wishes... or they will show you just how much they really care about you and treat you like crap.

It takes an inner strength to stand up for yourself. If you find it lacking you need to develop it... your future depends on it.

Inner strength isn't arrogance... its the willingness to stand up for what you believe in... and do the right thing.

kita13
Oct 4, 2013, 09:44 PM
I know how you feel ever since I started making friends my grades have dropped and I have become to distracted. I know it is not much help but it appears the only thing you can really do is say no. it is good to have friends though maybe you all can get together and study then you are still in it together but you are studying and having some fun.