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Hurt heart
Aug 2, 2013, 12:56 PM
[MOVED TO OWN THREAD]

I found out 2 days ago that my husband and partner for the last 15 years has been cheating on me by having random sexual encounters with other men. He says he has never had emotional affairs or even kept in touch with any of these men and that I am the person he wants to spend the rest of his life with and he couldn't imagine his life without me!

This man has been my best friend and number one confident since we were 11 years old!! I am so lost, alone and confused and would really live the chance to be perhaps a pen pal with you. I have nobody right now... I can't tell my family or friends and so I am alone completely. I could REALLY use someone who knows what I am talking about and been in my shoes!

odinn7
Aug 2, 2013, 01:48 PM
It's a sad situation... it seems like he is trying to justify it by saying that he has no emotional connection with them so it shouldn't matter as much. I am sure that the fact that they were men shouldn't matter either.

The fact is that he is or has been cheating on you... doesn't matter with who or what kind of connection, all that matters is that he has done it numerous times and will likely continue to do so. It amuses me in a way that he tells you that you are the person he wants to spend his life with and can't imagine life without you, yet he gives in to urges like this. I also wonder what kind of dangers he may have exposed you to by messing around in this way.

I wouldn't put up with it, but that's just me. You will need to step back and look at the whole picture and decide what is right for you.

Good luck.

CravenMorhead
Aug 2, 2013, 01:52 PM
I suppose a question here to ask is why did he cheat on you? Had your sex life stalled? What was his reason?

This is usually a turning point in a relationship and usually not for the better. You're obviously pretty broken up about this. Do you think the relationship can recover from this? A lot of questions I know, but you need time to think about this and come up with the right course of action. Can you accept this moving forward and assume fidelity from this point on? Are things broken beyond repair and he's needing to find a new place to live?

I feel for you and hope for the best.

N0help4u
Aug 2, 2013, 03:39 PM
So he never had emotional ties. What kind of excuse is that! I'd say he must not have the emotional ties he should toward you to put you on this position and then try to justify it with 'no emotional ties' That alone shows he has very little regard for you. He Should have thought of how life without you would be before he ever even entertained the thought of CHEATING on you.